Author Archives: Doc

The Cookie Clicker Mystery

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 The Cookie Clicker Mystery 

 By  K.N.

In the year 2013 there was a kid named Lucas John but we called him LJ for short. LJ loved to play this game called cookie clicker which was really popular. Every day after school LJ hoped on his Microsoft Surface Pro. One of LJ’s friends named Michal Peterson and he would always come over to LJ’s house and play with him. But one day on February 12, 2015 when Michal went to LJ’s house they hoped on Cookie clicker and when they clicked to buy something the computer started to glitch and it spread to Michal and turned him into an alien. 

Once he fully became an alien he ascended into space and he didn’t come back. “3 years later” Michal has arrived back “djehhguerhdlgdiwbjhrf ” he said I said “ what Michal “ he said “djehhguerhdlgdiwbjhrf “ so I translated it and he said “. I have come to take over your world and burn it “ I was shocked because about 5 minutes later there were these giant robots called uberpods which were equipped with machine guns and rpg’s and laser rifles. I was terrified for my life, but he said he would spare me only if I told him where the data center was. So I told him because I didn’t want to die because nobody wants to die. 

Later that afternoon me and Michal went to the store to get some lemons because we wanted to make everyone in the city afraid of the word lemon. Then we found some people and we said “lemon” and threw it at them and they looked up and we were gone. After we hung out for a little bit Michal said he had to go back to his planet that he was trying to conquer. I said my goodbyes and he was off, but he said he would be back in a couple of years to see me again.   

National Biographic (A Mockumentary)

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National Biographic

-LMM

“Welcome to National Biographic! Today, we here have the Common Male American, but as you can tell, this is a big catch today,“ The camera zoomed into a guy at a park that looked identical to Tom Crust, just trying to eat a sandwich in peace. “Here we catch this wild animal snacking on it’s natural prey, The Sandwich, this creature is typically an easy one to find eating, as that’s it’s main directive in life! Isn’t that awesome?” The camera focused on the sandwich, and then the person turned towards us. “It appears that the predator has spotted our filming team capturing their essence,”

“Dude, why are you filming me?” The person got closer to the camera.

“Go, go!” The camera was dragged against grass and concrete so nothing was seen, only heard.

“Hey! Get back here!”

“Go back to the studio!” The camera cut, and returned to the inside of a tree, pointing downwards back at the same person.

“Welcome back to National Biographic, today, we have found the Common Male American yet again, besides it’s name having the word common, this is actually quite a rare species! Only one of these Common Male Americans that exists in the world!” The camera focused yet again, this time the person was walking away from the park. “Quietly we must follow,” And the camera fell to the ground, cracking the lens, and on a sidewalk facing the person.

“What the- Are you still filming me?” The person shouted. “Do you think I’m Tom Crust or something?” They shouted again. The sound of the production team falling out the tree was heard, but they weren’t in the field of view. 

“Wait, are you not? Scrap everything! Who fact checked this? Just leave the camera on the ground, it’s useless!” The team bickered and walked away. The person then walked up to the camera, and picked up the camera.

“I wasn’t expecting that to work so well, too bad I am Tom Crust… They’ll get over it,” Tom Crust then pressed pause on the camera, stopping everything.

The Perfect Family

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There was a family everyone admired. The D’Amore family looked perfect from the outside—a loving mother, a hardworking father, and three well-behaved daughters. Little did they know, perfection can hide terrible secrets.

         It was November 15, 1992, the D’Amores arrived at church at  7:30 p.m. The building was quiet, and the air felt strangely cold, as they stepped inside. Before church the family went to turn the lights on and unlock the doors. When the girls got back together the lights went out and Charlotte went to turn the circuit breaker back on.

That’s when the screaming began.

Mr. D’Amore  body lay motionless in the hallway, blood pooling beneath him. He had been murdered. Mrs. D’Amore immediately called the police, clutching her younger twins, Lizzy and Belle, who were crying in confusion. When the officers arrived, Mrs. D’Amore realized Charlotte, her oldest daughter, was missing.

Moments later, a scream echoed from the back hallway. Charlotte appeared walking toward them, oddly calm .She told the police she saw something, something she couldn’t explain, almost demonic in nature in the pale glow of the moon light.

