Tag Archives: writing

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #17

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#17

The North Korea Polka (Please Don’t Nuke Us)

Title: “The North Korea Polka (Please Don’t Nuke Us)”

Album: None

Appeared: HBO’s Last Week Tonight with John Oliver

Date: August 2017

Written: Al Yankovic

Genre: Polka

Topic: “John Oliver noted that North Korea has a surprising cultural affinity for the accordion. To take advantage of this, he brought in Yankovic and his signature accordion to ”communicate’ with the nation” –Entertainment Tonight

What an awesome surprise this was. Weird Al, who usually does medley polkas, provided an actual original song about North Korea. “The song was created as a satirical de-escalation plea during a time of heightened nuclear tensions between the U.S. and North Korea.” -www.weirdal.com.

Lyrics

Would you annihilate us if you had the chance?
That’s such an antisocial thing to do
You’ve got us crapping our collective pants
May I suggest you take it down a notch or two

We’re not exactly sure why you’re upset
Did that Seth Rogen movie make you super mad?
You’d like us if you got to know us i bet
We’re mostly harmless decent people, hey we’re really not so bad

My point is!
Please don’t nuke us North Korea
Right now we’re all a little tense
Believe me!
We don’t hate you
Frankly we don’t even think that much about you, no offense

Now you might call us “bloodthirsty dogs”
But that metaphor’s not very apt
Were just a bunch of simple fidget-spinning goofy dorks
Who probably couldn’t find your country on a map

No we’re not savages or cannibals
Well maybe just a really really really small percent
So I think it would be best if you’d knock off those missile tests
Don’t turn us into cinder while we’re swiping right on Tinder
Don’t jump start Armageddon or our beds will soon be wetter
Won’t you think this through for a moment please
Now why would you bomb our nice celebrities?
Oh why in the world would you kill Tom Hanks?
Cause nobody doesn’t like Tom Hanks!

So!
Please don’t nuke us North Korea
That would seriously ruin our day
Remember!
We’re not evil psychotic monsters
No matter what the news may say
We’re just those goofballs from the U.S.A!
(Please don’t nuke us)
(Please don’t nuke us)
(Please don’t nuke us)
Hey!

https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/weirdalyankovic/thenorthkoreapolkapleasedontnukeus.html

Bambi: The Reckoning (2025)

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June 11

Day 11

I have had a pretty good run with the 2026 June Swoon 5. Ten really good, enjoyable movies so far. It is sad that had to come to an end, but I kind of expected it.

I have three movies I am going to today at Cinemark and so I needed a shorter movie. I just did a short yesterday and I wanted to avoid another right now. I found a film on Peacock that was only 1 hour and 20 minutes, that would work for the schedule. Unfortunately, it was Bambi: The Reckoning.

I have seen several of these movies. Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey, Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey 2, and Screamboat. Of those, I did not hate Screamboat as much as I hated the Winnie the Pooh movies, but it was not good by any stretch.

I gave it my best shot to come into this movie with an open mind, but that was wiped away early on.

According to IMDB, “A car wreck strands a mother and son in the deep woods where a mutated, vengeful deer stalks them. As local hunters and an obsessive grandmother converge, the forest becomes a bloody arena for a grieving creature’s primal rage.”

The writing on this is atrocious. I’m not sure that there is one redeeming character in the film. I was openly rooting for Bambi to kill these miserable excuses for human beings. Funnily enough, Bambi did not directly kill several of them.

The dialogue was basically yelling other characters’ names.

When most of these kills are funnier than scarier, you know you’ve got a problem. My favorite was the guy who got dragged behind a van as they were trying to escape from Bambi. What a completely random death.

There are some unintendedly funny moments and so little made sense. I could not bring myself to give this the “So Bad, It’s Good” ranking because there was just nothing good about it. Maybe if the RiffTrax crew would riff this, there might be something worth the time.

This may not sink to the depths of Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey or its sequel, but it was nowhere near Screamboat. That is saying something.

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #18

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#18

Happy Birthday

Title: “Happy Birthday”

Album: “Weird Al” Yankovic

Released: 1983

Written: Al Yankovic

Style: New wave/Punk rock pastiche

Topic: Wishing happy birthday while discussing all the worst things on the earth.

I love this song. I play it every year for my birthday and I have sent it to several people over Facebook or other social media platform.

“And a pinch to grow an inch!”

