This was one of those films that I was not sure I wanted to see.  I have never been a big fan of the use of dogs in film to exploit the cheap emotional reactions.  A Dog’s Purpose springs to mind immediately, and the trailers made me think that Megan Leavey would fall right into the same camp.

However, I must say, that I did enjoy this movie way more than I thought I was going to and I am glad that I ended up attending it.

Megan Leavey is based on the true story of a New York woman who joined the Marines to get away from a bad home life, and wound up bonding with a bomb-sniffing German shepherd named Rex.   Rex had become known as a violent dog, going as far as, with a bite, breaking six bones in his most recent handler’s hand.  Megan and Rex, however, connected and became war heroes by saving many lives in Iraq.

Some of the scenes in Iraq were the best of the movie.  Watching how these dogs would perform their tasks, out in front of the actual armed military, sniffing for bombs planted in the area was extremely impressive.  These K9 units are amazing with what they are able to accomplish and it is not out of line to call these dogs heroes.

Although the film focused on the central relationship between Rex and Megan, it also developed quite a bit about Megan’s life before the dog and after the dog.  We meet Megan’s family, and we get to see a relationship with a fellow dog handler.  All of these moments helped to create the character of Megan Leavey.  Yes, I think sometimes the display of the character of Megan was inconsistent, skipping some aspects of the development.  At times some of the character development felt rushed.

Despite that, the story the film tells is one of heroism and how a positive connection can change someone’s life for the better.  It just happened that this transformative relationship in the film was between a woman and her dog.

Kate Mara does an admirable job as Megan Leavey, showing us the troubled back story as well as the powerful after effects brought on by the dangers of war.  Some of the better scenes in the film were the ones after Megan returned from the war and was separated from her friend Rex.  Tom Felton does great as a marine trainer named Andrew and Bradley Whitford is almost unrecognizable as Megan’s father Bob.  I remember thinking that I really enjoyed that character’s performance and, when I saw the name Bradley Whitford in the credits, I understood why.  He never gives a bad performance.  Common is also strong here as Megan’s marine boss Gunny Martin.

The film might be a touch too long, but I am not sure what I would leave out.

Though much of the film does a good job providing narrative to Megan’s life, the main crux of the film is the relationship between Megan and Rex, and this is where the film rises above other films like this.  The emotional beats felt real, not forced upon us like in some other films (e.g. A Dog’s Purpose, and they show the bond between woman and dog.  It is very believable and, at times, inspiring.

I did not think I wanted to see Megan Leavey, but I am sure glad I did.

3.9 stars

This will be a challenging review to write.  As I am sitting here, I am still not really sure how I feel about It Comes at Night, the new horror/psychological thriller film starring Joel Edgerton.  So perhaps writing this review will be cathartic in a way.

The film is set in the near future where, apparently, some virus has spread across the world and has led to many people dying.  However, the post-apocalyptic world is not mentioned much and there are no details/specifics about this virus.  All we know is Joel Edgerton plays Paul, whose wife Sarah (Carmen Ejogo) and son Travis (Kelvin Harrison Jr.) live with him in isolation in the woods, following all kinds of specific rules to avoid getting sick.

Then one day, a stranger breaks into their house, believing it to be deserted, looking for water.  Paul captures him and debates whether to kill him or let him go.  The stranger, Will (Christopher Abbott), tells Paul that he has a wife and son as well, and he did not intend to cause them any problems.  This only serves to enhance the struggle about what to do with Will.  In the end, Paul and Sarah decide to ask Will and his family to come and live with them, thinking that together we would all be stronger.

However, one of the biggest issues this film investigates is that of paranoia.  There are a ton of little hints that could paint a picture of Will being not exactly what he claims to be.  Or… are these all red herrings that only serve to grow that paranoia in the mind of Paul?

I will say that there are not many “answers” to these questions given in the film, and some people may not like that about the film.  For example, when Will was first being questioned, he said that he and his family had stayed with his brother.  Later, in a conversation with Paul, Will claimed that he was an only child.  When queried about the “brother,” Will said that it was actually his wife’s brother and they were like brothers.  It made sense, but it is only included as a way to throw doubt into the character of Will. Things like that do not bother me. I have never been one who needed to have every little thing laid out in front of me, with every question answered, but this movie did not spend any time on revealing what was going on.  Some might find it annoying.

The performances were great.  Joel Edgerton has been on quite a roll lately, but the true scene stealer of this film was Kelvin Harrison Jr.  Seventeen-year old Travis had most of the meatiest scenes and he pulled them off wonderfully.  He had several emotional dream sequences as well as being the most developed of the characters.

The tone of the film is definitely claustrophobic, since we really do not know what was going on.  There was a feeling of imminent danger at all times, especially at the night time hours, and yet it felt as if something could show up to reveal that none of what we thought was going on was really going on.

