The Lion King (1994)

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I’d been on a but of a bad run for the Doc’s Classic Movies section here at EYG.  Three straight films that I had watched that fell below expectations or were just downright bad.  I did not want to continue such a streak.

I knew what I could do.

Last week, the new trailer for the upcoming “live-action” version of Disney’s The Lion King came out, directed by Jon Favreau, and everyone found themselves getting chills and goosebumps.  The reason was the teaser trailer looked so remarkable and it brought everybody back to a world that was nearly universally beloved.  The world of The Lion King.

That new version comes out in 2019, but to snap the streak of bad films, I loaded up the 1994 animated version, which is considered by many to be the greatest animated film of all time.  While that might be a bit too high for my ratings, there is no denying that this movie is in the argument.

The Lion King is a beautiful story of love and betrayal.  It is Shakespearean in design (sharing similarities to Hamlet) and transcendent in animation.  The music is both catchy and completely engaging and the characters are wonderful.  Scar (Jeremy Irons) is one of Disney’s most heinous villains, with his manipulations leading toward the murder of his only brother, the King Mustafa (James Earl Jones) and the attempted murder of Mustafa’s son, Simba (first voiced by Jonathan Taylor Thomas, then by Matthew Broderick) proving his evil intentions. Scar is perfectly happy to let Pride Rock go down in devastation as long as his power as king is unquestioned.

Young Simba goes off to meet his lifelong pals, Timon (Nathan Lane) and Pumbaa (Ernie Sabella), after the death of his father.  One song montage later, years have past and Simba is living the life of Hakuna Matata.

There is a great voice cast here as well including Whoopi Goldberg, Robert Guillaume, Cheech Marin, Jim Cummings, Rowan Atkinson, and Moira Kelly.

The score from Hans Zimmer is truly amazing and the songs that were written by Elton John and Tim Rice make this movie extra special.

There were extra hidden jokes that I had not heard the first time that were funnier now as an adult.  This is an emotional ride with a terrible tragedy, yet continues the circle of life.  The Lion King is one of Disney’s best animated features.  Obviously, it is a…

paragon

The streak is broken…

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A Clockwork Orange (1971)

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This is one of those films that I do not feel that I will ever revisit.

Don’t get me wrong, I am glad I saw it after all of these years, but to say that it was disturbing is a mild understatement.

A Clockwork Orange is a classic Stanley Kubrick film that plays with the ideas of violence and the responses to that violence.  Does it take things too far?  That might be true.  I have to say I am not sure how I feel about the movie.

On one hand, Malcolm McDowell gives a top notch performance, though he seems to be yelling too much for me.  You believe that this guy is a vile and vicious person and his actions are wicked.  McDowell does a great job of portraying that.  However, I never found myself feeling for Alex after the prison procedure “cured” him of his tendencies.  It felt like he deserved the pain that he was suffering with.

The cinematography is wild and weird.  The sets and the backdrops are wonderful to look at.  The overall performances are solid.  The direction is classic.

And yet, the very topic of the film makes me uneasy.  I am just not sure that it does anything for me.  Especially with the way the film ends.

There are some great technical aspects of this 1971 film, but I can think of many Kubrick films that I would prefer to see.

tweener

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Weird Science (1985)

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It seems as if I have never seen the 1980s classic Weird Science, because when I pulled it up on Amazon Prime today, I was unfamiliar with the movie.  I mean, I knew the general plot and I knew a couple of details (I know I had seen the “shower” scene before), but I realized quickly that this was almost totally new material.

The reason I knew?

I hated it.

This was everything that I dislike about this genre of movie.  Here I was thinking that I had missed something by not seeing Weird Science, but I just thought it was immature, ridiculous, sophomoric nonsense with mean spirited characters who I really did not want to spend any time with.

I was about to shut it off.  I was preparing to make this a “Putrescent” film.

However, I will say that the third act of the movie improved considerably.  I liked how the film worked itself out and how the two main characters, Gary (Anthony Michael Hall) and Wyatt (Ilan Mitchell-Smith), actually showed growth and became the type of people that I did not want to smack across the face.

So many moments in Weird Science that irritated me instead of making me laugh.  It highlighted the bottom of the barrel for teens and their behavior.  I just did not like what I was watching.

As I said, the ending, while ridiculously over-the-top, showed some promise of what could have been.