Lyrics

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you

Well, it’s time to celebrate your birthday, it happens every year
We’ll eat a lot of broccoli and drink a lot of beer
You should be good and happy that there’s something you can eat
A million people every day are starving in the street

Your daddy’s in the gutter with the wretched and the poor
Your mama’s in the kitchen with a can of Cycle Four
There’s garbage in the water
There’s poison in the sky
I guess it won’t be long before we’re all gonna die

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you

Well, what’s the matter little friend? You think this party is the pits?
Enjoy it while you can, we’ll soon be blown to bits
The monkeys in the Pentagon are gonna cook our goose
Their finger’s on the button, all they need is an excuse

It doesn’t take a military genius to see
We’ll all be crispy critters after World War III
There’s nowhere you can run to, nowhere you can hide
When they drop the big one, we all get fried
Come on, boys and girls, sing along, okay?

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you (wow!)

Well, there’s a punk in the alley and he’s looking for a fight
There’s an Arab on the corner buying everything in sight
There’s a mother in the ghetto with another mouth to feed
Seems that everywhere you look today there’s misery and greed

I guess you know the earth is gonna crash into the sun
But that’s no reason why we shouldn’t have a little fun
So if you think it’s scary, if it’s more than you can take
Just blow out the candles and have a piece of cake

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you (wow!)

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you

And a pinch to grow an inch!

Source: Musixmatch

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #20

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#20

It’s All About the Pentiums

Title: “It’s All About the Pentiums”

Album: Running With Scissors

Released: 1999

Parody: “It’s All About the Benjamins” by Puff Daddy

Written: Sean Combs / Kimberly Jones / David Styles / Sean Jacobs / Jason Phillips / Christopher Wallace / Terry M. Etlinger / Linda Laurie / Deric Angelettie / Al Yankovic

Genre: Rap/Comedy

Topic: Computers

We enter the Top 20 of the Top 100 with one of Weird Al’s first examples of his skill in rapping.

Lyrics

It’s all about the Pentiums, baby
Uhh, uh-huh, yeah
Uhh, uh-huh, yeah
It’s all about the Pentiums, baby
It’s all about the Pentiums, baby
It’s all about the Pentiums! (it’s all about the Pentiums, baby)
It’s all about the Pentiums! (it’s all about the Pentiums, baby)
Yeah

What y’all wanna do?
Wanna be hackers? Code crackers? Slackers
Wastin’ time with all the chatroom yakkers?
Nine to five, chillin’ at Hewlett Packard?
Workin’ at a desk with a dumb little placard?
Yeah, payin’ the bills with my mad programming skills
Defraggin’ my hard drive for thrills
I got me a hundred gigabytes of RAM
I never feed trolls and I don’t read spam
Installed a T1 line in my house
Always at my PC, double-clickin’ on my mizouse
Upgrade my system at least twice a day
I’m strictly plug-and-play, I ain’t afraid of Y2K
I’m down with Bill Gates, I call him Money for short
I phone him up at home and I make him do my tech support
It’s all about the Pentiums, what?
You’ve gotta be the dumbest newbie I’ve ever seen
You’ve got white-out all over your screen
You think your Commodore 64 is really neato
What kinda chip you got in there, a Dorito?
You’re usin’ a 286? Don’t make me laugh
Your Windows boots up in what, a day and a half?
You could back up your whole hard drive on a floppy diskette
You’re the biggest joke on the Internet
Your database is a disaster
You’re waxin’ your modem, tryin’ to make it go faster
Hey fella, I bet you’re still livin’ in your parents’ cellar
Downloadin’ pictures of Sarah Michelle Gellar
And postin’ “Me too!” like some brain-dead AOL-er
I should do the world a favor and cap you like Old Yeller
You’re just about as useless as jpegs to Hellen Keller

It’s all about the Pentiums! (it’s all about the Pentiums, baby)
It’s all about the Pentiums! (it’s all about the Pentiums, baby)
It’s all about the Pentiums! (it’s all about the Pentiums, baby)
It’s all about the Pentiums! (it’s all about the Pentiums, baby)

Now, what y’all wanna do?
Wanna be hackers? Code crackers? Slackers
Wastin’ time with all the chatroom yakkers?
Nine to five, chillin’ at Hewlett Packard?