This is a character-driven film that does not rely on plot to move the story along.  The plot is very sparse in many areas.  It dives into the psychological aspects of this situation much more and depends on the characters personal interactions.  These feel like good people that wind up doing things that they may not have planned on doing.

There are a lot of solid work in this film, directed by Trey Edward Schults.  There are great shots in the film, and it creates a natural tension without the constant tropes of the horror genre.  It is a very personal and smaller story set in a world that could have provided a large scale drama.  The story is about trust and protecting one’s family from threats, not about some mysterious monster causing all the problems.  That is where the true horror comes from.

3.75 stars

Since we had a Marvel Cinematic Universe with a series of interconnected movies all taking place in the same world, many other movie studios have tried to copy the success of Marvel Studios.  So far, the studios have not yet had the success of Marvel. That, however, does not mean that they are not going to keep trying.  The latest cinematic universe to launch into theaters is the Universal Monsters Cinematic Universe, recently dubbed The Dark Universe.  The first film in the Dark Universe is the rebooted The Mummy, starring big time movie star, Tom Cruise.

Unfortunately, this film is no figurative Iron Man (the film that kicked off the MCU)

Tom Cruise plays Nick Morton, a soldier/antiquities dealer/grave robber, who is after the next big score which he finds out is in Iraq.  He has stolen a map to a mysterious tomb of an Egyptian woman who was mummified because she was so evil.  Ahmanet (Sofia Boutella) is the evil woman who we hear all about in the long expository writing in the film’s first ten-fifteen minutes.  After finding the tomb, Nick inadvertently brings back the woman in her mummy form, with all the supernatural powers that goes with that, and somehow becomes cursed.

The story is pretty lackluster and is missing some real key elements.  Mainly, the movie goes from being a movie about a mummy to a movie setting up a universe that at times features a mummy.  It is very obvious that they are doing world building as a cinematic universe needs.  The problem is they did not bother to make a good movie.

Not to say that everything about The Mummy was bad.  Tom Cruise was his normal solid self.  We get out share of crazy Tom Cruise action pieces and stunts and we get more than our share of seeing Tom Cruise run.  Sofia Boutella was good as the mummy in what they gave her to do.  There is some solid, if not excellent, CGI and special effects.

The biggest problem I saw with The Mummy was that the film did not know what it wanted to be so it tried to do it all.  It tried to be a horror movie and had some jump scares.  It tried to set up the world of the Dark Universe so it gave us Easter eggs of other monsters.  It tried to be funny and quippy, and it told jokes that really were not funny.  It tried to recapture the tone of the Brendan Fraser Mummy movies so it tried to be an action/adventure film.  The mummies in this movie were really zombies so it had some Walking Dead flavor to it as well.  Since it tried all these things, it never got around to knowing what it should have been… a monster movie.

The tone of the film really suffered from its lack of identity.

I did enjoy the “Nick Fury” of the film in Russell Crowe.  Crowe plays Dr. Henry Jekyll and we do get a flash of Mr. Hyde.  He was somewhat interesting, but he did not fit into the film that they were trying to do.  He will most likely be that connective tissue to bring all of the Universal monsters together, much as Nick Fury did for the MCU (or perhaps, like Phil Coulson did).

Another issue here was the romantic coupling of Tom Cruise’s character with Annabelle Wallis, who plays Jenny.  Jenny is the stereotypical damsel in distress, despite beginning the film with hope that she would be more than that.  I never once believed that Nick and Jenny gave two craps about each other and the connection between the two of them is vital in where the narrative (as it is) goes.  I did not understand why Nick, who is shown to be a bit of a jerk, has any feelings for Jenny.  Because of the lack of connection to eac other, what happens in the movie’s third act can only be explained as happening because the script says it does.  There is no real emotional connection there.

Then, the ending of the film has zero resolution.  It is so obviously setting up the next film in the franchise that it is fairly annoying.

Having said all that, there is some dumb fun to be had with The Mummy.  If you want to go to the theater for a dumb summer movie, you could do worse.  Lower your expectation, shut off your brain and you might have some fun with the Mummy.

2.5 stars

Captain Underpants is certainly designed for kids.  I think that kids would enjoy this more than I did.

I was actually pretty bored by this.

In fact, I might have slept through parts of it.

George (Kevin Hart) and Harold (Thomas Middleditch) are two troublemakers at an elementary school who have been tormenting the principal Mr. Krupp (Ed Helms) for years.  They have also been writing and drawing comics of the super hero Captain Underpants.  When the boys are finally caught red handed during one of their pranks, Mr. Krupp prepared to split the boys into different classes in order to destroy their friendship.

Facing the threat of losing their friendship, George and Harold somehow hypnotize Mr. Krupp into thinking he is the aforementioned Captain Underpants.  Water brings Krupp out of his hypnosis and the snap of the fingers brings him back.

The arrival of Professor Poopypants (yes, that is what his name was) provides the boys and Captain Underpants with a new foil to battle.

