Tag Archives: music

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #50

Posted on by

#50

Handy

Title: “Handy”

Album: Mandatory Fun

Released: 2014

Written: Amethyst Amelia Kelly / Charlotte Emma Aitchison / George Astasio / Jason Andrew Pebworth / John Turner / Jonathan Christopher Shave / Kurtis Isaac Mckenzie /Al Yankovic

Parody: Iggy Azalea’s “Fancy” (feat. Charli XCX)

We enter the top 50 of our countdown with this parody of “Fancy.” The video was one of the eight released daily for Mandatory Fun.

Lyrics

First things first, I’m a craftsman (craftsman)
Remodelling is my only passion (it’s my passion)
And I’m the greatest in the business
Want referrals, yo
My clientèle will bear you witness (right, right)
I can help when your door jamb sticks (heh?)
There is nothing in the world I can’t fix (yeah)
I do tiles, I do stone, I do bricks
Call me, I’ll come rushing over with my bag of tricks (bag of tricks)
Where you go when your disposal is rusted (rusted)
Termite problem making you disgusted (yuck)
When your front window is busted (hey, hey, hey)
Just one name that’s always trusted

I’m so handy, you already know
I’ll fix your plumbing when your toilets overflow
I’m so handy, I’ll bring you up to code
When your dishwasher’s about to explode

Now you see that your furnace is needing some service
I’m fully bonded, no need to be nervous
Perhaps you would like a new counter Formica
Maybe I’ll hook up your dish washer combo dryer
But all your pipes are antique
Your water pressure’s too weak
You got an attic full of dry rot
Because your roof sprung a leak
Your fridge is starting to reek
Your hardwood floors really squeak
But don’t you worry I’ll just show you my amazing technique
Now let me glue that, glue that and screw that, screw that
Any random chore you got, well I can do that, do that
Or maybe I’ll just rewire your house for fun
I got 99 problems but a switch ain’t one

I’m so handy, everyone says so
I’ll grout your bathroom, resurface your patio
I’m so handy, I’m the guy to know
When your leaf blower doesn’t blow-oh-oh-oh

Patch the drywall, clean your gutters and mow the lawn
Make that phone call, I’ll install anything you want
Yeah, check my big staple gun, my socket wrenches are second to none
I won’t quit ’til I’m done, don’t even care if I hammer my thumb (ow)

Still rocking my screwdriver
Got the whole world thinking I’m MacGyver
Your heating bills are shocking
I can solve that with some duct tape and some caulking
Your house is a disaster, huh?
Need a guy whose a master with the plaster, huh?
Let me be your stripper
Taking off lacquer, no one does it quicker

I’m so handy, you already know
I’ll beat all price quotes, my hourly rates are low
I’m so handy, you should call this pro
I’m in the phone book and se habla español

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #52

Posted on by

#52

Jerry Springer

Title: “Jerry Springer”

Album: Running With Scissors

Released: 1999

Parody: “One Week” by the Barenaked Ladies

Written: Ed Robertson/Al Yankovic

Lyrics

It’s been one week since we got to see
Cheatin’ lovers and cousins that marry
Five days since they had the show
With the hermaphrodite, the slut and the crack ho
Three days since we heard the tale
About the guy who learned his woman was a she-male
Yesterday it occurred to me
That I’ve been watchin’ a bit too much Jerry Springer

Holy cow, did you see it last week?
Well, they had this one freak
Who sucker-punched his whole family
Do you recall when the brawl became a total free-for-all?
And Jerry’s in the middle tryin’ to be the referee
Hey, see the stripper with the implants?
She likes to lap dance
And date the boyfriend of her mother
Now here comes Jerry’s next guest
And it’s a slugfest
‘Cause it’s her trailer trash brother

Nymphomaniac is back on crack, it’s like When Animals Attack
They all exhibit reprehensible behavior
Hit ’em in the nose, tear off their clothes
Step on their toes, that’s how it goes
They get so violent they have to sign a waiver

They’re always swearin’, cursin’, kickin’ butt and pointin’ blame
On the air? They don’t care, they’ve got no shame
There was one guy who I’m sure felt a little strange
When he found out that his wife had a sex change
They have a tendency to scream and yell constantly
They have a history of ripping off their shirts

It’s been one week since they had the fight
With the Siamese twins and the transvestite
Five days since that awful brawl
They still haven’t got the blood off the wall
It’s been three days since the bitter feud
Between the KKK and that gay Jewish black dude
Yesterday, it finally dawned on me
I’m spendin’ way too much time on that Jerry Springer

Baby, I’ve been sleepin’ with your sister
Oh, which one? All of ’em
Ah, well, I’ve been sleepin’ with your best friend Jake
Yeah? Well, me too, and, I’ve been sleepin’ with your dog Woofie
Woofie, you bi-, well I’m also sleepin’ with your pet goat
That goat doesn’t love you