Uh, uh, loggin’ in now
Wanna run wit my crew, hah?
Rule cyberspace and crunch numbers like I do?
They call me the king of the spreadsheets
Got ’em all printed out on my bedsheets
My new computer’s got the clocks, it rocks
But it was obsolete before I opened the box
You say you’ve had your desktop for over a week?
Throw that junk away, man, it’s an antique
Your laptop is a month old? Well that’s great
If you could use a nice, heavy paperweight
My digital media is write-protected
Every file inspected, no viruses detected
I beta tested every operating system
Gave props to some, and others? I dissed ’em
While your computer’s crashin’, mine’s multitaskin’
It does all my work without me even askin’
Got a flat-screen monitor forty inches wide
I believe that your says “Etch-A-Sketch” on the side
In a 32-bit world, you’re a 2-bit user
You’ve got your own newsgroup, alt.total-loser
Your motherboard melts when you try to send a fax
Where’d you get your CPU, in a box of Cracker Jacks?
Play me online? Well, you know that I’ll beat you
If I ever meet you I’ll control-alt-delete you
What? What? What? What? What?

It’s all about the Pentiums! (it’s all about the Pentiums, baby)
It’s all about the Pentiums! (it’s all about the Pentiums, baby)
It’s all about the Pentiums! (it’s all about the Pentiums, baby)
It’s all about the Pentiums! (it’s all about the Pentiums, baby)

Now, what y’all wanna do?
Wanna be hackers? Code crackers? Slackers
Wastin’ time with all the chatroom yakkers?
Nive to five, chillin’ at Hewlett Packard?
What?

Source: Musixmatch

The Pout-Pout Fish

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The animated film The Pout-Pout Fish dropped on Amazon Prime recently. It was one of the films I did not see in the theaters, so I streamed it on Prime.

I’ll get this out of the way. The animation was excellent. It looked great, and the designs of the fish were clever and fun.

That was about all I liked about this one.

According to IMDB, “Living on a rundown shipwreck, Mr. Fish one day discovers a hyperactive young sea dragon Pip – who had mistaken his home for a junkyard – pilfering his belongings. The heated argument that ensues leaves both their houses in ruin. But there is hope. Embarking on a seemingly impossible quest in search of the mythical “Shimmer” to grant them a wish, there’s only one problem: someone else is on the hunt.“

I am afraid that this movie just never hit with me. I had a lot of trouble with some of the physics of the story. It seemed like they forgot at times that there was water around everyone. Things seemed to fall like they would without water and it bugged me.

Then, the character of Pip was just about as annoying as I have ever heard in animation. I was done with this character very early as well.

The film was very predictable and overall bland. Nick Offerman, who I have always enjoyed, just did not seem to fit the voice of the character of Mr. Fish.

I thought the trio of pink dolphins (voiced by Amy Sedaris) were the best part of the film, because you do not usually see dolphins as antagonists.

This one was a disappointment. I did not enjoy watching it and it felt like it took forever, even though it wasn’t that long time wise. I thought the ending was okay, but by that point, I was checked out.

2.2 stars

John Candy: I Like Me (2025)

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June 7

Day 7

Today’s June Swoon 5 film was a documentary on Amazon Prime from last year that looked at the life and career of one of the most beloved actors/comedians of the past forty years, John Candy.

The doc started off with Bill Murray trying to come up with something bad to say about John Candy, and wishing the producers luck in their investigation to find some dirt on the man. It was a real funny kick off to the show and did a great job of pointing out how universally beloved men John Candy was.

There were a litany of stars who had nothing but amazing things to say about John Candy including Tom Hanks, Dan Aykroyd, Catherine O’Hara, Macaulay Culkin, Martin Short, Eugene Levy, Dave Thomas, Andrea Martin, Steve Martin, Conan O’Brien, and Mel Brooks.

The doc does a great job of outlining how the death of John Candy’s father (when John was 5 years old) affected him as an adult, and how his behavior of drinking, smoking, eating led to his early death at 43.

It also showed what a lovely human being John Candy was and how much success he had as an actor, starting off with SCTV and ending as a movie star.

The doc also talked with John Candy’s family, his wife, his brothers, his son, and his daughter. They talked about the close relationship John Candy had developed with John Hughes, and how Candy wound up in 9 films from the director.

I liked John Candy, but I would never say that I was a huge fan of his, but I found myself tearing up at the end of the documentary, which tells you how well director Colin Hanks and the rest did with this doc. The story of them closing down a freeway in LA for John Candy’s funeral procession was amazing.

