My maid is cleaning the bathroom, so I can’t take a shower When I do, the water starts getting cold after an hour I couldn’t order off the breakfast menu, cause I slept in till two Then I filled up on bread, didn’t leave any room for tiramisu Oh no, there’s a pixel out in the corner of my laptop screen I don’t have any bills in my wallet small enough for the vending machine Some idiot just called me up on the phone, what!? Don’t they know how to text? OMG! I got
First world, first world problems (First world problems) First world, first world problems (First world problems) First world, first world problems
I bought too many groceries for my refrigerator Forgot my gardener’s name, I’ll have to ask him later Tried to fast forward commercials, can’t, I’m watching live T.V I’m pretty sure the cookies in this airport lounge ain’t gluten free My barista didn’t even bother to make a design in the foam on the top of my vanilla latte
First world, first world problems (First world problems) First world, first world problems (First world problems) First world, first world problems
Can’t remember which car I drove to the mall My Sonicare won’t recharge, now I gotta brush my teeth like a neanderathal The thread count on these cotton sheets has got me itching My house is so big, I can’t get WiFi in the kitchen Uh, I had to buy something I didn’t even need just So I could qualify for free shipping on Amazon
First world, first world problems (First world problems) First world, first world problems (First world problems) First world, first world problems (First world problems)
First world, first world problems (First world problems) First world, first world problems (First world problems) First world, first world problems
Widow’s Bay has been one of the best shows on TV recently. The Apple TV show was a real surprise with how wonderful it was. A wonderful blend of comedy and horror, Widow’s Bay ended their first season with a big twist.
All season long, I was making references to LOST with this show, and this episode drove those references wildly. We get a shot of what looked exactly like the moment when the hatch was opened and they were looking down the shaft. This was with Evan and his friends looked down the shaft. I recognized that shot right away.. it was just missing Jack and John looking down.
Another LOST allusion was the discovery of the film cannister explaining how to sacrifice people to the island. I said out loud after that scene ended that “We need to watch that again” which was a famous line said by both John Locke and Mr. Eko in LOST. This film in this episode was right out of the Dharma Initiative training.
There is also major issues about births on the two shows. On LOST, women could not successfully give birth on the Island and on Widow’s Bay, children born on the island can not leave or they would die. Just the idea that both shows refer to the Island as if it were a real person is a connection that is here.
There are times when I see things that remind me of LOST that are probably not there, or are just my own over-analysis. These are not the case. I refuse to believe that this is anything but an homage to LOST.
The whole Ruth is the final descendent of Richard Warren storyline brought us the big twist. The whole time Tom was in her house, preparing to do her in, I was holding my breath, hoping beyond all hope that he would not kill her. When Bechir left the bunker, I knew what he was going to do. The show tried to make you think that he was going to try and prevent Tom from killing Ruth, but I could see his motivation coming. I was shocked though when he shot her in the back of the head (apparently only glancing, though).
Making Ruth the “secret-mother” of Tom’s wife Lauren was a stroke of genius, which means, of course, that Evan is the last surviving descent of Warren, which immediately switches Tom’s motivation. It is probably a major storyline moving into season 2.
Ruth seemed to be able to survive all of these murder attempts, not falling victim to Tom’s tea poison and not dying after the sheriff shot her in the head. I sure hope she did survive the night, because she was awesome and who else is going to help Deidre up and down her steps?
Does that bell ringing at the end of the episode mean that the island wants 8 more sacrifices? That is sure what I took from it. I assume that Kenny was the first sacrifice, which is why the storm subdued in such a rapid fire moment.
Matthew Rhys was astonishing in this role all season, but his performance here was Emmy worthy.
I hope we do not have to wait too long for season two. The show has been renewed for a second season and no show on TV deserves one more than Widow’s Bay.
This week, I decided to make sure that we only had three medal winners this week instead of having ties for each medal like last week. That was just excessive.
Also-Rans: Odin #2, Absolute Batman #21, GI Joe #23 (B&W variant), Something is Killing the Children #48 (variant cover B), The Trillion Dollar Kid #1 (B Cover), Land of Never #1, Dog Tag #2, Nightwing #139, Smile: For the Camera #4.