Once you start watchin’, there’s just no stoppin’
Your brain shuts down, then your IQ’s droppin’
Jerry’s the king of confrontation
He’s a sensation, he puts the sin in syndication
It’s totally worthless, like a bad check
It’s like a train wreck
Don’t want to stare, but you can’t look away
Like Sally Jesse he does talk shows
But with more weirdos
The ratings jumpin’ higher every day

If you’ve seen the show, well then you know
It’s just as low as you can go
The guests are tacky and they’re lacking in their hygiene
And pretty soon some ugly goon comes in the room and then it’s boom
In the face of some unsuspecting drag queen

Well, it’s the kind of show where people scream obscenities
Yankin’ hair, throwin’ chairs at their hubbies
Jerry, Jerry, now the crowd starts their favorite chant
Should I turn off my TV? I just can’t
I have a tendency to watch it religiously
I have a history of taping each one

It’s been one week since the show about
Psycho killers with problems they should work out
Five days since the big surprise
When some losers wife said that she’s still dating twenty guys
Three days since he interviewed
A bunch of psychic porn star midgets who were all nude
Yesterday, it occurred to me
That I’ve been watchin’ a bit too much Jerry Springer

Tired of wastin’ my time on that Jerry Springer
I’ve got way too much class to watch Jerry Springer
Come over here and pull on my finger

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #55

Posted on by

#55

Polkarama!

Title: “Polkarama!”

Writer: Scott Storch / Ray Charles / Carl Allen Sturken / Curtis James Jackson / Chad Hugo / Pharrell Williams / Brandon Flowers / Brian Burton / Robert Hardy / Kanye West / Jaime Gomez / David Jolicoeur / Trevor Smith / Damon Albarn / Scott Weiland / Saul Hudson / Renald J. Richard / Rivers Cuomo / Ray Anthony / Eric Judy / Michael Fratantuno / Thomas Calloway / Terence Yoshiaki Graves / Vada J. Nobles / Dann Michael Gallucci / Christopher Anthony Martin / Nicholas Mccarthy / Ronnie Vannucci / Mark Stoermer / Paul Robert Thomson / Berryman Guy Rupert / Buckland Jonathan Mark / Alisha Quiona Brooks / Champion William / George Pajon Jr. / David G Kushner / Isaac K Brock / Calvin Cordozar Broadus Jr. / Terry Rendal / Al Yankovic / Thomas Werner / Matthew William Sorum / Alexander Paul Kaprano Huntley / Alla Pineda / Christopher Jamie Hewlett / Dave Brent Flowers / Duff Rose Mckagen / Evan A. Rodgers

Album: Straight Outta Lynwood

Released: 2006

Style: Polka/Comedy

Songs: “The Chicken Dance,” “Let’s Get it Started,” “Take Me Out,” “Beverly Hills,” “Speed of Sound,” “Float On,” “Feel Good Inc.,” “Don’t Cha,” “Somebody Told Me,” “Slither,” “Candy Shop,” “Drop It Like It’s Hot,” “Pon de Replay,” “Gold Digger,” and “The Nina Bobina Polka.”