Okay, let’s start with this.  I really enjoyed the animation, specifically the variety of animation that was in this film.  There was a section where the animation switched to a flip book style.  There was a sock puppet section.  It gave the film a distinct feel that is unlike most of the animated films around today.

I also enjoyed the fourth wall breaking of the film.  George and Harold spoke to the audience as if they are in on the joke.  The banter between Kevin Hart and Thomas Middleditch is strong and funny.  The friendship is believable and their chemistry is obvious.

The film ends with a new theme song by “Weird Al” Yankovic, which was an awesome surprise.

Now, I have already said that I found this pretty boring except for these items.  The story was not engaging.  The jokes were very juvenile and full of poop and fart jokes.  There was a lot of repetition with the switching of Captain Underpants’s personalities.  Though it has some humor, it is not anywhere near as clever as what it thinks it is.

Kids should enjoy this very much, and in that way, it has done its job.  However, I snoozed through much of it and was happy when Weird Al started singing at the end.

2.5 stars

Wonderful.

The DC Extended Universe has had its struggles so far.  I thought Man of Steel’s ending was too long.  Batman v. Superman was just poor.  Suicide Squad started well but turned horrible in the second half.

However, Wonder Woman just hit it out of the park.

Diana (Gal Gadot) was raised by the Amazons on Themyscira away from the world of mankind.  When World War I spy Steve Trevor (Chris Pine) crashed his plane in the water off the coast of the island, Diana is able to save him.  The German soldiers who shot him down, followed Trevor to the island and led to a battle with the Amazons.

Diana goes with Trevor back to London to find her destiny to kill the God of War Ares, and help stop World War I.

I really did not think the choice of Gal Gadot was a good choice for Wonder Woman.  I had never seen Gadot give even a good performance.  Sure, Wonder Woman was one of the few great parts of BvS, but that was the action scenes.  Gadot had very few lines in BvS and it felt as if they might be hiding her acting skills.  She was a model and many times a model could be style over substance.  However, I was completely wrong about that.  Gal Gadot does a tremendous job as Diana, and not only with the action scenes.  She shows a range of emotion throughout the entire film and she does it admirably well.  Her innocence at the beginning of the film is charming and played wonderfully by Gadot.

Patty Jenkins directed Wonder Woman and she brings some extremely wonderful scenes to the screen.  Jenkins brought a brilliant perspective to the big screen film starring a lead female character in the super hero genre, and she really delivered.

I loved the story that the film told.  Diana’s story arc started as a fish-out-of-water type film, was fresh, despite the fact that the film was similar to Captain America: First Avenger and Thor.  The mythology behind the Amazons and Zeus and Ares was really intriguing, although there was a bit too much exposition about it.  The part on Themyscira was over all very well done.  Robin Wright shines in a limited amount of screen time as Antiope, the sister of Wonder Woman’s mother Hippolyta (Connie Nielson).

Honestly, there was a scene where Diana starts to walk across No Man’s Land, a trench warfare section of World War I, is one of the best scenes I have seen in any comic book movie up to this point.  With the amazing soundtrack backing the action, this moment of the film was amazing.  I found myself moved to tears and that was unexpected.  It was a truly inspiring and heroic moment that brought chills and goose bumps.

I really enjoyed the relationship between Diana and Steve Trevor.  The film spends a good deal of time building this relationship and that was very important for the ending that we get.  Chris Pine plays off Gal Gadot beautifully, as he is both the co-lead and the comedic relief.  Pine was very good with his timing.  Gal Gadot is also very funny throughout the film and she delivers her lines with comedic timing.  The humor, which I thought felt forced in the trailers, worked extremely well in the film.  The film had moments of true fun, something sorely lacking in previous DCEU films.

Now, there are some problems with the movie.  I do believe that they overused the slow motion aspect.  Some of it was cool, but it was used in most of the battle scenes.

And the third act was considerably weaker than the rest of the film.  Like the other DC movies (and most other comic book movies), the end fight was a big CGI fest that looked dark and was too video game-like.  Admittedly it was not a terrible third act (like Suicide Squad), but it was nowhere near as strong as the battle on Themyscira or the overwhelmingly brilliance at No Man’s Land.  And although the third act was not as strong, the end battle did not ruin the film, or even detract from the rest that much.  I think that is because you have such a connection to Diana and you care about her and Trevor that you can forgive the issues.

The villains could have been stronger as well, which seems to be a regular issue with comic book movies.  Dr. Poison (Elena Anaya) was not very compelling.  Danny Huston was there to try and surprise you.  None of the villains were developed very well.  However, it was if this film took the strategy from the Marvel movies and focused heavily on the main character.  That formula really does work.

Wonder Woman was a really wonderful movie that the DCEU desperately needed.  Gal Gadot turned out to be a perfectly cast actor.  Who knew?  Gadot and Pine are great together.  The scene at No Man’s Land is one of the best comic book movie scene ever.   That is not just an exaggeration either.

