Spoilers

“Hired Guns”

“Schmidt Happens”

“From Whence We Came”

One of my favorite quotes from Boston Legal happened in episode 11. It is a thought have many times in the restroom…

“I keep an extremely clean penis“

Alan Shore is in response to a woman who had entered the men’s restroom and had introduced herself, while Alan was at the urinal. He extended a hand to shake and she said that he is going to wash that.

Hence, the clean penis comment from Alan.

That woman was Shirley Schmidt, named partner in Crane, Poole & Schmidt, played brilliantly by Candice Bergen. Shirley Schmidt becomes one of my absolute favorite characters on this show over the next four and a half years. This was her first appearance and Candice Bergen immediately was placed as a powerhouse, keeping Denny Crane off balance.

In “Head Games,” Alan winds up getting held at gunpoint by a disgruntled father who had recently lost his children because of Alan. Yes, the father would take his children without permission to Peru over Christmas. The mother asked for help from Alan. I mean… it is kidnapping.

This whole situation led to another classic moment of the series. Denny Crane using his rifle to shoot the father. Denny had the gun in his desk and had Tara open the door when he yelled “Pull!” As Denny said, he was a Marine, “trained as a sniper… or was it a pilot?”

We also get the debut in episode 11 of Bernard Ferrion, a small man who killed his mother by hitting her on the head with a skillet. Alan was able to free Bernard on a technicality, and then gave him a kindly speech about being good. Then next episode, Bernard is back after killing his neighbor with a skillet as well. Alan was disappointed, and sent Bernard to Tara.

Bernard is a surprisingly complex character for the short arc that he appeared. You could tell how lonely he was, and how he had a kind heart, despite being, as Alan called him, evil.

Betty White arrived as Alan’s new assistant, Catherine Piper. White had played this role on The Practice and had come in contact with Alan then. Seeing her resume this role was an awesome thing.

The arrival of Shirley put a charge into this show and gave the show a foil to Denny that was every bit as formidable as he was. Certainly, she was more capable of standing up to Denny than Paul was. All Shirley had to do was whisper those two little words… “Denny Crane” and Denny would shiver.