Lyrics

Let’s get it started! (Ha!)
Let’s get it started! (In here!)
Let’s get it started! (Ha!)
Let’s get it started! (In here!)
Let’s get it started! (Ha!)
Let’s get it started! (In here!)
And the bass keeps runnin’, runnin’
And runnin’, runnin’
And runnin’, runnin’,
And runnin’, runnin’,
I say, don’t you know
You say, you don’t know
I say…
Take me out!
I say, you don’t show
Don’t move, time is slow
I say… (gunshot)
Take me out!
Beverly Hills, that’s where I wanna be!
(Gimme! Gimme!)
Living in Beverly Hills
Beverly Hills, rollin’ like a celebrity
(Gimme! Gimme!)
Living in Beverly Hills
And birds go flying at the speed of sound
To show you how it all began
Birds came flying from the underground
If you could see it, then you’d understand
And we’ll all float on, okay
And we’ll all float on
All right already, we’ll all float on
Now don’t you worry, we’ll all float on
All right!
Feel good!
Feel good!
Feel good!
Don’t cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?
Don’t cha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me?
Don’t cha?
Don’t cha?
Don’t cha wish your girlfriend was raw like me?
Don’t cha wish your girlfriend was fun like me?
Don’t cha?
Don’t cha?
Don’t cha, don’t cha, don’t cha?
Somebody told me
You had a boyfriend
Who looked like a girlfriend
That I had in February of last year
It’s not confidential
Well, I got potential
A rushin’ and rushin’ around
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
I’ll take you to the candy shop
I’ll let you lick a lollipop
Go ‘head, girl, don’t you stop
Keep goin’ ’til you hit the spot
Whoa!
(We’ll take you to the candy shop) Yeah!
(For one taste o’ what we got) Uh-huh!
(We’ll have you spending all you got) Come on!
(Keep goin’ ’til you hit the spot) Whoa!
When the pimp’s in the crib, ma
Drop it like it’s hot
Drop it like it’s hot
Drop it like it’s hot
When the pimp’s gonna get at you
Drop it like it’s hot
Drop it like it’s hot
Come, Mr. DJ, song pon de replay
(Come, Mr. DJ, won’t you turn the music up?)
All the gal pon the dance floor, wantin’ some more, what
(Come, Mr. DJ, won’t you turn the music up?)
Hey, mister
Please, Mr. DJ
Tell me if you hear me
Turn the music up!
She take my money
(She take my money)
When I’m in need
(When I’m in need)
Yes, she’s a triflin’ friend indeed (friend indeed)
Well, she’s a gold digger
Way over town (way over town)
That digs on me
Hey! Hey!
Now, I ain’t sayin’ she’s a gold digger
But she ain’t messin’ with no broke, broke
Now, I ain’t sayin’ she’s a gold digger
But she ain’t messin’ with no broke, broke
Get down, girl, go ‘head, get down (I gotta leave)
Get down, girl, go ‘head, get down (I gotta leave)
Get down, girl, go ‘head, get down (I gotta leave)
Get down, girl, go ‘head!
But I
ain’t
sayin’ she’s a
Gold, gold digger
Gold, gold digger
Gold, gold digger
Hey!

Source: Musixmatch

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #56

Posted on by

#56

What is Life

Title: “What is Life”

Written: George Harrison

Album: George Fest: A Night to Celebrate the Music of George Harrison

Style: pop/rock/uptempo soul

Performed: George Fest tribute concert on September 28, 2014

The first song on this list that was not written (at least in part) by Weird Al. Weird Al performed this at the George Fest tribute concert at the Fonda Theater in Los Angeles. Al was one of several other performers covering tracks from the former Beatle. Al also sang on the version of The Traveling Wilburys’ song, “Handle With Care.” “What is Life” was one of my favorite Georege Harrison songs and seeing the live performance by Weird Al was a great addition to it for me.

It is a straight cover of the song, without any comedic undertones.

Lyrics

What I feel, I can’t say
But my love is there for you anytime of day
But if it’s not love that you need
Then I’ll try my best to make everything succeed

Tell me, what is my life without your love
Tell me, who am I without you, by my side

What I know, I can do
If I give my love now to everyone like you
But if it’s not love that you need
Then I’ll try my best to make ev’rything succeed

Tell me, what is my life without your love
Tell me, who am I without you, by my side
Tell me, what is my life without your love
Tell me, who am I without you, by my side

What I feel, I can’t say
But my love is there for you any time of day
But if it’s not love that you need
Then I’ll try my best to make everything succeed

Tell me, what is my life without your love
Tell me, who am I without you, by my side
Oh tell me, what is my life without your love
Tell me, who am I without you, by my side

What is my life without your love
Tell me, who am I without you, by my side

[fade:]
Oh tell me, what is my life without your love
Tell me who am I without you by my side

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #56.5

Posted on by

#56.5

Polka Power

As I was going through the list of songs on the Top 100, I discovered a mistake in the list. Instead of cutting a song that absolutely deserves its spot on the list, I decided to make this special exception for Weird Al and make it a Top 100 with 101 songs in it. Thus, Polka Power becomes the first ever 1/2 entry on our Daily Countdown lists and the only Daily Countdown Two-a-day.

Title: “Polka Power”

Album: Running With Scissors

Released: 1989

Genre: Polka/Comedy

Songs: “The Twelfth Street Rag,” “Wannabe,” “Flagpole Sitta,” “Ghetto Supastar (That Is What You Are),” “Everybody (Backstreet’s Back),” “Walkin’ On the Sun,” “Intergalactic,” “Tubthumping,” “Ray of Light,” “Push,” “Semi-Charmed Life,” “The Dope Show,” “MMMBop,” “Sex and Candy,” “Closing Time,” and “W.A.Y. Moby Polka.”

Lyrics

Yeah, well, I’ll tell ya what I want, what I really really want
(So tell us what ya want, what ya really really want)
I’ll tell ya what I want, what I really really want
(So tell us what ya want, what ya really really want)
I want to ha, I want to ha, I want to ha, I want to ha
I want to really, really, really, want to zigga zigga, ah!
If you want to be my lover, you gotta get with my friends
Make it last forever, friendship never ends
If you want to be my lover, you have got to give
Taking is too easy, but that’s the way it is.
Hey!