The police took the family home that night. Once inside, Mrs. D’Amore sat her daughters down and spoke gently. “Something very bad happened to your father,” she said. “But we are safe now.” She turned to Charlotte. “Are you okay, sweetheart? I know that was scary.”

Charlotte stared at the floor. “I can’t stop seeing his body,” she whispered. “Mom, I’m scared. Her mother hugged her tightly. “No, Charlotte. You didn’t do anything wrong. Go get some sleep.”

Charlotte went to bed with her sisters that night listening to their quiet breathing. What her mother didn’t know was that Charlotte had lied, she remembered seeing the figure first, seeing the blade in her hands, then washing something off her hands.

One year later the family returned to the church where it all took place and tragedy struck again. Mrs. D’Amore was killed in the same hallway as her husband. This time Charlotte was seen with a blade in her hands. Years of being starved, and abused had filled her with rage. Something about that church and that day had caused her to snap and finally act out. Charlotte was arrested, and Lizzy and Belle were taken away.

Ten years later, Charlotte was released, her only desire is to find her sisters.

By: E.N.S

I Forgot

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E.M.

One day an author wrote a story that had 5 characters.The story was about 5 old people playing cars and their names were Joe, Bob, Sherrill, Kathy and there was a 5 person. But who was that 5th person? It was a mystery. But they were determined to find out who this person was. 

So they began their first game of cards. Joe drew first and picked up 3 spades. Next the mystery person went, they all examined his face to see if they could remember who he was or if they even knew who he was.

Once the first game of cards was done it was sherrill who won and they then decided to go get some food and learn more about this mystery person. 

They all ordered chicken because everybody likes chicken and once they got their food they began to question the man. They asked him things like; where he was from, how he randomly showed up with them, what his favorite color was, etc. They learned that his favorite color was orange but they couldn’t remember anything else. 

Wait a minute they all thought, why can’t we remember anything he just told us? And then they remembered, they had all been diagnosed with a disease but they couldn’t remember the name. 

Then the secret man told him, you all have dementia and I am your caretaker. They were all confused what dementia was and why they needed a caretaker. So the doctor explained to them that dementia meant that they were beginning to not remember everything. But they were confused and they didn’t think they were forgetting anything at all. They believed he was lying to them and he was a fake caretaker and called the police on him. But they couldn’t remember what number it was to call the police. So the question remained, was this a fake caretaker or did they really have this dementia disease?

A Dark Town

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A Dark Town

In Houston, July 21, 2004, a report came into the Waller County Police Station about a supposed alien siting while a man was sitting in his backyard. The report wasn’t from the man, but from his neighbor, who had called the station 5 other times that week about seeing an unnatural amount of light coming in through his bedroom window, seeing his neighbor just looking up in the sky at nothing, and at one point, he even saw weird non human foot prints outside his house. 

Miguel, who was the man who made the calls, went over to the man’s house to talk about the strange things that were happening. The guy’s name was Dan. They ended up talking a while, and Miguel said that he thought that the aliens were kidnapping people and putting them in their UFOs and taking their places.

When Miguel suggested this idea, Dan agreed but for a second, he looked very surprised that Miguel’s theory was so complex. Dan asked Miguel how he thought this, and Miguel said that he’s been thinking about it for a while and that was his best guess.

Miguel went home and went on with his evening. At 8:04 pm, he heard a sudden scream come from Dan’s house. As soon as he heard it he wanted to hide, but knew that he had to find out what was happening, so he ran to Dan’s house. Miguel stepped inside the house, because the door was open, but when he walked in he saw Dan…his eyes were glowing white and light was shooting out from his limbs. He was making a  terrible screeching sound that almost made Miguel black out right there.

Miguel looked at his watch and he realized that the time passed an hour and it was now 9:03 pm. Dan must be doing this. The sky quickly became dark until it was 10 pm. Dan slowly turned into an alien. Miguel now knew…Dan was always an alien. 

Once Dan was done transforming , a UFO came out of the sky and beamed the stolen residents down. Miguel took the chance and pushed Dan into the beam, and he got sucked up. The hatch to the ship closed too soon, so Dan hit the bottom of the ship. With the force of the hit, the alien’s ship blew up. Miguel saved the hostages and they all went back home.