Bronze Medalist
X-Men United #4
Variant Cover C
Cover art by Kris Anka
Woof.
This is an absolutely stunning cover featuring Emma Frost. I have always enjoyed the white background and … I mean… look.
Silver Medalist
Hello Darkness #22
Variant Virgin Cover
Cover art by Anwita Citriya
So very creep and a beautifully demented cover with the red tint makes the decapitation so much fun.
Gold Medalist
Of The Earth #2
Cover art by Charlie Adlard
Another beautifully creepy cover. I loved the look of the bird flying across the sun. The creepy hand coming out of the ground is great.
This morning, I watched a psychological thriller/horror film called Hallow Road, and it disturbed me. It was tense and taught, but I am not sure how I feel about the ending.
According to IMDB, “Two parents enter a race against time when they receive a distressing late-night phone call from their daughter after she caused a tragic car accident.”
The film featured two outstanding performances at the center of the story from Rosamund Pike and Matthew Rhys. When I saw Matthew Rhys attached to this film, I was excited as I am truly enjoying his work on Apple TV’s Widow’s Bay. I did not realize that Rosamund Pike was involved until the movie was underway.
Both Rhys and Pike were amazing as panicked parents responding to their daughter’s desperate phone call in the middle of the night. They each showed the entire gamut of emotions as the situation grew worse. Most of the movie took place with the parents inside their car, speaking to their daughter on the phone. The helplessness they felt came through with every new revelation and every unexpected twist.
When it became clear that this movie was taking a shift from compelling family drama into something more mysterious, I was not sure how to feel. While, the unnatural story beats worked as a surprise, I am not sure that it was the route I wanted to see the movie take. It was a sudden shift that, while teased, felt like it came out of nowhere.
However, the film was full of suspense the entire time and the result at the end was powerful. I wonder how powerful it could been if it did not have the twist of story.
The fantastic acting of Pike and Rhys carries this movie and they alone are reasons to see it. I found this on Hulu after a friend’s review from earlier this year.
Style: Originally intended as a pastiche of The Presidents of the United States
Topic: The excitement of a new Hardware Store opening
Hardware Store is one of Weird Al’s originals that everyone is incredibly impressed by because it features one of the fastest rap sections imaginable. It was something that, when recorded, nearly caused Al to go unconscious. He has never performed this live because of the near impossibility of the riff.
Lyrics
Nothin’ ever (ever) happens in this town Feelin’ low down (down), not a lot to do around here I thought that I would go right out of my mind Until a friend told me the news He said, “Hey, you know that vacant lot Right beside the gas station? Well, somebody bought it And on that spot they’re gonna build a shop Where we can go buy bolts and screws”
Since then I’ve been walking on air (air) I can barely brush my teeth or comb my hair ‘Cause I’m so excited and I really don’t care I’ve been waiting since last June For this day to finally arrive I’m so happy (happy) now just to be alive ‘Cause any minute now I’m gonna be inside Well, I hope they open soon
I can’t wait, no, I can’t wait (oh, when) When are they gonna open up that door? I’m goin’ (yes, I’m) goin’, I’m a-goin’ to the Goin’ to the (hard) ware, I’m goin’, really goin’ to the Goin’ (hard), I’m goin’ to the (hard), oh, yes, I’m goin’ to the Hardware store
In my sleeping bag I camped out overnight Right in front of the store, then as soon as it was light out I pressed my nose right up against the glass You know, I had to be first in line Gonna get me a flashlight and a broom Want a pair of pliers for every single room of my house See those hacksaws? Very, very soon One of them will be all mine
Guys with nametags walking down the aisles Rows of garden hoses that go on for miles and miles Brand new socket wrenches in a plethora of styles All arranged alphabetically And they’re doing a promotional stunt There’s a great big purple sign out front That says every 27th customer Will get a ball peen hammer free