This one was not a good movie and I am not sorry that I hadn’t watched it up until today.  Unfortunately, I can’t say that any longer.

stale

 

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The Ballad of Buster Scruggs

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The Coen Brothers are back with an exciting and enjoyable anthology film that features six short Western stories that perfectly encompasses their brand of humor, irony and storytelling.

As in most of the Coen Brothers’ work, there is a tremendous cast of actors appearing in the film.  James Franco, Clancy Brown, Stephen Root, Liam Neeson, Tom Waits, Tim Blake Nelson, Zoe Kazan, Tyne Daly and a group of other recognizable Western character actors.

Each of the six stories in this anthology have different styles of a Western, starting with the Gene Autry-style parody of the good guy cowboy and ending with a stagecoach ride that sums up the entire film featuring some serious performances from Tyne Daly, Jonjo O’Neill, Brendan Gleeson and Unforgiven’s Saul Rubinek.

I really enjoyed almost all of these Western shorts.  I will say that Zoe Kazan’s “The Gal Who Got Rattled” was my least favorite and was the one where my attention was diverted the most.  Not that it was a bad short, but I just was more engaged in the other stories.

I loved the “Ballad of Buster Scruggs” story that kicked off the film.  Tim Blake Nelson came singing into the town in his white, pristine cowboy outfit only to reveal himself as one of the worst killers you would find.  The contrast was fascinating and I was also surprised when it ended when it did.  Buster had been talking to the screen and breaking the fourth wall as he went along and he felt like someone who might continue through the movie.  Nope.

Irony plays a big part in these stories, as does death.  If there is a topic that carries through the entire film, it is death.  The old west was certainly shown to be a place of death and of danger for all by the Coens.  However, there is a distinct feeling of fancy in each of the stories, albeit at different levels.

Stephen Root’s bank teller character in “Near Algodones” is a real hoot.  You can see the reaction from James Franco at the ridiculousness of Root’s responses.  One of my favorite moments was when Root came running out from behind the bank.  It was just a laugh riot.

Tom Waits’ Old Prospector character in “All Gold Canyon” was another great story, this time nearly a one man’s journey, his obsessive battle against the land and his intense desire to find gold in whatever manner he could.  The Prospector’s dialogue is very funny as he talks to himself, grumbling about the success or lack thereof.

“Meal Ticket” features Liam Neeson who owns and runs a traveling show that featured a man who has had his arms and legs amputated.  This man would vocalize famous writings and speeches for the entertainment of the crowds.  At first, he was quite the novelty, but his originality began to waver and he would soon be surpassed by the next big thing.  I think if you really want to look for hidden meaning, this one is ripe with possibilities.

If you are a fan of Westerns, this is a must see.  If you love the Coen Brothers and their past films, this is a must see.  I am not especially a fan of either of those but I found this film to be funny, dramatic and full of wonderful irony and fun.

4.6 stars

Green Book

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This one is really great.

Green Book is the true story of an African-American pianist, Dr. Don Shirley (Mahershala Ali) and his trio of musicians trip through the Deep South of the United States in the 1960s.  In order to make the trip, Shirley needed a driver/bodyguard, someone who knew how to get things done and not afraid to do what was needed.

Enter Italian bouncer Tony Lip (Viggo Mortensen) who was recommended to Shirley.  Tony was a tough guy and he was a world class bulls**tter.

Tony brought Shirley ( or Doc, as he called him) through each stop of the tour, seeing first hand the cruelty of racism, the unfair treatment Doc had to endure and the remarkable talent that the pianist displayed.

There are so many moments in this movie that, much like the recent The Hate U Give, are hard to watch or that we can believe could happen in America.  As a white man, I can just look at some of the ways these people treated Doc with shock and disappointment.

The relationship between Tony and Shirley is easily the key to the movie.  Seeing these two men develop and learn about each other and develop feelings of friendship toward one another as this tour continued is easily the highlight of the movie.  Both Mahershala Ali and Viggo Mortensen are Oscar worthy in their work here and the way each man learns information about the other is a wonderful example to how we can cross race and differences with respect and honesty.

The film is not just a dramatic film though.  It actually is very funny as well.  The movie is brilliantly written and the humor comes organically with the dialogue and the situations these characters are placed in.  The moment where Tony is able to get Dr. Shirley to eat Kentucky Fried Chicken is one of the best scenes in the film.  Such a human moment that is just one example of great moments peppered throughout Green Book.