I’m not sick, but I’m not well.
And I’m so hot, ’cause I’m in hell.
I’m not sick, but I’m not well.
And it’s a sin to live so well.

Ghetto superstar, that is what you are,
Coming from afar, reaching for the stars.
Run away with me, to another place
We can rely on each other, uh huh
From one corner to another, uh huh

Everybody (yeah)
Rock your body (yeah)
Everybody
Rock your body right.
Backstreet’s back, all right!
All right!

So don’t delay, act now, supplies are running out
But now, if you’re still alive, six to eight years to arrive
And if you follow, there may be a tomorrow
But if the offer’s shun, you might as well be walking on the sun
Might as well be walking on the sun!

Intergalactic planetary, planetary intergalactic
Intergalactic planetary, planetary intergalactic
Intergalactic planetary, planetary intergalactic

I get knocked down, but I get up again,
You’re never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again
You’re never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again
You’re never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again
You’re never gonna keep me down

Quicker than a ray of light
Quicker than a ray of light
Quicker than a ray of light

I want to push you around, well I will, well I will
I want to push you down, well I will, well I will
I want to take you for granted
I want to take you for granted
Yeah, yeah, well I will

I want something else
To get me through this semi-charmed kinda life, baby baby
I want something else
I’m not listening when you say good-bye.

There’s lots of pretty, pretty ones
That want to get you high
But all the pretty, pretty ones
Will leave you low and blow your mind
We’re all stars now in the dope show
We’re all stars now in the dope show

Mmmbop, do floppa do wop
Do be dop ah
Do wap, do zap ah, do
Yeah-ee yeah
Mmmbop, do be ‘zap ah, do wop
Do be dop ah
Do wop, doom zap ah, do

I smell sex and candy here
Who’s that lounging in my chair?
Who’s that casting devious stares in my direction?
Mama, this surely is a dream
Yeah, yeah mama, this surely is a dream
Dig it, yeah mama, this surely is

Closing time
One last call for alcohol
So finish your whiskey or beer
Closing time
You don’t have to go home
But you can’t stay here
I know who I want to take me home
I know who I want to take me home
I know who I want to take me home
Take us home.

‘Cause it’s closing time!
(Yeah it’s closing time)
(We’re talkin’ ’bout closin’ time)
(It’s really closin’ time)
(Hey!)

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #57

Posted on by

#57

The Weird Al Show

Title: “The Weird Al Show”

Written: Al Yankovic

Released: As a theme song for his 1997 Saturday morning children’s TV show.

Album: Running With Scissors

Genre: pop/rock

This fell into the top 20 of the previous list, Top 100 TV Show Themes. When I first was creating that list, I almost didn’t think about it as a theme because it was more of a song than theme. Al has used this as an intro to his concerts since.

Lyrics

Oh, this is a story ’bout a guy named Al
And he lived in a sewer with his hamster pal
But the sanitation workers really didn’t approve
So he packed up his accordion and had to move

To a city in Ohio where he lived in a tree
And he worked in a nasal decongestant factory
And he played on the company bowling team
And every single night he had a strange, recurring dream

Where he was wearing leiderhosen in a vat of sour cream
But that’s really not important to the story

Well, the very next year he met a dental hygenist
With a spatula tattoed on her arm (on her arm)
But he didn’t keep in touch, then he lost her number
Then he got himself a job on a tater tot farm

And he spent his life savings on a split-level cave
20 miles below the surface of the Earth (of the Earth)
And he really makes a mighty fine jelly bean and pickle sandwich
For what it’s worth

Then one day Al was in the forest, trying to get a tan
When he heard the tortured screaming of a funny little man
He was caught in a bear trap and Al set him free
And the guy that he rescued was as grateful as can be

And it turns out he’s a big-shot producer on TV
So he gave Al a contract and what do you know?
Now he’s got his own very Weird Al Show!

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #64

Posted on by

#64

TMZ

Title: “TMZ”

Written: Taylor Swift/Liz Rose/Al Yankovic

Album: Alpocalypse

Released: 2011

Parody: “You Belong with Me” by Taylor Swift

The song is fun as a satirical look at the paparazzi and entertainment news outlets like TMZ, but also take the other side of the fence with celebrities aren’t always great either.

Lyrics

You’re sort of famous
A minor celebrity
And so it only makes sense
The world would be obsessed
with every single thing you do

They’re running ’round
With their camcorders in the night
They lurk impatiently
In hope in that they just might
See something real embarrassing you do

The bad hair day and sweat-stained t-shirt
That’s the story that
They’re gonna feature
With exclusive pics
Of your flabby behind
You think you’re all alone
But that’s right when you’ll find

A bunch of paparazzi
Popping out of nowhere
Cameras in your face
And then suddenly
You’re on TMZ
You’re on TMZ

Following you
When you’re walking down the street
And asking stupid questions
While you’re trying to eat
So you cover your face
Thinking to yourself
“Hey, isn’t this creepy?”