The doc is available on Amazon Prime and it moves at a brisk clip, moving through his way-too-short life and career. It is wonderful when you can look back on a person’s career and see only the good.

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs#23

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#23

Angry White Boy Polka

Title: “Angry White Boy Polka”

Album: Poodle Hat

Released: 2003

Genre: Polka/Comedy

Written: Alfred Matthew Yankovic / Jerry Allan Horton / Tobin Esperance / Dave Buckner / Jacoby Dakota Shaddix

Songs included: “Last Resort,” “Chop Suey,” “Get Free,” “Hate To Say I Told You So,” “Fell In Love With A Girl,” “Last Nite,” “Down With The Sickness,” “Renegades Of Funk,” “My Way,” “Outside,” “Bawitdaba,” “Youth Of The Nation,” and “The Real Slim Shady.”

I am not sure that I had ever heard any of these songs prior to the polka, so it is always fun when I happen to hear a lyric from a song and i think, “Hey, that’s Weird Al’s song!”

Lyrics

Cut my life into pieces
This is my last resort
Suffocation, no breathing
Don’t give a- if I cut my arm bleeding
This is my last resort

‘Cause I’m losing my sight, losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I’m fine
Losing my sight, losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I’m fine
Nothing’s all right, nothing is fine
I’m running and a-crying

Wake up (Wake up)
Grab a brush and put a little make-up
Hide the scars to fade away the shakeup
Why’d you leave the keys upon the table?
Here you go create another fable
You wanted to
Grab a brush and put a little makeup
You wanted to
Hide the scars to fade away the shakeup
You wanted to
Why’d you leave the keys upon the table?
You wanted to
I don’t think you trust
In my self-righteous suicide
I cry when angels deserve to die, die, die
D-d-die die die die die

Hey
I’m gonna get free
I’m gonna get free
I’m gonna get free
Ride into the sun
She never loved me
She never loved me
She never loved me
Why should anyone?
Come here, come here, come here I’ll take your photo for ya
Come here, come here, come here Drive you around the corner
Come here, come here, come here You know you really oughta
Come here, come here, come here Move out to California

Do what I want ’cause I can
If I don’t because I wanna
Be ignored by the stiff and the bored
Because I’m gonna
Hate to say I told you so (all right)
Do believe I told you so
Now it’s all out and you knew
‘Cause I wanted to

Fell in love with a girl
I fell in love at once and almost completely
She’s in love with the world
But sometimes these feelings can be so misleading
Can’t think of anything to do
Yeah, my left brain knows that all love is fleeting
She’s just looking for something new
Yeah, I said it once before but it bears repeating, now

Last night, she said
“Oh baby, don’t you feel so down” (feel so down)
“When you turn me off
“When I feel left out”
So I (what’d you do?)
Well, I turned around (right around)
“Oh, baby, gonna be alright” (gonna be alright)
It was a great big lie (big old lie)
‘Cause I left that night
Yeah

Ooh ah ah ah ah
Ooh ah ah ah ah
Get up
Come on get down with the sickness
Get up
Come on get down with the sickness
Get up
Come on get down with the sickness
Open up your hate and let it flow into me
Get up
Come on get down with the sickness
You mother get up
Come on get down with the sickness
Get up
Come on get down with the sickness
Madness is the gift that has been given to me

We’re the renegades of funk
We’re the renegades of funk
We’re the renegades of funk
We’re the renegades of funk
This time I’m’a let it all come out
This time I’m’a stand up and shout
I’m a do things my way
It’s my way
My way or the highway
This time I’m’a let it all come out
This time I’m’a stand up and shout
I’m a do things my way
It’s my way
Or the highway

But I’m on the outside
I’m looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
‘Cause inside you’re ugly
Ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you

Bawitdaba da bang da dang diggy diggy
Diggy said the boogie said up jump the boogie
Bawitdaba da bang da dang diggy diggy
Diggy said the boogie said up jump the boogie

We are, we are
The youth of the nation
We are, we are
The youth of the nation

We are, we are
The youth of the nation
We are the youth of the nation Hey

I’m Slim Shady, yes I’m the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won’t the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up
Please stand up

I’m Slim Shady, yes I’m the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won’t the real Slim Shady please
Please, please stand up

Slim Shady won’t you please stand up?
(Stand up Shady)(Stand up)
(Stand up Shady)(Stand up)
Shady, won’t you please stand up?
Hey

Source: Musixmatch

Good Night, and Good Luck: Live From Broadway (2005)

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June 5

Day 5

I wish we got more of this.