Linda Cardellini is Tony’s wife, Dolores, and, while she was not as important to the story as she could have been, her presence was absolutely felt and was a key reason the two men were able to be brought together as Shirley began helping Tony write the letters home to her.  Cardellini’s role was more than “just-the-wife” here and she does a great job.

I am sure that the movie could have been uglier as the time in the country was horrible for race relations and racism was just too prevalent, but the movie did its share to shine a light on how the tour was for these two men.  It also ended with such a strong and positive message that it shows that it is possible for racism to be overcome and to bring us together as a people.  If only there was more of that in the world, we would be so much better off.

Green Book was an outstanding time at the theater and I would recommend it to anyone.

4.75 stars

The Front Runner

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What would the world be like had Gary Hart not ruined his chance at being President in 1988?

How many dominoes would have fallen after that?  He was being perceived as the eventual winner of the election, so how would that have affected George HW Bush, Bill Clinton, Barack Obama, George W Bush, or Donald Trump.  How many of those would not have been President? Would the world have course corrected? How about major world events such as 9-11 or the wars in the Middle East?

That is an interesting story that I would love to speculate on and I’d love to see a movie that took that on as a topic, but The Front Runner is not that film.  It entails the true story about Gary Hart, Senator from Colorado, who was the Democratic front runner in 1988, but lost that spot when some of his extra-marital affairs came to light through the press.

Looking back at this story, it is amazing how different the political scene is in today’s world where we have a President who admitted to affairs and was even on tape claiming to grab women by the private parts.  That did not derail Trump’s campaign, but 1988 was a different time.

This story is told not only through the eyes of the Democratic Presidential candidate, but also through the eyes of the journalists in the press who struggled with the idea that they were breaking this information.  Again, in stark contrast to today’s news that exists on this type of sensationalism, these reporters debated about the use of this information and whether using it made them more on par with the National Enquirer, the world of tabloid journalism.

Hugh Jackman is good as Gary Hart, especially when the film shows Hart as if he were a deer in the headlights.  You can tell he never once considered the possibility that his behavior outside of his marriage and the political world would affect his race and he raged against the use of the material.  One wonders if he had raged against the reporters in the proper moments if he would have overcome the scandal. It is said in the film that the American public was behind him at the start.

Of course, now Gary Hart is a lesson for all politicians to learn from.  I’m sure that is not the legacy Hart would have preferred.

Vera Farmiga is one of the best and most under-appreciated actresses we have working today as she never seems to fail to bring her best.  I would have liked to see more of her here as Lee Hart, the put on wife of the adulterous Senator, but every scene that she appeared in was compelling.

I really believe this was a vital moment in the world of politics that changed the way things happened and that had this gone a different way, who knows what our lives would be like now.  We’ll never know for sure, but The Front Runner does an admirable job of providing the core of what politics would become.

3.2 stars

 

Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man (1991)

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How could a movie that included Big John Studd be bad?

Pretty damn easily, I guess.

Harley Davidson & the Marlboro Man is a comedy/western/action movie featuring Don Johnson as Harley Davidson and Mickey Rourke doing his very best Bruce Willis imitation, desperately trying to keep his face from moving.

Seriously, why does Mickey Rourke only have one expression in this freaking movie?  He has the Bruce Willis smirk and it is on his face in every situation his character finds himself in.

The writing is terrible.  The story is ridiculous.  I guess there are absolutely no police officers in the city (except for the one Harley slept with).  The dialogue is laughable.

In order to save their friends’ bar, Harley Davidson and the Marlboro decide to rob a bank truck.  Unfortunately, the one bank truck they choose to rip off is loaded with drugs instead of money.  So, as any good heroes would, they contact the drug dealers and offer to sell these deadly dangerous drugs (they have been told that the drugs kill 1 out of 7 people that take them) back to them for money.  Hm, quite the heroic pair.  But they are trying to save their friends’ bar, so all bets are off.

Of course, their friends wind up dead and that sets off their eventual revenge part of the story.

My brain hurts after watching this.

The special effects in the third act confrontation are as bad as you are going to see.  The green screen is so obvious that I cannot believe anyone would have okayed the release of the scene.

Don Johnson and Mickey Rourke are good together so the film is not a total wash, but just about everything else is horrible.

Oh, but WWE Hall of Famer, the late great Big John Studd is here and it is good to see him.  He is decent for his short, smallish role.