I can’t wait, no, I can’t wait (oh, when) When are they gonna open up that door? I’m goin’ (yes, I’m) goin’, I’m a-goin’ to the Goin’ to the (hard) ware, I’m goin’, really goin’ to the Goin’ (hard), I’m goin’ to the (hard), oh, yes, I’m goin’ to the Hardware store I’m goin’ (yes, I’m) goin’, I’m a-goin’ to the Goin’ to the (hard) ware, I’m goin’, really goin’ to the Goin’ (hard), I’m goin’ to the (hard), oh, yes, I’m goin’ to the Hardware store
They’ve got allen wrenches, gerbil feeders, toilet seats, electric heaters Trash compactors, juice extractor, shower rods, and water meters Walkie-talkies, copper wires safety goggles, radial tires BB pellets, rubber mallets, fans and dehumidifiers Picture hangers, paper cutters, waffle irons, window shutters Paint removers, window louvres, masking tape and plastic gutters Kitchen faucets, folding tables, weather stripping, jumper cables Hooks and tackle, grout and spackle, power foggers, spoons and ladles
Pesticides for fumigation, high-performance lubrication Metal roofing, water proofing, multi-purpose insulation Air compressors, brass connectors, wrecking chisels, smoke detectors Tire guages, hamster cages, thermostats, and bug deflectors Trailer hitch demagnetizers, automatic circumcisers Tennis rackets, angle brackets, Duracells and Energizers Soffit panels, circuit brakers, vacuum cleaners, coffee makers Calculators, generators, matching salt and pepper shakers
I can’t wait, no, I can’t wait (oh, when) When are they gonna open the door? I’m goin’ (yes, I’m) goin’, I’m a-goin’ to the Goin’ to the (hard) ware, I’m goin’, really goin’ to the Goin’ (hard), I’m goin’ to the (hard), oh, yes, I’m goin’ to the Hardware store
I’m goin’ (yes, I’m) goin’, I’m a-goin’ to the Goin’ to the (hard) ware, I’m goin’, really goin’ to the Goin’ (hard), I’m goin’ to the (hard), oh, yes, I’m goin’ to the Hardware store I’m goin’ (yes, I’m) goin’, I’m a-goin’ to the Goin’ to the (hard) ware, I’m goin’, really goin’ to the Goin’ (hard), I’m goin’ to the (hard), oh, yes, I’m goin’ to the Hardware store
I do love me some shark movies. Even the bad ones, which there are a lot, have their share of fun and wild moments. Deep Water, which is a return to form for Finnish film director Renny Harlin, has its share of moments and scares.
According to IMDB, “A group of international passengers en route from Los Angeles to Shanghai are forced to make an emergency landing in shark-infested waters. Now they must work together in hopes to overcome the frenzy of sharks drawn to the wreckage.”
There were a group of superficial characters that meant little to me, but there were some intriguing characters that I liked very much. Finally, there was at least one jerk who I wanted to become a shark-burger. Most of the characters were kind of dull, but I still found myself rooting for most of them.
I was shocked to see both Aaron Eckhart and Sir Ben Kingsley in this cast, as I felt as if this film was a B-level film at best. I still think that is the case, but it is always great to see Kingsley in anything.
There were enough interpersonal relationships between the characters to keep them from being more than juts chum for the sharks. Yes, the characters are not Martin Brody, Matt Hooper or Quint, but you can’t expect that type of writing in every shark movie.
I did think many of the shark attacks were silly at times, especially the one involving the helicopter, but their presence did create a sufficient amount of tension to keep the thin story afloat.
Harlin was unafraid to kill off characters in many different ways, and it did feel as if any of them were ripe for being eaten (or drowned). The stakes are absolutely off the charts.
Sure, there are basic story beats that you see over and again in shark movies, but they do work overall here and the plane crash that led before the sharks, was excellent.
I enjoyed this movie and the film hit me in the feels at the end, which is really should have. I think this is a solid shark movie and I am happy to have rented it on Fandango at Home.
Today kicks off the second half of this year’s June Swoon 5 with a sci-fi/horror film on Hulu called Ash. Directed and scored by Flying Lotus, a DJ, rapper, filmmaker and record producer, Ash feels like a mixed bag.