4.5 stars

Makes you want to avoid meeting anyone, ever again.

The psycho-sexual thriller Berlin Syndrome tells the story of Clare (Teresa Palmer), who met attractive and charming Andi (Max Riemelt) on a trip to Germany, only to end up trapped in his apartment as a captive to his whims.

I actually found a good chunk of this film pretty standard and dull.  It was the typical “fall-in-love-but-the-person-isn’t-what-he/she-seems” type of story.  We have seen this many times.  One normal, one psychotic.

And Clare found evidence that she was not the first (nor would she be the last) of this psycho’s toys.

This is probably the biggest issue I have with this film.  Andi seems to leave her alone in this apartment all day and there does not appear to be any really outlandish precautions he set up (except for the big locks on the door), but it seemed reasonable to me that she had plenty of time to plot out the demise of this psycho.  However, her attempts to free herself are so pathetic that it makes her look quite weak.

In one scene, she stabbed him through the hand (instead of the throat), pinning him to the table.  She grabbed the keys and took off.  Why she did not stop and lock him in the apartment, I’ll never know.  It could have all been over right there, but she did not feel the need to finish him off.

There were some tense moments in the movie, but they were surrounded by all of these failed opportunities that I just could not get past.

There is no doubt the film is stylish and attractive to look at and has some very disturbing imagery, but the rest of the story was really lacking.  Perhaps part of the trouble was many scenes were spoken in German.  Maybe if these scenes were in English or if there were subtitles, I would have a stronger understanding of what was going on and why things were happening as they were.  But since they were not, I only have what I have to go on.  And what I have to go on was not very effective.

2.2 stars

Talk about shooting yourself in the foot.

This film was pretty decent.  I was enjoying the story, liked the performances, and found myself rooting for the protagonist.  I had a suspicion that something was going to twist (as it states on the movie poster), and I had an idea of what that twist was going to be.  I got it …half right.

So there was a bit of a surprise to the twist, even though I had sniffed out part of it.

Then came the final scene.

And everything changed.

Paul (Antonio Bandaras) was a down-on-his-luck writer, who had been struggling with writer’s block and alcoholism.  He gets into a confrontation at a diner with a trucker, but he was rescued by Jack (Jonathan Rhys Meyers), a drifter passing through.  As a thank you, Paul picks Jack up and offers him a place to stay for the night.  Jack starts making himself handy around the place, fixing items and offering his help.  However, things began to turn as Jack started taking more liberties and went as far as to lock Paul up and hold him hostage.

Antonio Bandaras is very good here.  I enjoyed watching him react to the situations with a slight tilt of the head or an original facial expression.  Bandaras is very likable and he helps take this character of Paul, who is clearly having problems with alcohol and anger, and create someone we root for.  Rhys Meyers is just as creepy as the crazed stranger who is getting a thrill in tormenting Paul.

Then came the twist, and, as I said earlier, I saw part of the twist coming.  There are hints throughout the film that, upon reflection, you can see foreshadowing what was to come.  And, although I did not see it and the twist came suddenly, it worked in the end.

But that wasn’t good enough.

The film then had a second twist that was completely unnecessary, desperately cliched and completely ruined everything that came before it.  It was literally the final scene of the film and it ruined the entire more, making it a complete waste of time.  I have no idea why anyone would green light this ending, or tag it on to the film for any reason.  If you shut off the film the first time it faded to black, this would be a compelling, albeit unimportant, psychological thriller that had some holes, but was overall an enjoyable film to watch.

Instead, there was one more scene that completely destroyed everything about the movie.  Worse yet, this twist came out of nowhere.  It felt completely tagged on as a way to … I really don’t know why they would have included this.

Unfortunately, this had potential to be a solid, little independent movie, but it tosses everything away with a waste twist ending that wrecks everything the narrative had set up.

Take my advice, shut the film off when it first fades to black.  You’ll appreciate Black Butterfly considerably more than if you let it run.

I would have given this a fresh rating without that final scene.  Probably around a 3.4 or so.  Now, my score reflects how an ending can really wreck the remainder of the film.

2.6 stars

I was pretty disappointed with Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales.  I had hoped that this would be a return to prominence for the franchise, but it just was not worth the time.

Young Henry (Brenton Thwaites) is in search of the Trident of Poseidon in an attempt to break a curse, but he is confronted by Salazar (Javier Bardem), who had his own search underway for Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp).  On his search for Sparrow, Henry comes across a pretty and intelligent woman Carina (Kaya Scodelario), whom was accused of witchcraft.

Then, Captain Barbosa (Geoffrey Rush) gets involved in the search for the macGuffin as well because, you know, reasons.

I don’t know if you can tell, but the plot of this movie is needlessly convoluted.  There are a bunch of characters who show up that we have little to no connection to or who are there simply to provide a dumb joke for.  Even Sir Paul McCartney shows up in a cameo as Uncle Jack.