Otherwise, this is a stupid buddy film that cannot ride on the charisma of Don Johnson and the frozen face of Mickey Rourke for long.

stale

 

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Addams Family Values (1993)

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There are not that many films that feature Thanksgiving.  Even in Addams Family Values, there is only a few scenes dealing with the first Thanksgiving at the summer camp where Wednesday (Christina Ricci) and Pugsley (Jimmy Workman) are sent.  Even so, this was a good film to revisit during the Thanksgiving Binge Watch.

Addams Family Values is the sequel to the original film which is a reboot of the old television series.  In the film, there are a bunch of plots going on all at once. The main one dealt with the black widow Debbie (Joan Cusack) trying to get Uncle Fester (Christopher Lloyd) to marry her.  She was after his money and planned on killing him once they had been hitched.

Meanwhile, Wednesday and Pugsley have been sent off to camp, thanks to the manipulations of Debbie.  The children are tormented by happiness, the fresh air of outdoors and camp counselors Gary Granger (Peter MacNicol) and Becky Martin-Granger (Christine Baranski).

This all came about after Morticia (Anjelica Huston) gave birth unexpectedly to a son for Gomez (Raul Julia) and the two other children were attempting to murder the baby.

The Addams Family became really dark in this movie, which was great.  The movie is very funny as the situations are taken to their exaggerated conclusions.

The writing is spot on and each character has their moments with sharp banter and razor wit.  Wednesday is especially sarcastic and delivers each line with perfect comedic timing.

Debbie is masterfully wicked and yet perhaps not the most evil person in the cast.  Joan Cusack is really awesome as the over-the-top nanny who is out to scam yet another rich bachelor.

Some times the story feels a tad disjointed as it jumps back and forth between scenes, but they are usually very funny and that excuses many problems a film may have.

I will say that, except for Christopher Lloyd, each cast member is beautifully cast.  Lloyd is a fine actor, but he always will be Doc Brown and he is too familiar here for me.  I did not see Uncle Fester, but instead I saw Christopher Lloyd in a bald cap.

Directed by Barry Sonnenfeld, Addams Family Values improved on the original movie because we knew these new version of the characters better.  There may have been too many stories going on, but that is not uncommon for movies.

*Snap Snap*

classic

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UHF (1989)

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We move from boxing movies to spoof with the classic “Weird Al” Yankovic film UHF on the Thanksgiving binge watch.

Yes, UHF is very silly and borderline stupid, but it is, at many times, funny and there is no doubt that EYG Hall of Famer “Weird Al” Yankovic went all in on his film.

The movie’s plot is pretty basic.  George (“Weird Al”) is a loser and can’t keep a job.  When his Uncle Harvey (Stanley Brock) wins the deed to a UHF television station in a poker game, he lets George manage the station.  George puts on the strangest array of television programs ever seen.  With the discovery of janitor extraordinaire Stanley Spadowski (Michael Richards) as charismatic kid show host, Station 62 flies to number one in the ratings, drawing the ire of evil studio executive R.J. Fletcher (Kevin McCarthy).

There are many satiric shorts throughout the film including parodies of multiple movies such as Raiders of the Lost Ark, Rambo, and Gandhi.  There are commercials on the station for Spatula City.  The game show classic Wheel of Fish added to the station’s lineup.

There is so much bizarreness in UHF that you simply have to toss away your doubts and have fun.

Anthony Geary (formerly Luke Spencer from General Hospital) also appears as Philo, a character who could be the oddest of the bunch.  Especially when we find out the truth about him.

UHF features “Weird Al” Yankovic’s parody of Money for Nothing by Dire Straits.  He turns it into Beverly Hillbillies/Money for Nothing.  We also get Al’s title track, the classic UHF over the credits.  I would have liked more music in the show, but what we got was great.

Sure this is silly.  But it is a good time, no matter what.  UHF is one of those films that people look back on in a cult status.

funtime

 

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Million Dollar Baby (2004)

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The Thanksgiving binge watch continued today with another boxing movie that was missing from my potential list of Top 10 Boxing movies (which I’ll do later this week).  Million Dollar Baby is from director Clint Eastwood and starred Eastwood along with Hilary Swank and Morgan Freeman.

Hilary Swank was Maggie Fitzgerald, a woman who hoped to have Frankie Dunn, hardened boxing trainer, trainer her to become a fighter.  Frankie was not up for the challenge at first because he did not train girls.  However, Maggie’s persistence eventually won him over and he connected with her.

