The Time I Went (Or Was Supposed to) Go to the Sun

By The Mindless Big Back

Part #1

Ready for takeoff…

Then the countdown,

I look at my family and then I frown, 

Will I ever see them again?

What will I do without them?

10,9,8,7…my son is only eleven!

3,2,1… I’m heading towards the sun!!

I look to my right,

That sun is really bright!!

Will I ever see them again? 

I will never know till the end.

That’s when I hear it,

I don’t want to get bit!!

Pitter patter, pitter patter, 

The steps behind us were all a clatter

A loud screech to the moon,

We all knew that we were doomed.

Closer and closer I hear, 

It is the end I fear,

An arm reaches out,

I scream and shout, 

That’s what it’s all about.

Crash boom bang!!

We land on ufo,

We fling out the window, 

And fall, and fall, and fall, 

On to a black widow. 

Then I crash land,

Onto some sand!!

I see the figure in the distance,

Then it pushes me out of existence.

I screamed and hollered,

I didn’t want to be bothered,

It’s coming at me,

And that’s all I can see.

Part #2

What was that?

Was it a cat?

How about that?

I do like cats.

They taste delicious,

Hopefully it’s not too vicious.

One is coming out,

It’s forsure a cat, Without a doubt.

One look at me,

And he starts to shout!

I don’t know what that’s all about?

I sure am hungary

That cat is free, 

And NO MONEY!!

I can’t wait to eat that cat with some honey!!

I chase after that cat

He’s wearing a hat!!

And a suit, 

And 2 boots!

That’s not a cat!!

I need a nap!

But I’m still hungry,

He is kinda chunky, 

And delicious looking

I think it’s time for cooking!!

I got my pot and pan, 

Now all we need is a man!!

Hurry up!!

We have no time for the pup,

Grab the cheese,

And let’s lure him in please.

Grab him!!

He’s a savage!!

Ooo, I bet he’ll taste good in cabbage!!

Grab him!!

I call dibs on his limb!

Now that we have him,

We can have a feast,

Now let’s say grace and eat this beast.

THE END!!                                    

          

The Pool (2018)

The October 4 of 13

The October 13 continued today as I pulled a film from Amazon Prime to watch. It was the Thai thriller called The Pool.

According to IMDB, “Day, an insecure art director of a commercial production company is left alone to clear up a 6-meter deep deserted pool after the shooting. He falls asleep on an inflatable raft due to an unbearable fatigue. When he wakes up again the water level has sunk so low that he cannot climb out of the pool on his own. He screams for help but the only thing that hears him is some creature from a nearby crocodile farm.

Starting off, I have an illogical fear of alligators and crocodiles. It makes no sense, but they give me a lot of stress and anxiety. I always joke that I am never going to Florida because of the killer alligators like I saw in Crawl. It is a joke, but that movie absolutely scared me. So seeing this man vs. crocodile survival tale, I was ready to be unsettled.

I will say that there were some good moments of anxiety in the film. Day, played by Theeradej Wongpuapan, and his girlfriend Koi, played by Ratnamon Ratchiratham, made an attractive couple stalked by this angry and hungry crocodile.

However, at the end of the day, it was hard to get past one simple fact. These two are dumb as shit.

I understand some things need to be exaggerated for tension, but when characters continually do the stupidest things during a film, it just pushes the level of believability. I found myself yelling at the computer screen over and over, wanting Day to do something smart once. There were so many opportunities to do something else and he constantly chose the wrong one. It was frustrating.

Then the CGI on the crocodile was at times wonky. That can be forgiven because of budgets, but when it is combined with the dumb characters, that makes a tough combination.

And for the dog lovers out there, there is a scene with a dog that is perhaps the single most horrific scene I have ever watched anywhere. The imagery of the scene will disturbing even if you are not a big dog fan, like me, and for the dog lovers out there, you will not be prepared for the shocking moment.

I had seen this receive 97% on Rotten Tomatoes so I was hopeful this would be a hidden gem. However, looking closer, the audience score is at 53%, and I can see why that is. This had some positives, but the stupid decisions, the CGI, the crocodile, and the horrific scene near the end dropped this one down for me.