The Homeless Crime

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The Homeless Crime

By: L.M 

There was this homeless man. 

“I’m going to try and get money!”

So the day after he went around the city and found as many clothes he could find, it didn’t matter the color. After he found what he could he put the clothes on over his other clothes that he had on and went back to his box to sleep for that night because it was getting dark outside. 

It is now the next day the homeless man woke up, He was hungry of course but there was no food around that’s why he wanted money.  After thinking about how to get money he remembered the clothes he found and he was going to use them to rob a bank for at least $1,000, he wanted at least that much because he didn’t want to starve. He was fine with sleeping in a box but having no food was not acceptable with his standards.

 Now It’s 9:15 AM now the homeless man thought that he shouldn’t rob a bank yet, he thought about going and stealing peoples wallets. He thought about it for 28 minutes and he decided that it was a good idea so he put on those clothes that he found and did just that. After a long time it was now 12:45 PM, He had gotten 3 wallets, the money that was in the wallets added up to $51 with that cash. He remembered that he lived by a GoodWill, so he went into the GoodWill and bought a pair of pants, shirt, gloves, winter hat, socks and shoes the cost of all that was $20.39 with tax.

Now he goes to a place called McDonald’s and just gets some fries for $3.86 with tax. But only the fries didn’t fill him up because he hasn’t eaten in 3 days so he went back into Mcdonald’s and ordered 2 Big Mac meals For $16.46 Including tax. With purchasing all that stuff he is left with $10.29. After that he went to a home depot to get a ski mask for $5.08 and now the homeless man will steal wallets for a living until he can get a job.

THE END

Daily Countdown: TV Show Themes #65

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#65

Sesame Street

Title: “Can You Tell Me How to Get to Sesame Street?” (aka “Sunny Days”)

Composed: Joe Raposo

Written by: Joe Raposo, Jon Stone, and Bruce Hart

Performed: a mix of children’s choir and jazz musicians, including harmonicist Jean “Toots” Thielemans.

Some instruments used include such unlikely instruments like electric keyboards such as the Fender Rhodes and hard-headed mallets on the vibraphone.

One of the most iconic children’s shows of all time, Sesame Street required a theme song that would be fun and whimsical to engage the learning and the opening of minds. The Sesame Street theme song is known worldwide and blends perfectly the goal of the program.

Joe Raposo also wrote songs for Sesame Street such as “Bein’ Green,” “C is for Cookie,” and “Sing (a Song).”

The song is so big that even The Tonight Show used it in their “Class Instruments” bit.

The Three Stooges 75th Anniversary Special (2003)

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January 14

Today’s Genre-ary entry is a special documentary hosted by Woody Harrelson that featured the 75th Anniversary of the Three Stooges. It seemed to be a old TV special from 2003.

The doc would show clips from the history of the Three Stooges as well as talking heads of celebrities such as Michael Chiklis, Cheryl Hines, Tom Arnold, Bobby and Peter Farrelly, Tracy Morgan, and Bridget Fonda.

I was unaware how much Curly was actually not with the Stooges. In my knowledge, the Three Stooges were Larry, Moe and Curly, but I did not know about Curly’s big stroke and death in 1951. The Stooges were active until the early 1970s, with others in that third spot, including Shemp Howard, Joe Besser, and Curley Joe (Joe DeRita).

The slapstick is utterly brilliant among these comedic geniuses. Watching the specificity of the way the Stooges would work together, no matter what threesome would be in the ensemble. The Stooges appealed to everyone with their slaps and pokes and bumps, all corresponding with a strange sound effect.

Woo woo woo woo….

Daily Countdown: TV Show Themes #66

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#66

Batman: The Animated Series

Composed: Danny Elfman. Elfman was inspired by the music from the Tim Burton Batman film from 1989.

The opening theme song for Batman: The Animated Series is an iconic piece of music that absolutley catches the spirit and the feel of this era of Batman. Gone from this version is Adm West and Burt Ward’s campy, humorous versions. The dark and brooding theme built a real energy with the show.