Maggie took to the sport very quickly.  Once someone taught her how to use her feet and to properly breathe, she began knocking people out in the first round.  She progressed quickly, becoming a sensation.

Hilary Swank was wonderful as the down-home sweetheart Maggie, who was determined to reach her goals.  She wound up winning an Academy Award for her performance in Million Dollar Baby.  Eastwood won the Academy Award for directing and Freeman was Best Supporting Actor that year.  Million Dollar Baby was also the Best Picture winner.

I did not expect this to be as emotional of a movie as it was.  The picture really hits you with an uppercut and knocks the wind out of you, all in a flash of a second.

Great action.  Great storytelling.  Real emotion.  Million Dollar Baby is way better than I ever expected it to be.  It transcended boxing and became a movie about life and loss and pain.  Truly a moving experience.

paragon

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Raging Bull (1980)

I’m just not sure how to feel about this.

I decided to watch Raging Bull because this week’s Top 10 Show featured Boxing Movies and my list was severely lacking in some major ways.  This was one of them so I chose the Thanksgiving binge watch would start with this Scorsese classic.

However, I am just not sure how to feel.

I absolutely HATED Jake LaMotta (Robert DeNiro).  I found him so unlikable that in the first half hour or so, I considered shutting the movie off.  I did not like any of the characters on the screen, including Jake’s brother Joey (Joe Pesci) or his soon-to-be child bride Vickie (Cathy Moriarty).

But I persisted with the hope of seeing this group of people suffer from their horrible choices.  That might not be the most empathic reason to keep watching a movie, but I had to find what I could.

Along the way, I started watching the ambiance and the mood being created by Martin Scorsese and the performance of Robert DeNiro.  The film is beautifully shot, with the black and white imagery and the dreamlike state at times.  The boxing matches may not measure up to the realism of today’s standard, but they are dramatic and told a story.

I saw DeNiro take this mean, unbelievably jealous, rotten abusive human being with a violent temper and send him through the wringer, self-induced as it may have been.  Jake LaMotta had a lot to be thankful for, but he was too crazy or insecure to accept that.  He self destructed completely.  The scene of him pounding the wall of the jail cell was remarkable.

So while I never came around on Jake LaMotta as a character, the film itself won me over.  The raw feel of the characters and the amazing look of the movie makes this a classic.

vintage

Ralph Breaks the Internet

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Disney has had quite the year.  With massive hits like Avengers: Infinity War, Black Panther, Incredibles 2, Christopher Robin and the upcoming Mary Poppins Returns, the company has had a ton of success in 2018.  You can toss the sequel to the hugely popular Wreck It Ralph animated film on the pile of money as well.

Not only is this film going to make a ton of money, it is a really quality movie as well.

We find Ralph (John C. Reilly) and his best friend Vanellope (Sarah Silverman) going through their days in their video games and spending time with each other.  However, Vanellope was beginning to become bored with her repetitive existence.  When her video game get broken and the replacement part unavailable, she faces the possibility of it being unplugged forever.

Not so fast.  There is a part available on the internet site Ebay, so Ralph recruits Vanellope to come with him into the internet to attempt to purchase the replacement part before it is too late.

The friendship between Ralph and Vanellope is front and center in this movie, actually focused on the side of Vanellope more than Ralph.  One could make the argument that this is Vanellope’s movie.  She and Ralph head into the Internet and find their way into a Grand Theft Auto type game where they meet Shank (Gal Gadot) and engage in an epic animated car chase with her.  Gal Gadot is not in the film that much, but she is great as Shank when she is.

There are a lot of very clever bits throughout the movie, using the internet and its sites as fodder for jokes and character development.  Of course, the idea was done by the Emoji Movie first, but this is WAY better in their use of the Internet than that movie was.  Yes, there is product placement, but I did not hate it near as much as I did when the Emoji Movie used it.  I think the fact that everything was used for character development made this a far superior flick.

Taraji P. Henson appears as a new character named Yesss, a head algorithm and the heart and soul of the trend-making site “BuzzzTube.”  Alan Tudyk is here voicing KnowsMore, an internet search engine who appreciates the politeness of people.

As with the original, the animation is great, full of life and bright colors.  The third act was quite scary in its own right and the movie deals with some real deep themes.  It is considerably more deep than animated films such as The Grinch.  There is plenty for both adults and kids in Ralph Breaks the Internet.

There is also a powerful scene dealing with online comments that I won’t spoil but is very well done.