I found about the first two thirds of the new Pirates film to be painfully dull.  It also seemed to have some pacing problems considering that the two hour film felt so much longer.  There were plenty of scenes that could have been removed since they simply had nothing to do with the over all story (e.g. Jack Sparrow’s shotgun wedding).  I will admit that the final act of the movie picked up for me and kind of rescued the film, though the ending did not justify having to sit through the beginning of this.

The character of Jack Sparrow is one of the biggest problems with the film.  Jack Sparrow is nothing more than a drunken buffoon, who is reduced to slapstick comedic jokes.  The cleverness of the character is now gone completely.  He is an idiot who just happens to fall into the luck of survival.  Jack Sparrow looks to be slipping with age.  The humor is less there than in previous installments.

I did enjoy the ending of the film, which left me with a more positive attitude toward the film than I had in the beginning and middle.  In the early part of the film, I was actually thinking that this was a terrible movie and was considering it as one of the worst of the year.  It definitely improved with the third act and the CGI pirate battles.

I also liked the story involving Barbosa.  Of all of the multiple story pieces, I thought the Barbosa story line paid off the most.  Javier Bardem was good, especially in the CGI aspects (loved the flowing hair as if he were underwater), but I don’t think they really did a good job of utilizing the villain.

I had held some hope that this new film would recapture the magic of the early Pirates films,as I was a fan of those.  The last film of the series was pretty weak, and, unfortunately, the fifth film in the franchise feels much the same.

2.2 stars

I really love “The Rock” Dwayne Johnson.  I love him so much that I can even watch him in turds like the new Baywatch movie and find myself enjoying him.

I have never liked Zac Efron very much, despite him receiving fairly positive word of mouth from some of the other comedy films that he has appeared in.

The two of them are clearly the best things that Baywatch has going for it.

Baywatch is really dumb.

Now, one could argue that the film knows it is a dumb movie and it embraces the fact, and I would agree to an extent that Baywatch is going for the “guilty pleasure” category.  I just don’t believe that there is enough of significance in Baywatch to fit it into that category even though they have some “insider” jokes that poke fun at itself.  I don’t think there were enough of that and what they did seemed to be overused too much.  Running jokes that were run into the ground.

Based on one of the eighties’ biggest shows, this film starred The Rock as Mitch Buchanan (the role made famous by David Hasselhoff), the head lifeguard on the beach who was beloved and well-known by everyone.  Zac Efron played newcomer and two-time Olympic gold medalist Matt Brody, who was down on his luck after failing to win a gold medal with his team.  Brody was brought on as a publicity stunt to help the reputation of the Baywatch crew.

There were several other characters who were based on characters from the TV show, but none of them really became more than what they were on the show.  CJ Parker (Kelly Rohrback in the role made famous by Pam Anderson) was beautiful and did command a presence whenever she was on screen.  Unfortunately, she was paired with Jon Bass as Ronnie, in a relationship that made little sense.  Jon Bass was there as comedic relief, but nothing he did was very funny.

The script of this movie was really bad, and felt like a poor episode of the TV series.  Again, that could be the basis for a spoof movie, but they just did not take it far enough to really put it together.

Yes, there were a lot of dick jokes as well.  Some of those can be funny, but most of these were not.  One particularly painful sequence involved Ronnie getting his dick and balls caught in a wooden chair accidentally while Mitch and CJ attempted to remove him from the situation.

Not only was the story poorly written, the dialogue was just not funny either.  You have The Rock, who is great with comedic timing, but the script just failed him over and again.

I think you can enjoy parts of Baywatch if you approach it with the correct mind frame.  And that mind frame is that this is going to be really stupid.  There is definitely some chemistry between Johnson and Efron, and there are several attractive people on screen.  You also have to expect some crudeness as there are plenty of dick jokes and juvenile humor.  I think there could have been a more intelligent script using those same traits, but that is not what we get.

2.2 stars

Bubble girl.

Bubble girl finds love.  Trouble ensues.

That is basically the story line from the new YA novel adaption, Everything, Everything, written by Nicola Yoon.

Maddy (Amandla Stenberg) has never been outside of her house,  Never once (I guess those rebellious teen years went pretty easily).  She had a rare disease, SCID (severe combined immunodeficiency), that caused her immune system to be weak and threatened her life.

It wasn’t until handsome young stud Olly (Nick Robinson) moved in next door that Maddy began to wish to escape the bubble and experience the world.  Ah, young love.

Of course, Maddy hid the fact that she was having feelings for and talking with the neighbor boy from her overprotective doctor, (who happened to also be) her mother Pauline (Anika Noni Rose).  Maddy enlists the help of her nurse Carla (Ana de la Reguera), who in a remarkably irresponsible decision, smuggled Olly in to the germ free environment.

We have some attempt to make Olly a bad boy, as he makes some off the cuff remark about his favorite vice being minor theft, but there is absolutely no evidence of him being anything but an idolized version of a teen romantic hero.  He even had the abusive father and put upon mother who take up background time of the story.