Superbad (2007)

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January 13

When I scheduled Superbad for the comedy Genre-ary, I was really not looking forward to it. It has typically been the type of movie that I hate. I was pushing it off as long as I could.

And then…

I really liked this.

I’m as surprised as anyone.

According to IMDB, “Two co-dependent high school seniors are forced to deal with separation anxiety after their plan to stage a booze-soaked party goes awry.”

I found this surprisingly entertaining, with some excellent writing and witty dialogue. The lines were sharp and hilarious and the situations were over the top, and yet not so much that you roll your eyes.

Jonah Hill, who I have never been a big fan of, was really great as Seth, and he was actually quite deep in this loud and obnoxious character. Historically, this is the type of loud character that irritates me, but, for some reason, this was much better than other films with the same type of character. Hill had great chemistry with Michael Cera, who played Evan. His balance against Hill’s loudness worked well.

The film was also debuts of both Emma Stone and Christopher Mintz-Plasse. Both actors had solid characters and I do think Mintz-Plasse’s run as McLovin was easily the best running joke of the film.

I do think it was too long. I would have liked to have seen about 10-15 minutes trimmed from the film as the middle dragged on a bit. However, the ending of the film was truly charming and hinted at more than just surface story.

The most over-the-top aspect of the film was the police officers, played by Bill Hader and Seth Rogen. I liked them, but there may have been too much of them over the course of the film. Some of these scenes would be the ones I would trim, but they had a wonderful scene near the end of the film with Mintz-Plasse, as that relationship had been built up during the middle.

This is the style of movie that I usually hate. Crude. Drug and alcohol jokes. Sex jokes. It just goes to show you that a film that is intelligently written, with strong characterization and plot that is legitimately funny even without the crude parts, can still be entertaining and well done. With quality, any style can be fun.

Daily Countdown: TV Show Themes #67

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#67

Malcolm in the Middle

Title: “Boss of Me”

Written and Performed: They Might Be Giants

TMBG originally wrote the chorus for a Philadelphia radio contest, using lines like “Who’s gonna guess the dead guy in the envelope,” before adapting it for the show (Google)

The song is a great fit for the tone of Malcom in the Middle, with its wild and chaotic sound.

To Be or Not to Be (1942)

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January 12

It was 1942 when this movie came out and it was a brutal satire of Adolf Hitler and the Nazis in an extremely funny, dark comedy, To Be or Not to Be.

According to IMDB, “During the German occupation of Poland, an acting troupe becomes embroiled in a Polish soldier’s efforts to track down a German spy.“

I was surprised to see the opening credits include Jack Benny, who I knew of as a comedic performer from his radio and television show. I did not know that he was also an actor starring in movies. Benny was truly excellent in this film, and he played against Carole Lombard. The pair worked well together, having a wonderful charm and surprisingly solid chemistry. Their comedic timing was spot on and the dialogue of the film was remarkably clever and entertaining.

It is sad to note that this was the final film in the career of Carole Lombard as she was killed in a plane crash one month after the release of the film.

The film, having been released in the middle of World War II, took its shots at the Nazis and the Gestapo, as well as Hitler himself. It was very funny when the head of the Gestapo kept yelling for Schultz, as it brought me memories of Hogan’s Heroes.

It was very funny as well with all of the “Heil Hitlers” going on when everyone would meet. Such ridiculous fun I had to join in.

It did have several moments where it felt like the movie was going to abandon the comedy and turn into a more action centered film, but it never completely gave up the witticisms. Every moment Jack Benny was on screen, the film was hilarious.

Robert Stack was great as Lt. Stanislav Sobinski, which kicked off the entire story. Other actors in the film included Felix Bressart, Lionel Atwell, Sig Ruman, Stanley Ridges, Tom Dugan, Henry Victor, and Charles Halton.

This is an amazing movie, especially when considering when it was made, and I enjoyed it very much. I watched it on HBO Max.

Daily Countdown: TV Show Themes #68

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#68

The Facts of Life

Composed By: Alan Thicke, Gloria Loring & Al Burton

Performed: Gloria Loring; Charlotte Rae (only season 1)

Spun off from Diff’rent Strokes, The Facts of Life was very successful. Thicke and Loring have done many themes for TV in their careers, believing that the TV theme song is important and a lost art.