According to IMDB, “A woman wakes up on a distant planet and finds the crew of her space station viciously killed. Her investigation into what happened sets in motion a terrifying chain of events.“
The good parts of Ash included the lead performance from Eiza González as Riya, the woman who wakes up and is confused by the gore and death around her. González did a very strong job of expressing her confusion and fear of the situation that she found herself in.
Another positive is the look and the sound of the film. The score made the film standout from some of the other entries in the subgenre of space monster/horror. The score kept the audience on their toes and uneasy as the mysteries unfurled around Riya. The film’s special effects and imagery was also top notch as everything, especially the body horror aspects of the film, looked specifically frightening or horrendous.
The biggest problem is that this movie, story wise, does not even try to attempt something different than what we have seen before. There are scenes that feel as if they were taken directly out of Alien or The Thing or Event Horizon or Cloverfield: Paradox or many other space monster films.
The film leaned hard on cliches throughout the entire movie. Riya had amnesia at the beginning after awakening to find everyone dead. I mean… was there ever any question about what had happened here? Aaron Paul’s character Brion was very cliche as well. The only thing not cliche about him was that he spelled his name with an “o” instead of an “a.”
The film was only 1 hour and 35 minutes long, but it felt much longer than that. It dragged through the first two thirds of the movie before a fairly spry final act helped pick up the action. I am not opposed to slow burns, but there needed to be something more entertaining during that slow burn to engage my mind. This did not have it.
The film looked great, sounded great and had a decent lead performance, but there is just not enough of anything else to make this anything but a forgettable flick.
Written: David Eric Grohl / Kurt D. Cobain / Krist Anthony Novoselic/Al Yankovic
Genre: Grunge
Topic: No one can understand Nirvana’s lyrics
This song helped bring Weird Al back after a bit of a career slump. He called Kurt Cobain at SNL to get permission. Cobain asked if the song would be about food.
Lyrics
What is this song all about? Can’t figure any lyrics out How do the words to it go I wish you’d tell me, I don’t know
Now I’m mumblin’, and I’m screamin’ And I don’t know what I’m singin’ Crank the volume, ears are bleedin’ I still don’t know what I’m singin’ We’re so loud and incoherent Boy, this oughta bug your parents
Yeah Blergh Haai
It’s unintelligible I just can’t get it through my skull It’s hard to bargle nawdle zouss With all these marbles in my mouth
Well, we don’t sound like Madonna Here we are now, we’re Nirvana Sing distinctly, we don’t wanna Buy our album, we’re Nirvana A garage band from Seattle Well, it sure beats raisin’ cattle Yeah
And I forgot the next verse Oh, well, I guess it pays to rehearse The lyric sheet’s so hard to find What are the words? Oh, never mind
Well, I’m yellin’, and we’re playin’ But I don’t know what I’m sayin’ What’s the message I’m conveyin’? Can you tell me what I’m sayin’? So, have you got some idea? Didn’t think so, well, I’ll see ya
Today’s June Swoon 5 film is another Oscar winner that I had not seen prior to today. It won the Academy Award for the Best Documentary Feature in 2026 and it was entitled Mr. Nobody Against Putin.
My initial thoughts were that this was about the war in Ukraine, and, while the Ukraine War was a major theme of the film, the center of the doc was different.
Pavel Talankin was the main character of the doc, and he was a teacher/teacher organizer/school videographer at a school in the Russian city of Karabash, a town known as the most toxic and poisonous town in Russia. Pavel began filming in earnest after the Russian invasion of Ukraine in 2022, when the Russian government required schools to have regular “patriotic displays” and use state-written curriculum.
Pavel was always one for openness and freedom, proving what he called a safe space for the students to express themselves. These governmental requirements became such an opposition to what he believed that he went as far as to resign. However, when he was contacted by director David Borenstein about a response Pavel had made to an Instagram post, Pavel rescinded his resignation to compile more film for a documentary on how the war was affecting the school he worked at.
There were some amazing moments in the doc, none more shocking than when, prior to a Russian flag ceremony at the school, Pavel played the “Star-Spangled Banner” as performed by Lady Ga Ga. I was shocked that he was allowed to get away with that and that did not get him arrested or removed from the school.