There are so many gaping holes in this story that I wonder if the book reads any better.  It is a popular book, but that does not make it a good book.  These two characters are in such an unbelievable situation that it simply did not feel true.  I had not read the book so I do not know how loyal to the story the film is.

So Maddy and Olly run off to Hawaii with their (apparently unlimited funds) and have a good old time.  How did they get to Hawaii?  On an airplane.  I immediately thought to myself, where could they go with more potential germs than on an airplane.  Shouldn’t that have sent Maddy straight into the grave?  Neither of them even mentioned it.  Come on.  It’s like going to the hospital to hang out.  The fact that this girl who has been isolated from everything in the world for her entire life did not even once think about the danger she was in is just silly.

But the ending…. I won’t SPOIL it here, but it is truly one of the most selfish things I have ever seen and it is hardly even touched upon.  The ending made this implausible story downright far-fetched.

I will say though that the young couple, Amandla Stenberg and Nick Robinson are an engrossing pair, and I think they might have a pretty solid career ahead of them.  They were very pretty and they carried off these cardboard characters with a panache that speaks highly of them.  Stenberg in particular has an essence about her that I could see her doing something good in the future.  She was the engaging character of Rue in the Hunger Games film and she definitely has an “it” factor about her.

There was also an interesting story telling technique that allowed the audience to see a visual interpretation of the text messaging that went on between Maddy and Olly.  It was portrayed as a face-to-face meeting, despite it just being text messaging.  I thought this was a clever use, but I couldn’t help but wonder if there were any teenagers confused by these scenes.

However, this film is just another doomed young romance from a YA novel with all of the typical cliches and melodramatics of the genre.  Then it has an ending that changes everything, but not in a positive manner.  I want to see more of Stenberg and Robinson, but they deserve to be handed much better material.

2.3 stars

Sometimes doing these movie reviews are painful.

Of course, my friend Darin would say that it is my own fault, and he would be right.  I choose to do this, and I chose to go to the new recasted, rebooted Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul film despite not seeing one piece of advertising that would make me believe that it was going to be worth my time.

And yet, I had been surprised by the original films in the Diary series.  They were far from great, but they were mindless entertainment, a guilty pleasure, almost.  Could the brand new Wimpy Kid catch the same… I hesitate to say magic… how about…energy, as the last few did?

As I sat in the theater before the movie started, I began to get a feeling of dread in my gut.  A feeling that really created an uneasiness inside me.  I thought about getting up and heading home, but I persevered.   I had very negative feeling heading into the film, but it couldn’t be that bad, could it?

About ten minutes into The Long Haul, I realized that it absolutely could be that bad… and perhaps even worse.

I almost left several times during this road trip movie, where the newly minted actors (led by Alicia Silverstone- who, of course, is in one of the worst films ever made with batman and Robin) started their summer vacation driving for several days to get to Meemaw’s house for her birthday party.  Susan (Silverstone) had planned the trip as a way to help bond the family together, but clearly that would be prevented by hijinks.  Several hijinks including the basic gross-out far, puke and poop jokes that appeal to those with a sense of humor of a 6 year old.

Greg Heffley (Jason Drucker) is the titular Wimpy Kid and he becomes an internet meme and goes viral on YouTube when he gets his hand stuck in a diaper.  Yes, he got his hand stuck in a diaper.  In hopes of living this down, Greg plots to attend a gamer convention in Indianapolis with Gamer sensation Mac Digby  and get in a video with him.  Nothing could go wrong with that plan.

Plot holes and coincidences abound as the movie goes out of its way to show the absolutely worst traits of humanity, not only in the Heffley clan, but the crew of locals and bystanders that they encounter along the way.  The film seems ready to insult just about anyone for a cheap laugh (laugh being a strong word).

To be fair, Jason Drucker does a decent job of playing Greg and carrying the weight of the film, but what he was given to do was so inane and so stupid that it didn’t matter that the boy had some talent.  In fact, the new cast was far from the problem.  Even the constantly ignorant and annoying Roderick (Charlie Wright), the most cliched of stupid characters, was not the main difficulty in this epic flop.

Diary of A Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul simply put is so insulting stupid that it cannot overcome the weaknesses even though the new cast is reasonably decent.  This movie is not about the cast of characters or the actors.  It is about throwing them into gross-out situation after gross-out situation and placing them in such an unbelievably dumb plot contrivance that we stop caring before we are even a quarter of the way to Meemaw’s house.

I almost left this atrocity several times, but I held out for the end.  I couldn’t miss that emotional reunion between a boy and his pig.

I’m not even kidding.

If you have yet to reach double digits in your age, you may enjoy some of the “jokes” in Diary of A Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul, because they have been written for you.  For the poor parents who have to attend this film along with said children… I feel your pain.

This is one of, if not, the worst movies of 2017 so far.  Please think about that before we redo a movie film series again.