This was originally a live broadcast of the Broadway play, Good Night and Good Luck on CNN and CNN International. I wish that there were more examples of this form, movie recorded as the Broadway play, so we could get more of an exposure to this type of entertainment.

I have been excited to see this since I put it on the Netflix queue and i figured the June Swoon 5 would be a perfect place for it.

This play showed the lead up and eventual confrontation between the junior senator from Wisconsin, Joseph McCarthy and CBS newsman Edward R. Murrow, as well as the journalists and news people behind the scenes at CBS.

I found this to be completely enthralling and totally thrilling. The play used videos of Joseph McCarthy as well as other important people of the time to help illuminate the story.

George Clooney starred as Murrow and he was excellent. A personal favorite of mine was also here, Clark Gregg, who was well known as Agent Coulson in the MCU. He played newscaster Don Hollenbeck. There was a scene in this play between Clooney and Gregg that was just amazing and showed off Gregg’s skills tremendously.

Glenn Fleschler played Fred Friendly and his relationship with Murrow was another part of this story. It was some of the best dialogue you will hear and consistently was both funny and poignant.

The only thing that was distracting for me was that fact that every time the character of Joe Wershba, played by Carter Hudson, spoke, it sounded like John Ratzenberger. That did not take away from his strong performance in the play, but it was something that I thought of every time he spoke.

I wish there were more of these type of films. Not just adaptations of stage plays, but actual stage plays as they are presented on Broadway. I would definitely go see something like this in a theater.

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #24

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#24

Ebay

Title: “Ebay”

Album: Poodle Hat

Released: 2003

Parody: “I Want It That Way” by Backstreet Boys

Written: Martin Karl Sandberg / Andreas Michael Carlsson / Al Yankovic

Style: Pop/Comedy

Topic: an obsessive shopper and the online website, eBay.

The song ends with several “EEEEE”s after the ending of the official lyrics. It is a very funny bit and the parody hits too close to home as I do love me some eBay.

Lyrics

Yeah

A used pink bathrobe
A rare mint snow globe
A Smurf TV tray
I bought on eBay

My house is filled with this crap
Shows up in bubble wrap
Most every day
What I bought on eBay

Tell me why I need another pet rock
Tell me why I got that elf alarm clock
Tell me why I bid on Shatner’s old toupee
They had it on eBay

I’ll buy your knick-knack
Just check my feedback
A plus-plus, they all say
They love me on eBay

Gonna buy a slightly damaged golf bag
Gonna buy some beanie babies, new with tag
From some guy I’ve never met in Norway
Found him on Ebay

I am the type who is liable to snipe you
With two seconds left to go, whoa
Got PayPal or Visa, whatever’ll please ya
As long as I’ve got the dough

I’ll buy your Tchotchkes
Sell me your watch, please
I’ll buy (I’ll buy, I’ll buy, I’ll buy)
I’m highest bidder

Junk keeps arriving in the mail (now, yeah)
From that worldwide garage sale (Dukes of Hazard ashtray)
Hey, a Dukes of Hazard ashtray (oh, yeah)
I bought it on eBay

Wanna buy a Pac-Man Fever lunchbox
Wanna buy a case of Vintage tube socks
Wanna buy a Kleenex used by Dr. Dre (used by Dr. Dre)
Found it on eBay

Wanna buy that Farrah Fawcet poster
Pez dispensers and a toaster
Don’t know why
The kind of stuff you’d throw away (away I throw)
I’ll buy on eBay

What I bought on eBay

Source: Musixmatch

Widow’s Bay S1 E8

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Spoilers

“Your Baggage”

With the corpse of Richard Warren officially gone, everything in Widow’s Bay is all peaches and flowers, right?

Maybe not.

Tom went to his house to deal with his son, Evan, who had all the pictures of his mom and wanted answers. Tom gave them to him, even though he did not want to do so. The father and son had some moments together when Tom gave Evan Red Sox tickets, signaling that they could leave the island.

We all knew that last week was too good to be true and, when Wyck showed up at Toms door with the message that it was not yet over, Tom’s face revealed how crushed he was, certainly because he was just making plans with his son to go to Boston for the weekend.