The doc featured several other intriguing characters such as “Pavel Abdulmanov, a pro-Putin history teacher; a student named Masha, whose brother fights and later dies in the war; and former students who are drafted into the army“-(Wikipedia)
I was completely fascinated by this powerful, first person film and the perspective it brought to the situation that the school found itself in. As a teacher myself, I could not comprehend how I would react to the same situation and I pray that I never have to find out. Mr. Nobody Against Putin is a tremendous work with some extreme emotional moments.
Topic: Santa snaps and goes on a North Pole murder spree
I love this song. The idea of a disgruntled Santa flipping out is great. There is a really funny “Extra Gory Version” that I heard for the first time on Dr. Demento Show.
Lyrics
Down in the workshop all the elves were makin’ toys For the good gentile girls and the good gentile boys When the boss busted in, nearly scared ’em half to death Had a rifle in his hands and cheap whiskey on his breath From his beard to his boots he was covered with ammo Like a big fat drunk disgruntled Yuletide Rambo And he smiled as he said with a twinkle in his eye “Merry Christmas to all, now you’re all gonna die”
The night Santa went crazy The night St. Nick went insane Realized he’d been gettin’ a raw deal Something finally must have snapped in his brain
Well, the workshop is gone now, he decided to bomb it Everywhere you’ll find pieces of Cupid and Comet And he tied up his helpers and he held the elves hostage And he ground up poor Rudolph into reindeer sausage He got Dancer and Prancer with an old German Luger And he slashed up Dasher just like Freddy Krueger And he picked up a flamethrower and he barbequed Blitzen And he took a big bite and said, “It tastes just like chicken”
The night Santa went crazy The night Kris Kringle went nuts Now you can’t hardly walk around the North Pole Without steppin’ in reindeer guts
There’s the National Guard and the FBI There’s a van from the Eyewitness News And helicopters circlin’ ’round in the sky And the bullets are flyin’, the body count’s risin’ And everyone’s dyin’ to know, oh Santa, why? My my my my my my You used to be such a jolly guy
Yes, Virginia, now Santa’s doing time In a Federal prison for his infamous crime Hey little friend now, don’t you cry no more tears He’ll be out with good behavior in seven hundred more years But now Vixen’s in therapy and Donner’s still nervous And the elves all got jobs working for the Postal Service And they say Mrs. Clause, she’s on the phone every night With her lawyer negotiating the movie rights
They’re talkin’ bout, the night Santa went crazy The night St. Nicholas flipped Broke his back for some milk and cookies Sounds to me like he was tired of gettin’ gypped
Whoa oh, the night Santa went crazy The night St. Nick went insane Realized he’d gettin’ a raw deal Something finally must have snapped in his brain Whoa oh, something finally must have snapped in his brain Tell ya, something finally must have snapped in his brain
Yes Virginia, Now Santa is dead Some guy From the swat team blew a hole through his head Yes little friend now, that’s his brains on the floor, I guess they wont have the fat guy kicking around anymore But now there’s no more presents for children’s enjoyment And the Elves have to wait in the line and file for unemployment And they say Mrs. Clause, she’s on the phone every night With her lawyer negotiating the movie rights
The Agents of Shield finished up their adventure in the future with some major battling, found Robin, the little girl (now older woman) who could see the future, killed the Kree, including Kasius and Sinara and had Flint create a monolith so they could return to their own time.
Very busy.
I was not 100% in love with the future stuff, but it did provide us with some major storyline bits including:
Yo Yo meeting herself (without arms) and she revealed about Coulson’s sickness.
Deke, who seemed to sacrifice himself, arrived back in the present with Shield- and had a surprising familial connection.
The Lighthouse is one awesome HQ.
Once back, things got wild as the team learned of Coulson’s impending death, and they got made that he did not tell them about it. Deke was taking in all of the wonders of the earth he had never seen…including Zema. Fitz and Simmons gets married.
The Fitz and Simmons wedding led to a major reveal… that Deke is their grandchild, though no one is aware.