And they’re out there praying
You’ll have a big meltdown
And take ’em on a little car chase
Through this whole town
They’ll be there with you
When you’re going to jail
First on the scene
For every wardrobe fail

You just picked up some transvestite
Seconds later
It’s up on the website
Get a vegas wedding
A quickie divorce
And they’ll be sneaking in
Snapping pictures, of course

And if they ever catch you
Picking your nose
Or stumbling down the street
On a drunken spree
You’re on TMZ
Stalking you, just waiting by your front door
Trailing you through airport security
They’re with TMZ
They’re with TMZ

Oh, let me tell you
It’s getting to the point
Where a famous person can’t
Even get a D.U.I
Or go on a racist rant
Those guys are all around
So you really shouldn’t dare
Go to every club in town
If you’ve lost your underwear

Seems that every single time
A star decides to shave her head
Or ram their car into a tree
They’re on TMZ
If they catch you peeing in the bushes
Later on, that night
Well, I guarantee
You’re on TMZ
You’re on TMZ
You’re on TMZ
Every single celebrity
Knows they’re gonna be
There on TMZ

Source: Musixmatch

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #65

Posted on by

#65

Midnight Star

Title: “Midnight Star”

Written: Al Yankovic

Album: In 3D

Release: 1983

Genre: Pop rock

This upbeat original song is about the type of tabloid newspapers that were such a huge thing during the 1980s.

Lyrics

I was waiting in the express lane
With my twelve items or less
At the checkout counter at the local grocery store
I was only passin’ by

But a paper caught my eye
And I learned a few things
I never knew before
It said

Your pet may be an extra-terrestrial
It said The ghost of Elvis is living in my den
You can learn to cope with stress
And you can beat the IRS

And the Incredible Frog Boy is on the loose again
Ohhh Midnight Star
It’s in the weekly Midnight Star
Aliens from outer space are sleeping in my car
Midnight Star, I wanna know, I wanna know!

Eat jelly doughnuts and lose twenty pounds a day
Hear the story of the man born without a head
And top psychics all agree

That the telephone company

Will have a brand new service that lets you talk to the dead

Ohhh Midnight Star

You can believe it if you read it in the weekly Midnight Star

They’re keeping Hitler’s brain alive inside a jar
Midnight Star, I wanna know, I wanna know!

Midnight Star I wanna know
Ohhh Midnight Star
Well don’t ya know that I read it, I read it in the weekly Midnight Star?

The UFOs have landed, and we’ll tell you where they are
Midnight Star I wanna know I wanna know
Ohhh Midnight Star
Well, you can read all about it in the weekly Midnight Star

You can use your ESP to learn to play guitar
I wanna know I wanna know
(Ahhh Midnight Star)
I wanna know I wanna know

I wanna know I wanna know
(Ahhh Midnight Star)
I wanna know I wanna know

Enquiring minds like mine wanna know
(You can read it you can read it you can read it in the Midnight Star)
I wanna know I wanna know

I wanna know I wanna know
(You can read it you can read it you can read it in the Midnight Star)
I wanna know I wanna know

I wanna know I wanna know
(You can read it you can read it you can read it in the Midnight Star)
I wanna know I wanna know

I wanna know I wanna know
(You can read it you can read it you can read it in the Midnight Star)

Source: Musixmatch

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #66

Posted on by

#66

Perform This Way

Title: “Perform This Way”

Written: Lady Gaga /Jeppe Laursen/ Fernando Garibay/Paul “DJ White Shadow” Blair/Al Yankovic

Album: Alpocalypse

Released: 2011

Parody: “Born This Way” by Lady Gaga

A parody that almost did not happen. Al had sent the parody to Lady Gaga’s people, but they rejected it without Lady Gaga hearing it. When Lady Gaga did hear the parody, she gave her blessing. While Weird Al does not have to get artists permission to do a parody, he always apporached the aritst/company as a sign of respect.

Lyrics

My mama told me when I was hatched
Act like a superstar
Save your allowance, buy a bubble dress
And someday you will go far
Now on red carpets, well, I’m hard to miss
The press follows everywhere I go
I’ll poke your eye out with a dress like this
Back off and enjoy the show!