0.4 stars

In what feels like an amalgam between the Prometheus film and the original Alien films, Alien: Covenant feels like it clashes with its message.  Is it the exploration of deep themes of world creation and the evolution of humanity or is it a violent monster flick filled with horror images?

The fact that the answer really is “both” is one of the problems for the new entry in the film series by Ridley Scott.  It is both a sequel and a prequel and, at times, is confused because of it.

The crew of the spaceship Covenant, on a colonization mission, awake from their slumber when the ship runs into trouble.  Several colonists are killed, as is the captain, leaving Oram (Billy Crudup) as the new captain.  They discover a strange message (along with a John Denver song) on a mysterious unknown planet considerably closer than the planet that they were originally heading to, so they decide to change course and go check out the new place.

Despite the fact that, from the outside, the planet seems to be perfect for their needs, the crew finds out that they are in deep trouble.

Michael Fassbender reprises his role as David here, as well as playing a second artificial humanoid named Walter.  David has been on this mysterious planet for years, since he arrived after the Prometheus movie.

I have to say, I found the first act of the film to be fairly slow and somewhat dull.  I know this was meant to be more Prometheus-like, but I enjoyed that movie more than I did this part of the film.

It also feels like this film is barely a sequel to Prometheus at all.  Most of the story line of that film is completely cast aside here.  If you were a big fan of Prometheus, Covenant will probably be a crushing disappointment.

Though I liked Prometheus, it was not a film that I loved.  In fact, there were only so many parts that I even remember from it, so the part where Scott tosses it aside did not bother me.

When creatures started popping out of people, I thought the film got considerably better.  There were several very tense and frightening moments in the film, more so than many horror movies.  The third act of the film really did feel like a totally different movie.  It was okay, though I did enjoy the Michael Fassbender parts.  The film was certainly predictable.  It was not hard to imagine what was going to happen to this colony of people on Covenant.

Along with the predictability of the script, the film also fell into the horror genre cliche of disposable characters.  There were very few that I had any connection to at all.  The new captain was kind of a jerk.  The women were all basically the same (although Katherine Waterston was solid as the typical badass female from the Alien franchise) and there were several who I did not even know their names.

One exception was Tennessee (Danny McBride), who was great in this film.  He was one of the characters that I cared about and whom had some development.

Unfortunately, Covenant had another horror weakness to it.  That would be how some of the characters do blatantly stupid things.  I mean, these are meant to be scientists.  They really do some dumb things.  There is one scene in particular with Crudup that is almost laughable it is so dumb.  Hadn’t the guy ever seen a horror movie before?

Alien: Covenant looked tremendous.   Ridley Scott has always had a flare for making these films look beautifully stunning, and this is another one.  There are so many great shots here that you can appreciate the work and effort Scott places into each exterior.  Still, I could have done for more development in the character arcs than what we got.

There were plenty of people who complained after Prometheus that they did not get any Xenomorph action in that film, and this film tries to make up for it.  It succeeds part of the way.  By including the Xenomorphs, the film becomes more of a horror monster movie than anything with greater aspirations.  Not that a good horror monster movie is bad.  It just feels like this should have been even greater.

3.2 stars

I was thinking about the movie “Phone Booth” during the new film, The Wall, by Doug Limon.  The concept was the same, but the placement was clearly different.  Whereas “Phone Booth” saw the main character trapped inside a phone booth on a busy city street by a crazed sniper looking to teach him a lesson, here we find ourselves in the deserts of Iraq.

In 2007, the Iraq War had been deemed over, but for two American snipers, you could not tell.  Isaac (Aaron Taylor Johnson) and Matthews (John Cena) were in Iraq investigating trouble for a work crew when they wind up pinned down and wounded by a mysterious sniper.  When Isaac finds cover behind the remnants of a brick wall, he realizes that the sniper is talking to him over his own communication device.

What follows is a tense character piece between Isaac and the sniper Juba (Laith Nakli) that brings the audience with them into the dirt and the grime of the Iraqi desert.  The claustrophobic film really doubles down on the realism of the environment and the brutality of the situation, despite the outlandishness of the story.

Blood, spit, snot, tears, sweat are everywhere and creates such mesmerizing imagery that develops the theme of helplessness for Isaac and the audience.

Aaron Taylor-Johnson is tremendous as Isaac, filled with desperation and fear, yet never quite reaching the point of giving up.  He bounced between all levels of human emotions, one minute feeling helpless to the next being filled with guilt over what he has done.  He has to spend most of the time on screen alone, which makes the level of his performance even more impressive.  There are some unbelievably devastating moments, including when he digs a bullet out of his own leg.  I was honestly gritting my teeth right along with Isaac with each squirm-inducing second.

John Cena turns in another very strong supporting performance.  Cena has come a long way from “The Marine,” where he put on display his one-note emotion face.  Coming off entertaining roles in Trainwreck, Sisters and Daddy’s Home, Cena brings it to this dramatic role with gusto and realism.