While this was going down, Patricia was being chased by the Boogeyman, the serial killer who killed a bunch of high school girls years before, and who tormented Patricia (though no one believed that this happened).

The Boogeyman pursued Patricia across Widow’s Bay in grand Michael Myers fashion. Patricia eventually dowsed him with gasoline and set him on fire. Unfortunately, the gas station attendant put him out with a fire extinguisher, thinking that he was doing the right thing. He learned his error as the Boogeyman grabbed him by the throat and threw him away violently.

Luckily, Patricia was able to shot him twice with a shotgun, but not before the former sheriff Bechir got slashed with a knife by the killer.

It was hilarious as Patricia kept the gun trained on the Boogeyman’s head the whole time, on the ambulance, in the morgue, as he went into the crematorium, and until he was nothing but ashes. That was really funny, but I would have shot him in the head immediately when he was down. Patricia was dedicated in making sure this killer was not coming back.

There are two more episodes in the first season of this awesome series. All eight episodes so far can be streamed on Apple TV +.

Malcolm in the Middle: Life’s Still Unfair

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Spoilers

I used to like Malcolm in the Middle, though I never would say that I loved it. It was something that I watched when it was originally on ABC. I knew that there was going to be a new series featuring the returning cast on Hulu/Disney + and i was somewhat interested, but I had not gone out of my way to watch it. It came out in April and I saw it on Disney + a few times, but just never got around to watching it.

Finally, tonight I had an open evening and with only four episodes of the show to watch, I decided that I would finally watch it.

Overall, I am glad I did. However, I would not say that I loved it. There were parts that bugged me, and I am not sure I would have continued if it were a longer series. I do think that this was just the right amount of episodes at four.

The show did tell a specific story centered around Lois and Hal’s 40th wedding anniversary. Again, parts of the storyline was great and other parts were cringe. The final episode had a spectacular conclusion that was emotional and heartfelt and made everything else feel better.

I want to say immediately that I really found Leah, the daughter of Malcolm, played by Keeley Karsten, to be remarkably charming and a perfect fit for the role. The show cleverly gave Leah the ability to talk to the screen like Malcolm could do, narrating much of what was going on. It is obviously a trait passed along from father to daughter.

It was very funny, and well in character, that Malcolm had not ever told Hal and Lois that he had had a daughter, and so when they crashed his home because Malcolm had been avoiding the question about attending Lois & Hal’s big party, all of Malcolm’s lies came crashing down.

I am not sure how I felt about the whole Hal story arc of these episodes, but there is no denying that he came out a better person in the end. I was torn about the whole drug trip he went on (reminded me very much of the trip taken by Mayor Tom on Widow’s Bay), but there were some very funny moments within it.

I was sure that the role of Francis had been recast, but, according to IMDB, it was Christopher Masterson playing the role. I was shocked. I thought that the recast was very similar to Francis, but that it was clearly not him. I was in err on that. Turned out the only recast of the kids was Dewey, who was now played by Caleb Ellsworth-Clark instead of Erik Per Sullivan.

Jane Kaczmarek was giving me Candace Bergen feels as she returned to her multiple Emmy nominated role. You’ve got to appreciate how committed Bryan Cranston is to playing Hal, because he is clearly willing to do anything. They really work together as well.

I was very much split on the Malcolm/Lois confrontation in the men’s room. The toilet humor just did not work for me. I have never been a fan of this style of humor. I thought the writing of the scene between the two characters was outstanding though.

Some of the other characters from the show looked rough. I am not sure if that was intended or if the actors had had tough lives. I would hate to speculate on any of them. I am glad that they were here.

The revival of this show was hit and miss for me, but I am glad that I watched it and I might even watch another show, if they did any more.

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #28

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#28

Fat

Title: “Fat”

Album: Even Worse

Reelased: 1988

Written: Michael Jackson/Al Yankovic

Parody: “Bad” by Michael Jackson

Genre: Pop/Rock/Comedy

The second iconic Weird Al parodies of Michael Jackson songs, “Fat” is one of Weird Al’s most recognizable songs. The video won Weird Al a Grammy for Best Concept Music Video. In the video, Weird Al parodied the video for “Bad”, using the same set.