I’m sure my critics will say it’s a grotesque display
Well they can bite me, baby, I perform this way
I might be wearin’ Swiss cheese or maybe covered with bees
It doesn’t mean I’m crazy, I perform this way (‘from this way)

Ooh, my little monsters pay lots ’cause I perform this way
Baby, I perform this way (perform this way)
Ooh, don’t worry, I’m okay, hey, I just perform this way
I’m not crazy, I perform this way

I’ll be a troll or evil queen
I’ll be a human jelly bean
‘Cause every day is Halloween for me

I’m so completely original
My new look is all the rage
I’ll wrap my small intestines ’round my neck
And set fire to myself on stage
I’ll wear a porcupine on my head
On a W-H-I-M
And for no reason now I’ll sing in French
Excusez-moi, qui a PT (express yourself)

Got my straight jacket today, its made of gold lame
No, not because I’m crazy, I perform this way
I strap prime rib to my feet, cover myself with raw meat
I’ll bet you’ve never seen a skirt steak worn this way

Don’t be offended when you see
My latest pop monstrosity
I’m strange, weird, shocking, odd, bizarre
I’m Frankenstein, I’m Avatar
There’s nothing too embarrassing
I’ll honestly do anything
But wear white after Labor Day
‘Cause baby, I perform this way

Hope you won’t think it’s cliche if I go nude today
Don’t call the cops, now, baby, I perform this way
No reason I should regret all the attention I get
I’m not completely crazy, I perform this way, yeah

I perform this way-hey, I perform this way-hey
I’m always deviating from the norm this way-hey
I perform this way-hey, I perform this way-hey
I’m really not insane, I just perform this way-hey

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #68

Posted on by

#68

Polka Your Eyes Out

Title: “Polka Your Eyes Out”

Album: Off the Deep End

Release: 1992

Style: Polka/Comedy

Songs: “Cradle of Love,” “Tom’s Diner,” “Love Shack,” “Clarinet Polka,” “Pump Up the Jam,” “Losing My Religion,” “Unbelievable,” “Do Me!,” “Enter Sandman,” “Humpty Dance,” “Cherry Pie,” “Miss You Much,” “I Touch Myself,” “Dr. Feelgood,” “Ice Ice Baby,” “Ear Booger Polka.”

Another polka medley appers in the Top 100.

Lyrics

Rock the cradle of love. Rock the cradle of love
Yes, the cradle of love
Don’t rock easy, it’s true
Rock the cradle of love
I rocked the cradle of love
Yes, the cradle of love
Don’t rock easy, it’s true

Doo doo doo doo doo doodoo doo doo doo doo doo doo doodoo doo
(Doo doo doo doo doo doodoo doo doo doo doo doo doo doodoo doo)

The Love Shack is a little old place where
We can get together
Love Shack, baby
(Love Shack, baby, Love Shack)
Hey!

Pump up the jam (hey!). Pump up the jam (hey!)
Pump up the jam, pump it up!

That’s me in the corner
That’s me in the spotlight, losing my religion
Trying to keep a view
And I don’t know if I can to it
Oh no, I’ve said too much
I haven’t said enough

The things you say
Your purple prose just gives you away
The things you say
You’re unbelieveable
(Oh!)

Do me, baby. Do me, baby
You can do me in the morning, you can do me in the night
You can do me when you want to do me
Yodalodaladyhoo!

Exit light
Enter night
Take my hand
Off to never never land

The Humpty Dance is your chance to do the Hump
Do me, baby
Do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump
Do me, baby
Do the Humpty Hump, come on and do the Humpty Hump

She’s my cherry pie
Put a smile on your face ten miles wide
Look so good, make a grown man cry
Sweet cherry pie-yi-yi
Woo!

Drum solo!

I miss you so much (M-O-I miss you so much)
I really miss you much (M-I-S-S you so much)
I miss you so much (M-O-I miss you so much)
I really miss you much

Hey, I don’t want anybody else
When I think about you I touch myself
Oh, I don’t want anybody else
Oh no, oh no, oh no no no

He’s the one they call Dr. Feelgood
He’s the one that makes you fell all right
He’s the one they call Dr. Feelgood
He’s gonna be your Frankenstein

Let’s kick it!
If you got a problem, (yo!) I’ll solve it
Check out the beat while the DJ revolves it
Ice ice baby
Ice ice baby… Word to your mother!
Ice ice baby
Ice ice baby forever
I’ll be your ife… ice… baby!
Hey!

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #71

Posted on by

#71

Polka Party

Title: “Polka Party”

Album: Polka Party

Released: 1986

Genre: Polka/Comedy

Songs: “Sledgehammer,” “Sussudio,” “Party All the Time,” “Say You, Say Me,” “Freeway of Love,” “What You Need,” “Harlem Shuffle,” “Venus,” “Nasty,” “Rock Me Amadeus,” “Shout,” “Papa Don’t Preach.”

I listened to this one forever during my college days.