The guest appearance of the Disney Princesses is a highlight of the film and really cries out to be developed into more than just a cameo.  And speaking of cameos… our dearly departed master of the cameo makes a fun appearance here too.

Ralph Breaks the Internet waited six years before releasing a sequel, and it was worth the wait.  With films like this joining that growing list of great Disney successes, the studio can absolutely ignore the less than successful films (Solo, A Wrinkle in Time).

4.2 stars

 

Creed II

Michael B. Jordon returns to the ring as Adonis Creed, the son of legendary boxer Apollo Creed, in a film that sees him become involved with the son of the man who killed Apollo, Viktor Drago (Florian Munteanu).

The sequel to the surprise hit Creed arrives in theaters this Thanksgiving with a solid, if not quite as spectacular, film in the Rocky franchise.

Sylvester Stallone returns to his iconic role of Rocky Balboa for this sequel that deals with the once powerful Ivan Drago (Dolph Lundgren) and his son finding the perfect moment to launch an attack on the newly crowned world champion, Adonis Creed.

There are a lot of scenes that deal with the tragic events from Rocky IV back in the 1980s where Ivan Drago killed Apollo in a boxing match, a match where Rocky wanted to throw in the towel, but did not.  There are many good emotional beats coming from this event, in particular from Stallone, who had to deal with his choices for years.

We also find out that the years were not kind to Ivan Drago either as the Russian people treated him as an outcast, throwing him and his son, to the side after the crushing defeat at the hands of Balboa.

Creed II truly is what you get when you combine Rocky IV with Rocky III.  Not that combining those two films is a bad thing, but you clearly can see several of the beats of those Rocky movies in Creed II.  Some claim that the original Creed was really a remake of the first Rocky, but there were enough differences and originality that made it its own.  This one could have used a little more originality to help separate it from these past Rocky movies.

However, the film is very good anyway.  The boxing scenes at the end are excellent (though not near as great as the one shot match from Creed).  The scenes between Jordan and Stallone are some of the film’s best too.

The film goes heavily into the relationship between Creed and his wife Bianca (Tessa Thompson) and they have a great chemistry.  Their relationship is a major selling point for this movie as it is unlike most relationships in this type of movie.

I even really enjoyed the little bit of characterization that the film gave to the Dragos.  They provided just enough detail to make you see these two men as real people and not the mindless Russian monster, like Ivan Drago was portrayed as in Rocky IV.  I liked the stuff from their background.

I did find it very contrived with how the final match wound up occurring where it occurred.  I had a hard time believing that is what would actually happen and it pulled me out of the movie.  I found, as well, the final training montage to be uninspired and a basic throwback to the past Rocky movies.

However, the boxing match is outstanding, the relationships and the characters themselves are really great and every story gets wrapped up beautifully.  While this may not be quite an equal to the original Creed picture, the sequel is a fine movie in its own accord.

4.25 stars

Robin Hood (2018)

This Thanksgiving break started today and I went to a Tuesday night opening.  With the available choices of Ralph Breaks the Internet and Creed 2, you may ask, “How did you wind up at Robin Hood?”  I was asking myself that question as well.

The real answer is scheduling.  I planned out the five or so movies I need to see this break and it worked best to see the new version of Robin Hood on the Tuesday night.

And I did go into the film with as much of an open mind as I could.  In fact, about ten minutes into the film, I am making cracks in my head, but I stopped and told myself… keep an open mind, Doc.

Unfortunately, that open mind did not make this a good movie.  I really tried.

Robin of Loxley (Taron Egerton) caught the thief Marion (Eve Hewson) stealing his horses and they began a whirlwind love affair.  Until Loxley was drafted into the Crusades and had to go to war.  While at war, he tried to prevent crazy military leader Gisborne (Paul Anderson) from beheading the son of Jamie Foxx.  He failed, and wound up being shot with an arrow.  As we find out, Robin, or Rob as everyone called him for some inane reason, seemed to be immune to being shot with an arrow.  Just pull it out.

Anyway, he was sent home and Jamie Foxx followed him somehow.  He apparently knew everything about Loxley and knew of his relationship with Marion, who had believed that Rob was dead.  She moved on with Will Scarlett (Jamie Dornan) making Rob sad.

By the way, there was a scene where Marion and Rob came face to face for the first time and I swear it was a scene right out of The Princess Bride.  Rob asked her why she did not wait for him and Marion responded that he was dead.  I immediately said to myself, “Death cannot stop true love.  All it can do is delay it for awhile.”  Classic.