Lyrics

Your butt is wide, well mine is too
Just watch your mouth or I’ll sit on you
The word is out, better treat me right
‘Cause I’m the king of cellulite
Ham on, ham on
Ham on whole wheat, all right

My zippers bust, my buckles break
I’m too much man for you to take
The pavement cracks when I fall down
I’ve got more chins than Chinatown

Well, I’ve never used a phone booth
And I’ve never seen my toes
When I’m goin’ to the movies
I take up seven rows

Because I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, come on (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, come on, you know (really really fat)
Don’t you call me pudgy, portly or stout
Just now tell me once again who’s fat?

When I walk out to get my mail
It measures on the Richter scale
Down at the beach I’m a lucky man
I’m the only one who gets a tan
If I have one more pie a la mode
I’m gonna need my own zip code

When you’re only having seconds
I’m having twenty-thirds
When I go to get my shoes shined
I gotta take their word

Because I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, come on (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it, you know (really really fat)
And my shadow weighs forty-two pounds
Lemme tell you once again who’s fat

If you see me comin’ your way
Better give me plenty space
If I tell you that I’m hungry
Then won’t you feed my face

Because I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, come on (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it, you know (really really fat)
When I sit around the house
I really sit around the house

You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, come on (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it, you know it (really really fat)
You know, you know (fat fat)
You know, come on (really really fat)

And you know all by myself I’m a crowd
Let me tell you once again

You know I’m huge (fat)
I’m fat, you know it (really really fat)
You know I’m fat, you know (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it (really really fat)
And the whole world knows I’m fat and I’m proud
Just tell me once again who’s fat?

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #29

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#29

The Alternative Polka

Title: “The Alternative Polka”

Album: Bad Hair Day

Released: 1996

Genre: Polka/Comedy

Written:  Ivonil Machado Da Silva / Paula Stefanovich/Al Yankovic

Songs in Medley: “Loser,” “Sex Type Thing,” “All I Want to Do,” “Closer,” “Bang & Blame,” “You Oughta Know,” “Bullet with Butterfly Wings,” “Buddy Holly,” “My Friends,” “I’ll Stick Around,” “Black Hole Sun,” “Basket Case.”

Lyrics

Soy un perdedor! I’m a loser, baby!
So why don’t you kill me? Everybody!
Soy un perdedor! I’m a loser, baby!
So why don’t you kill me? HEY!

I am, I am, I am
I said I wanna get next to you
I said I’m gonna get close to you
You wouldn’t want me have to hurt you too
Hurt you too
I know you want what’s on my mind
I know you like what’s on my mind
I know it eats you up inside
I know, you know, you know, you know
Here I come, I come, I come, I come
Here I come, I come, I come, I come

‘Cause all I wanna do is have some fun
I’ve got a feeling I’m not the only one
All I wanna do is have some fun
I’ve got a feeling I’m not the only one
All I wanna do is have some fun
Until the sun comes up
Over Santa Monica Boulevard

HELP ME! I broke apart my insides
HELP ME! I got no soul to sell
HELP ME! The only thing that works for me
Help me get away from myself
I wanna (BOING) you like an animal
I wanna feel you from the inside
I wanna (BOING) you like an animal
My whole existence is flawed
You get me closer to god hey! Hey! Hey!

You bang, bang, bang, bang, bang
Blame, blame, blame
You bang, bang, bang, bang, bang
It’s not my thing so let it go!

‘Cause that love that you gave that we made
Wasn’t able to make it enough
For you to be open wide, no
And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me you’d hold me
Until you die, ’til you die
But you’re still alive
And I’m here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It’s not fair to deny me of the cross
I bare that you gave to me you oughta know
HEY!

Despite all my rage
I am still just a rat in a cage
Despite all my rage
I am still just a rat in a cage
And someone will say what is
Lost can never be saved despite all my rage
I am still just a rat in a cage

I love all of you hurt by the cold
So hard and lonely too
When you don’t know yourself

I don’t owe you anything!
I don’t owe you anything!
I don’t owe you anything!
I don’t owe you anything!

Black hole sun won’t you come
And wash away the rain black hole sun
Won’t you come, won’t you come
Black hole sun, black hole sun
Won’t you come
Black hole sun, black hole sun
Won’t you come
Black hole sun, black hole sun

Do you have the time to listen to me whine
About nothing and everything all at once?
I am one of those melodramatic fools
Neurotic to the bone no doubt about it
Sometimes I give myself the creeps
Sometimes my mind plays tricks on me
It all keeps all adding up
I think I’m cracking up
And am I just Paranoid am I just stoned?
Or am I just stoned?