Lyrics

You could have a big dipper
Going up and down all around the bends
You could have a bumper car bumping
This amusement never ends

I wanna be your sledgehammer
Why don’t you call my name?
Oh, let me be your sledgehammer
This will be my testimony, yeah, yeah

There’s a girl that’s been on my mind all the time
Su-su-sudio, oh-oh
Now she don’t even know my name
But I think she likes me just the same
Su-su-sudio, whoa-oh

And my girl wants to party all the time
Party all the time, party all the time
My girl wants to party all the time, party all the time
She parties all the time

Say you, say me
Say it for always, that’s the way it should be
Say you, say me
Say it together naturally

We’re going riding on the freeway of love
Wind’s against our back
We’re going riding on the freeway of love
In a big Cadillac

That’s why you need, ooh
That’s why this what you need, I’ll give you what you need

Yah, yah, yah, do the Harlem polka, everybody now
Yah, yah, yah, do the Harlem polka

She’s got it, yeah baby, she’s got it
Well, I’m your Venus, I’m your fire
What’s your desire?

Nasty, nasty boys don’t mean a thing
Oh, you nasty boys
Nasty, nasty boys don’t ever change
Oh, you nasty boys

I like this part

Ooh, rock me Amadeus
Ooh, rock me Amadeus
Ooh, rock me Amadeus, ooh

Shout, shout, let it all out
These are the things I can do without, come on
I’m talking to you, come on

Please papa don’t preach, I’m in trouble deep
Papa don’t preach, I’ve been losing sleep
But I’ve made up my mind, I’m keeping my baby
Oh, I’m gonna keep my baby
I’m gonna keep my baby

Keep my baby
Keep my baby
Keep my baby
Hey

Source: Musixmatch

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #74

Posted on by

#74

Gotta Boogie

Title: “Gotta Boogie”

Written: Al Yankovic

Album: “Weird Al” Yankovic

Release: 1983

Style: Dance/disco

Lots of funny puns involving boogers. What more can you ask? This was a wonderful surprise the first time hearing Weird Al’s debut album, as I do not remember hearing it on the Dr. Demento show. I did see Al perform this live in concert at one of the times I saw him play.

Lyrics

Gotta boogie
Gotta boogie
Gotta boogie
Gotta boogie
I gotta boogie (gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie (gotta boogie)
I gotta boogie (gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie on my finger and I can’t shake it off

Well, I went out to a party just the other night
I was jammin’ to the music, I was feelin’ alright
I was burning up the floor like a disco maniac
When my woman said, “Baby, why’s your hand behind you back?”

Gotta boogie (gotta boogie)
I said boogie (gotta boogie)
I gotta boogie (gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie on my finger and I can’t shake it off

I can’t pick it off (uh uh)
I can’t flick it off (uh uh)
I sure ain’t gonna lick it off (oh no)
So I guess I’m gonna have to learn to live with it

I gotta boogie (gotta boogie, uh huh, he’s gotta boogie)
I gotta boogie (gotta boogie, uh huh, he’s gotta boogie)
I gotta boogie (gotta boogie, uh huh, he’s gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie on my finger and I can’t shake it off

Gotta boogie
(Boogie)
Hey, you wanna boogie? (No man, I don’t wanna boogie)
Wanna boogie? (Get that boogie out of my face)
Do any of you wanna boogie? (No!)

Gotta boogie on my finger
Gotta boogie on my finger
Gotta boogie on my finger and I can’t shake it off

Source: Musixmatch

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #75

Posted on by

#75

Hooked on Polkas

Title: “Hooked on Polkas”

Album: Dare to Be Stupid

Style: Polka/Comedy

Released: 1985

Songs in medley: “Twelfth Street Rag,” “State of Shock,” “Sharp Dressed Man,” “What’s Love Got to Do with It,” “Method of Modern Love,” “Owner of a Lonely Heart,” “We’re Not Gonna Take It,” “99 Luftballons” (sung in German), “Footloose,” “The Reflex,” “Bang Your Head (Metal Health),” and “Relax”.

Lyrics

You’re takin’ to me good,
Just like you know you should.
You get me on my knees,
Please, baby, please.


She looks so great, every time I see her face.
She put me in a state (ooh, state of shock)


Top coat. Top hat.
I don’t worry, ’cause my wallet’s fat.
Black shades. White glove.
Lookin’ sharp. Lookin’ for love.
They come a-runnin’ just as fast as they can,
‘Cause every girl’s crazy ’bout a sharp-dressed man, hey!

Whoo! Ah ha!


Oh, what’s love, got to do, got to do with it?
What’s love but a second-hand emotion?
What’s love got to do, got to do with it?
Who needs a heart, when a heart can be broken?


M E T H O D O F L O V E,
It’s the method of modern love.


Owner of a lonely heart.
Owner of a lonely heart,
Much better than the
Owner of a broken heart.
Owner of a lonely heart.


We’re not gonna take it. No!
We ain’t gonna take it.
We’re not gonna take it, any more.