Deathlok came back for back up to close a dimensional riff in a lower level of the Lighthouse. It was manifesting fears from a “Fear Dimension” that was trying to kill them.
General Hale is a horrendous character. She was a clear antagonist for our team, but it does get a little old to have the generals always being the antagonists. Plus, her daughter is a weird assassin of some sort who cut off Yo Yo’s arms.
The whole earth gets blown up plotline is still active and unsolved as of yet, but I know that the series does deal with that story before the end of season 5.
I have always been a fan of Martin Short, even more so since Only Murders in the Building. When the new documentary entitled Martin: Life is Short dropped on Netflix recently, I placed it on my queue so I could get around to watching it. I watched it this Sunday.
This gives the life story of Martin Short, from his childhood, including some terrible tragedies, to his remarkable career, from the flops and major successes.
There were a lot of great interviews from Short’s friends and family including his brothers Michael, Brian, his sister Nora, and Tom Hanks, Steve Martin, Catherine O’Hara, Eugene Levy, John Mulaney, Andrea Martin, Paul Shaffer, Steven Spielberg, and Rita Wilson.
The story spends a lot of time on the relationship between Martin and his wife Nancy. They are shown as the perfect couple, one that others wished they had relationships like.
I loved watching this documentary and it went by quite quickly.
Today’s June Swoon 5 film was on Netflix and it was directed by Ron Howard. It was entitled Eden and it is based on a true story.
According to IMDB, “Based on a factual account of a group of outsiders who settle on a remote island only to discover their greatest threat isn’t the brutal climate or deadly wildlife, but each other.”
The cast was remarkably strong and their performances were all exceptional. The cast included Jude Law, Daniel Brühl, Sydney Sweeney, Ana de Armas, and Vanessa Kirby.
These actors brought what they could to the film, despite that their characters were not written with much depth and were basically surface level.
There were some solid scenes and watching these characters back stab each other was a fun watch.
Ana de Armas was tremendously intriguing as the Baroness. She was very manipulative and used her sexuality in some very creative manners.
Eden was a mixed bag. Great actors with solid performances, but the story and characters were lacking at times. It was not a terrible watch, but it could have been so much more than what we got.
There are times when I am not happy with the concept of the Sunday Morning Sidewalk. The idea was one episode every Sunday morning for TV shows that I have not seen. Every once in awhile, I come across a show where I desperately want to watch the next episode. The Boroughs is the latest example.
The Boroughs is an 8-episode series on Netflix from the Duffer Brothers (of Stranger Things fame) and when episode one ended, I was wishing it was next Sunday right now.
Taking all of my willpower, I shut off the show, preventing myself from binging it all day long on this lazy Sunday where my schedule is fairly open.
The show centers around a retirement community called The Boroughs and a group of older characters who live there. However, there is some kind of weird, supernatural aspect to the show and, as Ed Bagley Jr. said, “There are owls in the walls.”
If you know about me, I love the evil owl metaphor. On Twin Peaks, the Owls were not what they seemed, and this certainly hooked me immediately.
I was also impressed with how quickly I was able to connect with the characters. They were all so great that, even those that did not get a lot of details, were ones I felt tied to. Such an amazing cast with Alfred Molina, Bill Pullman, Alfre Woodard, Denis O’Hare, Geena Davis, Jane Kaczmarek, Clarke Peters, Dee Wallace, and Eric Edelstein.
The supernatural mystery was not the main component of episode one. It was the introduction of Sam Cooper, played by Alfred Molina, the widower whose wife had signed the contract to move to the Boroughs. The gruff and grizzled man did not want to be in this community, and he was looking for a way out.
I have to say that I loved Bill Pullman’s Jack Willard. He was such a wonderful breath of fresh air in the episode and his kindness toward Sam was very inspiring. I really hope that the creature that was seemingly feeding off Jack at the end of episode one did not kill him.
What is going on in this community? Is there something sinister with the people who organized the community or is there something about the land? Anything is possible, and I am so in with this. As I said, if this was not the Sunday Morning Sidewalk, I’d be well into episode two by now.
EYG- Embrace Your Geekness 