The fact that Juba psychologically messes with Isaac over the coms really creates that sense of “Phone Booth.”  He forces Isaac to think about what he has done and why he is still in Iraq, despite the “war being over.”  Isaac responds to Juba in all kinds of ways, from cursing him out to almost engaging with him.  It is like a cat-and-mouse game of a brutally realistic nature.

The Wall is a small movie, but it faces big issues.  It feels more like a comment on how war can be isolating and, in the end, pointless.  I am not sure how I feel about the ending of The Wall, but it does fit with the remainder of the film’s tone.

I loved “Phone Booth” and The Wall is every bit as good as that film was.

3.8 stars

Happy Mother’s Day to everyone out there.

Snatched focuses on the mother-daughter relationship between Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn, and their connection is what drives this movie to be more than just another silly comedy.

Amy Schumer played Emily, a down on her luck sad sack who has lost her job and her boyfriend just before she was to head on vacation to Ecuador with non-refundable airplane tickets.  Linda (Goldie Hawn), desperate for her daughter’s attention, convinces her to come visit and get over the break up.  In a moment of weakness, Emily asks her mom to join her on the trip.  Linda did not want to go, but Emily convinces her.

After Emily meets a hunky man (Tom Bateman), she again talks Linda into going with them on a day trip.  Unfortunately, the women wind up getting kidnapped and held for ransom.  With some shenanigans, the ladies escape and have to wander through the Amazon trying to avoid the criminal (Óscar Jaenada) who had kidnapped them.

There are some funny scenes in the movie and I did enjoy the chemistry with Schumer and Hawn.  Goldie Hawn was really good here and she looked amazing.  There were some really funny moments from the supporting cast as well.  Christopher Meloni played Roger, an apparent guide who meets the ladies and offers to help them.  He was a standout here.  I also enjoyed the parts of the film involving Wanda Sykes and Joan Cusack as fellow tourists Ruth and Barb.  That pairing could have used more screen time.

The biggest issue with Snatched is the story was so ridiculous that it was hard to get past.  They made the Amazon seem pretty small and the time it took for them to make it through Ecuador and into Columbia was just a few scenes.  Some of the cuts really made it feel like the timing of the film was off-kilter.

Plus, there is a scene with a tapeworm that just defied explanation.  Honestly, all I was thinking with that scene was… “Would that really work?”  It took me way out of the movie.

In the end, Snatched puts a lot on its two stars and they are what make this watchable.  Without the presence of Schumer and Hawn, this film would be extremely weak.  As it is, with them, the movie is okay.

3 stars

Unfortunately, within ten minutes of King Arthur: Legend of the Sword, I was bored and wishing the film was done. That is not a good sign.

Most of the YouTube movie reviewers who I like seemed to like this movie, so, despite the low Rotten Tomatoes score, I went into the new Guy Ritchie version of King Arthur with a hope that it would be better than I thought.

Then, I hated it.

The new movie tells the familiar story of the one and future king of England, as Arthur pulls the sword Excalibur out of the stone and began his return.  Arthur is played by Charlie Hunnan, trying to return to the throne, held by his uncle Jude Law, who ruled England since he killed Arthur’s father Eric Bana.

There were a lot of stylish scenes that remind you that this is a Guy Ritchie movie and some of those actually worked.  Specifically, the time when Arthur was recounting his interactions with this group of Vikings for one of the constables that he knew was a fairly entertaining scene.  Some of the dialogue was clever.  However, there were just not enough of these kind of scenes and when they did come around, most of them felt as if they were nothing more than heavily exposition laden scenes.

The film actually lost me right away with the ginormous elephants in the initial scene.  I thought the whole thing was ridiculous and wasted.

Plus, the film spent a lot of time with Arthur trying to be able to harness the power of Excalibur and being unable to do it because of something that he could not face.  We saw the flashbacks to the scene in question multiple times through the film and there was no payoff for this when Arthur finally overcomes his troubles.  It made little sense and detracted from the story they were trying to tell.

Charlie Hunnan (from Game of Thrones) was adequate as Arthur.  His performance did not stick out in any way really.  He had some quips that felt like were out of place with the rest of the tone of the film.  Jude Law was fine, but he over acted in several scenes as well.  There were at least two examples of characters screaming “no” that carried over tot he next scene.  It was almost comedic and made me think of Darth Vader’s ever laughable “no” at the end of Revenge of the Sith.

The CGI here was basically poor.  I found the film too dark and hard to watch.  The fight scenes were all choppy and difficult to follow.  The ending was much like a video game as Arthur had to go through all the lackeys to fight the big boss at the end.  Other parts of the film felt like a giant music video as montages were the order of the day.

In the end, I really did not enjoy this film at all.  It was boring and poorly shot.  It had unfortunate CGI and the acting was, at best, passable and at worst cheesy.  I was very disappointed in King Arthur’s return to the screen.

1.8 stars