Neun und neunzig luftballons
Auf ihrem Weg zum Horizont.
Denkst du vielleicht Grad an mich.
Dann singe ich ein Lied fur dich.


Now I gotta cut loose. Footloose.
Kick off my Sunday shoes.
Please! Louise! Pull me off-a my knees.
Jack! Get back! Come on, before we crack!
Loose! You’re blues. Ev’ry body cut footloose!


So why don’t you use it.
Try not to bruise it.
Find time, don’t lose it.


Bang your head.
Metal health’ll drive ya mad.
Bang your head.
Metal health’ll drive ya mad.


Relax, don’t do it.
When you wanna go to it.
Relax, don’t do it.
When you wanna come.
Relax, don’t do it.
When you wanna sock it to it.
Relax, don’t do it.
When you wanna come.
When you wanna come.
When you want to come.

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #81

Posted on by

#81

Bohemian Polka

Title: “Bohemian Polka”

Written: Freddie Mercury/Al Yankovic

Album: Alapalooza

Release: 1993

Genre: Polka/Comedy

Bohemian Polka is the only polka Al ever put together for an album that was just a cover of a single song, Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen. I can remember the shock when first playing the song and seeing how the polka would not feature a group of songs from a variety of artists.

Lyrics

Is this the real life
Is this just fantasy
Caught in a landslide
No escape from reality
Open your eyes
Look up to the skies and see
I’m just a poor boy, I need no sympathy
‘Cause I’m easy come, easy go
Little high, little low
Anyway the wind blows, doesn’t really matter to me
To me

Mama, just killed a man
Put a gun against his head
Pulled my trigger, now he’s dead
Mama, life had just begun
But now I’ve gone and thrown it all away
Mama, ooo
Didn’t mean to make you cry
If I’m not back again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters

Too late, my time has come
Sends shivers down my spine
Body’s aching all the time
Goodbye everybody – I’ve got to go
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth
Mama, ooo
I don’t want to die
I sometimes wish I’d never been born at all

I see a little silhouetto of a mam
Scaramouch, scaramouch, will you do the Fandango
Thunderbolt and lightning – very, very frightening me
Galileo, Galileo
Galileo, Galileo
Galileo figaro – Magnifico… Hey! Hey! Hey!
I’m just a poor boy, nobody loves me
He’s just a poor boy from a poor family
Spare him his life from this monstrosity
Easy come, easy go, will you let me go?
Bismillah! No, we will not let you go – let him go
Bismillah! We will not let you go – let him go
Bismillah! We will not let you go – let him go
Will not let you go – let him go
Will not let you go – let him go
No, no, no, no, no no no no no!

Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go
Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me, for me
For me

So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye
So you think you can love me and leave me to die
Oh, baby – Can’t do this to me, baby
Just gotta get out – just gotta get right outta here

Nothing really matters
Anyone can see
Nothing really matters
Nothing really matters to me Anyway the wind blows – Hey!

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #83

Posted on by

#83

Theme from Rocky XIII (The Rye or the Kaiser)

Title: “Theme from Rocky XIII (The Rye or the Kaiser)”

Album: Weird Al Yankovic In 3D

Release: 1982

Written:  Jim Peterik/Frankie Sullivan/Al Yankovic

Parody: “The Eye of the Tiger” by Survivor

Style: Rock/Movie Songs

One of the more unknown Al parodies from his second major album. This is one of the early songs to show how clever Al could be with his lyrics and yet one more song that he wrote involving food.

Lyrics

Fat and weak, what a disgrace
Guess the champ got too lazy
Ain’t gonna fly now, he’s just takin’ up space
Sold his gloves, threw his eggs down the drain

But he’s no bum, he works down the street
He bought the neighborhood deli
Back on his feet, now he’s choppin’ up meat
Come inside, maybe you’ll hear him say

Try the rye or the kaiser
They’re on special tonight
If you want, you can have an appetizer
You might like our salami, and the liver’s all right
And they’d really go well with the rye
Or the kaiser

Never eats while on the job
He heard it’s good to stay hungry
But he makes a pretty mean shish kabob
Have a taste, they were made fresh today

Try the rye or the kaiser or the wheat or the white
Maybe I can suggest an appetizer
Stay away from the tuna, it smells funny tonight
But you just can’t go wrong with the rye
Or the kaiser

So today, his deli comes first
Still he dreams of his past days of glory
Goes in the back and beats up on the liverwurst
All the while you can still hear him say

It’s the rye or the kaiser, it’s the thrill of one bite
Let me please be your catering advisor
If you want substitutions, I won’t put up a fight
You can have your roast beef on the rye
Or the kaiser

The rye or the kaiser

The rye or the kaiser

The rye or the kaiser

Source: Musixmatch