Back to the “story,” Jamie Foxx wants to train Rob and make him into Batman and send him against the Sheriff of Nottingham (Ben Mendelsohn) to revenge his son’s death, despite the fact that the man who actually ordered his son’s beheading was also still out there.

So Rob got himself an Arrow from the CW costume and continued his training to become a comic book archer.

This thing was hilarious throughout the film, although it had not intended to be.  Some of the dialogue was just horrendous.  The acting was fine for what they were given, but the story was thin and ridiculous and the dialogue was worse yet.

And then there was Ben Mendelsohn.  Poor Ben was just as bad as I have seen.  He was so over-the-top with EVERY line that I wondered if he was being satirical (Hint-he wasn’t).  His performance was laughable and I found him to be a total waste of a character and an actor who has skills.  Just not sure what he was going for here.

The action was okay at times, but it really did not mean anything.  Rob Hood was shot a second time (or was it third?) in the third act and it barely slowed him down.  As soon as the arrow was pulled form his shoulder, he kept going as if nothing had happened at all.

Then, again in the third act, Egerton’s role as Batman Hood is confirmed as one of the characters suddenly becomes Two-Face.  Literally, it was a near exact way that Harvey Dent became Two-Face in The Dark Knight.

Did I mention that Jamie Foxx’s character’s real name translates into “John?”

Jamie Dornan’s character waffled drastically between positions and was never truly a well crafted and realistic person.  He was just written so poorly that Dornan had no chance even with a strong performance.  He was totally inconsistent with his ideas and what happens to him makes ZERO sense.

But sense was not the main component of this movie.  Instead it took the DNA of several more successful movies, including the Nolan Batman trilogy, Princess Bride, Tolkien stuff, and mixed them together hoping to find something that would make this iteration of Robin Hood a viable franchise.  They had a solid cast, but that cast could not escape the wholesale garbage given them to act.  Ben Mendelsohn chewed the scenery every moment he was on screen, only being topped by F. Murray Abraham, whose Cardinal character was so one-note that you could not believe that the writers couldn’t give him SOMETHING to work with.

Oh, and there were a couple of times where it sounded as Mendelsohn’s Sheriff was Donald Trump.  The film took maybe one or two moments where it felt like they were gearing up to set him up as a symbol for the current US President.  Then, the film completely abandoned the point.  They also tried to get Loxley to infiltrate the inner circle of the Sheriff and the Cardinal, which worked like a charm.  Problem was the film also immediately tossed this plot point aside as well.  There was no pay off for any of that in the story.

The only good thing I can say about Robin Hood is that it is now out of the way and I can, hopefully, prepare to see the considerably better movies during the remainder of break.

0.85 stars

 

Juliet, Naked

Image result for juliet naked movie poster

I had seen trailers for this movie earlier this year, but it never found ts way to any theaters in my vicinity.  However, when I saw this on iTunes, I was excited about getting a chance to see it at home.

And it was a good film.

Annie Platt (Rose Byrne) was becoming tired of her boyfriend (Chris O’Dowd) and his obsession with long absent rocker Tucker Crowe (Ethan Hawke). So when an album of Tucker’s music is unearthed and released, Annie takes the chance to write a scathing review of it.

Her boyfriend Duncan was mad at her, but she received a unexpected response.  Tucker Crowe himself read the review and agreed with her.  They then began a correspondence via e-mail and on the phone.

When she discovered that Duncan had cheated on her, their relationship ended.  However, Tucker’s minor heart attack made things even more odd.

This film is a sweet romantic comedy with a group of solid performances and a well written script.  The story itself feels a bit slight, but I did like the relationship between Rose Byrne and Ethan Hawke.  Then, Chris O’Dowd is pretty funny as the obsessed fan who finds his hero in an unexpected place.

The story of Tucker and his gaggle of children that he did not know he had was interesting, but it seemed to be over too quickly.

This is deeper than most rom-coms but, even so, there is not a huge amount of plot.  Most of the film is resolved after the hour and a half.

Rose Byrne is great.  She brings a lot of charm to the movie and the little boy who plays Tucker’s son Jackson (Azhy Robertson) was a nice addition.

Juliet, Naked is a nice film to watch on an evening when you do not have anything else to do.  It might be a bit too slight, but that does not keep it from being a suitable watch.

3.3 stars