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #32

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#32

UHF

Title: “UHF”

Album: UHF

Released: 1989

Written: Al Yankovic

Genre: Rock

Style Parody: The Jackson’s “State of Shock” (featuring Mick Jagger)

Title track to Weird Al’s first motion picture, UHF, which flopped at the box office, but reached cult classic level over the years since.

Lyrics

Put down your remote control, throw out your TV Guide
Put away your jacket, there’s no need to go outside
Don’t you know that we control the horizontal
We control the vertical too
We gonna make a couch potato out of you
That’s what we going to do now

Don’t change the channel, don’t touch that dial
We got it all on UHF
Kick off your sneakers, stick around for a while
We got it all on UHF (on UHF)
Don’t worry ’bout your laundry, forget about your job (ah)
Just crank up the volume and yank off the knob (ah)
We got it all (we got it all), we got it all on UHF

Disconnect the phone and leave the dishes in the sink
You better put away your homework, prime time ain’t no time to think
All you do is make yourself a TV dinner
Press your face right up against the screen

We gonna show you things you ain’t ever seen
If you know what I mean, now

Don’t change the channel, don’t touch that dial
We got it all on UHF
Kick off your sneakers, stick around for a while
We got it all on UHF (on UHF)
Don’t worry ’bout your laundry, forget about your job (ah)
Just crank up the volume and yank off the knob (ah)
We got it all (we got it all), we got it all on UHF

You can watch us all day, you can watch us all night (ooh)
You can watch us any time that you please (ooh)
You can sit around and stare at the picture tube
‘Til your brain turns into cottage cheese, well, now

Don’t change the channel, don’t touch that dial
We got it all on UHF
Kick off your sneakers, stick around for a while
We got it all on UHF (on UHF)
Don’t worry ’bout your laundry, forget about your job (ah)
You gotta crank up the volume and yank off the knob (ah)
We got it all (we got it all), we got it all on UHF

We got it all on UHF (UHF)
We got it all on UHF (UHF)
We got it all on UHF (UHF)
We got it all on UHF (UHF)

We got it all on UHF (we got it all)
We got it all on UHF (UHF)
We got it all on UHF (we got it all)
We got it all on UHF (we got it all, we got it)

We got it all on UHF (we got it, we got it all)
We got it all on UHF (we got it all)
We got it all on UHF (ooh, on UHF)
We got it all on UHF

Source: Musixmatch

Daily Countdown Weird Al Songs #33

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#33

I Love Rocky Road

Title: “I Love Rocky Road”

Album: “Weird Al” Yankovic

Release: 1983

Parody: I Love Rock ‘n’ Roll by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts

Written: Jake Hooker / Alan Merrill / Alfred Yankovic

Genre: Rock ‘n’ Roll/Comedy

Topic: The love of ice cream, especially Rocky Road.

Special Appearance: “Musical” Mike Kieffer

Lyrics

I hear those ice cream bells and I start to drool
Keep a couple quarts in my locker at school
Yeah, but chocolate’s gettin’ old
Vanilla just leaves me cold

There’s just one flavor good enough for me, yeah me
Don’t gimme no crummy taste spoon
I know what I need

Baby, I love rocky road
So, weren’t you gonna buy half a gallon, baby?
I love rocky road
So, have another triple scoop with me, ow

They tell me ice cream junkies are all the same
All the soda jerkers know my name
When their supply is gone then I’ll be movin’ on
But I’ll be back on Monday afternoon, you’ll see
Another truck load’s comin’ in for me, all for me
I’m singin’

I love rocky road
So, weren’t you gonna buy half a gallon, baby?
I love rocky road
So, have another triple scoop with me, ow

Oh, make it talk

When I’m all alone, I just grab myself a cone
And if I get fat and lose my teeth that’s fine with me
Just lock me in the freezer and throw away the key
Singing

I love rocky road
So, weren’t you gonna buy half a gallon, baby?
I love rocky road
So, have another triple scoop with me

I love rocky road
So, weren’t you gonna buy half a gallon, baby?
I love rocky road
So, have another triple scoop with

I love rocky road
So, weren’t you gonna buy half a gallon, baby?
I love rocky road
So, have another triple scoop with

I love rocky road
So, weren’t you gonna buy half a gallon, baby?
I love rocky road
So, have another triple scoop with me

Source: Musixmatch