Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones (2002)

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Star Wars Episode IV is under a week away now, and I got stuck after The Phantom Menace.  Two reasons:  one, I got busy.  Two, I really wasn’t looking forward to watching Attack of the Clones again.

Finally, as I was working on the In Memorandum for the 2019 Year in Review section of the web site, I put the movie on in the background.

You could tell that the movie was not my main interest.  And with good reason.

Episode II was the worst of the Star Wars movies when I first watched them back in the early 2000s, and time has not improved my opinion of this one.  In fact, by now, the CGI is so much better that the CGI in this film looked terrible.  I don’t know how many times I looked over to the screen and saw what was clearly a green screen.  I had to laugh a couple of times, and then I had to look away a couple of times.

The CGI in the prequels was one of the biggest problems because it made everything look too pristine. Star Wars was always dirtier, grittier.  That was gone in these movies and it was desperately missing.

Poor Hayden Christopher… he was terrible in these movies. I feel that he was tossed into the deep end of the pool too soon.  I know he is a better actor than what we saw here, but he was simply bad here. The dialogue was just shockingly bad.  I think some of my middle school students would write more realistic dialogue than this.

The whole romance between Anakin and Padme was so forced and so unbeleivable that it did damage to the entire idea of the prequels, which was to show the “origin” of Darth Vader.  To show how Luke and Leia’s father took the path to the Dark Side of the Force and became the most evil villain in the galaxy.

Even the action at the end is not good because all they have are a bunch of light sabers carving up some droids.  I found the whole fight boring.  Even the Yoda/Dooku showdown was lacking.  I found it hard to believe that Yoda was as active as he was in that fight.  Wasn’t he limping around with a cane?

There is just too much of the light sabers in this film (all of the prequels to be honest) and that makes those less special.

It feels as if these Jedi are not the Jedi that Yoda and Obi-Wan spoke about in Star Wars and Empire Strikes Back.  These Jedi are much more quicker to react violently, which I thought was a quick path to the Dark Side.

The whole Jango Fett and little Boba was a waste of time too.  Oh and Jedi Master Mace Windu (Samuel L. Jackson) sure lopped off Jango’s head pretty fast.

This is the definitive low point in this series as Attack of the Clones was just not what anyone wanted.  You can tell that the creators wanted this to be the Empire Strikes Back of the prequels, but, unfortunately, it did not reach that goal at all.  It did so much damage that even a reasonably okay third film (we’ll see about that) could not save the franchise.

Revenge of the Sith is next up.

putrescent

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