EYG Top 10 Space Movies

EYG23

In honor of First Man, the story of Neil Armstrong that opens this week, this week’s Top 10 list is the Top 10 Space Movies.  Now, the key to this list is that there will be no fantastical aspects to the list. That means that there will be no Star Wars, Star Trek, Aliens, Guardians of the Galaxy etc.

There was a guest on this week’s podcast as Steve Morris, Rocha’s co-host on the Cinefiles, came to add his list.  He was very entertaining and made a nice addition to the guys.  Special guests on Top 10 never seem to fail.

Image result for interstellar#10.  Interstellar.  I almost made this the James Bond Moonraker, but I decided it was just too bad to make the list.  I am really not a big fan of Interstellar, because I believe that the final hour or so of this movie really takes this film off the track.  I did enjoy the first part of the film, but, once they arrived on Matt Damon’s planet, things really go downhill for me.  However, it is a stunning visual accomplishment and has wonderful music.  That alone should justify its inclusion on here.

 

Image result for armageddon movie#9.  Armageddon.  A really stupid movie that I kind of like.  I was always a fan of Bruce Willis and he is in all of his Bruce Willis-goodness here.  There is a great cast here and, if you do not think too much, you can have a lot of fun with Armageddon.

 

 

Image result for space camp movie#8.  Space Camp.  A group of kids go to space camp and winds up accidentally launching them into space.  There is a group of well known actors here including Lea Thompson, Tom Skerritt, Kelly Preston, and Kate Capshaw.  John Williams does the music for the film.  There is also a robot here called Jinx who befriended Max, played by a young Joaquin Phoenix.

 

Image result for hidden figures#7.  Hidden Figures.  Rocha mentioned this film but poo-pooed this by saying they never go into space.  However, the idea behind the film directly involves NASA and being able to launch John Glenn into orbit.  I found this very surprisingly good and I did not expect that.  There is a great cast here too with Octavia Spencer, Taraji P. Henson and Janelle Monáe.  Plus, this is a true story and a story that needs to be more well-known.  The story of African-American women coming into the world of NASA and race relations is really important.

 

Image result for planet of the apes 1968#6.  Planet of the Apes.  The original from 1968.  Thanks to Steve Morris who put this film on his list and that made it possible for me to include it on my list.  I love this movie and it has so many iconic moments that it is a classic.  It is in the EYG Hall of Fame and it deserves it.  The film tells the story of how humans wind up destroying the world and losing their place at the top of the chain.  And the ending scene is as shocking and brilliant as any movie ever.

 

Image result for gravity movie#5.  Gravity.  The Oscar winning film starring Sandra Bullock as a medical engineer astronaut who winds up isolated in space desperately trying to find her way back home.  Bullock is tremendous here as is George Clooney, who plays one of the other astronauts who winds up lost in space prior to his retirement.  The imagery of the film is amazing and the film is tense and anxiety-ridden.

 

Image result for 2001 space odyssey#4. 2001: A Space Odyssey.  The Stanley Kubrick film that is an epic mind f###.  I saw this recently on the big screen and it was quite a bizarre experience.  The computer Hal is one of the great movie villains of all time, but it really felt like you needed to be stoned in order to truly understand what is happening in the screen.  It is another film on this list that is visually stunning, with colors and images flying everywhere.  It also has one of the strangest and most bizarre endings of any movie.

 

Image result for moon movie#3. Moon.  Sam Rockwell is wonderful in this great film that features him on the surface of the moon, working for an earth corporation that is trying to find a solution to the problems on earth.  Rockwell is preparing to retire and return to his wife on the planet.  However, he begins to have problems and some truths are revealed.  This is a great sci-fi movie and a great performance by Sam Rockwell.

 

Image result for the martian movie#2.  The Martian.  Matt Damon is stranded on Mars, believed to be dead,  and, when they realized their error,  they have to try and rescue him.  He spends several years on the planet, growing potatoes and trying to survive until he could be saved.  The Martian was a Golden Globe winning film in the wrong category of Comedy/Musical (It did have its moments of humor).  That should not be held against it  Damon was tremendous here and the film was a real return to form for director Ridley Scott.

 

Image result for apollo 13 movie#1.  Apollo 13.  Houston, we have a problem.  This is a true story and tells the story of how NASA took the biggest failure of the space program at the time and turned it into its biggest success.  Starring Tom Hanks, Kevin Bacon, Bill Paxton, Ed Harris, Gary Sinise, Xander Berkeley, Apollo 13 is tense and nerve-inducing.  It is full of both humor and humanity.  It is exciting and thrilling.  It promotes intelligence and shows how the brains at NASA was able to do the impossible.  The chemistry of the three on the shuttle is great.  Directed by Ron Howard, Apollo 13 is a easily rewatchable film that is always enjoyable.

 

Honorable mentions:  As I mentioned, I considered Moonraker, but I came to my senses.   Contact was on my side list because I have not seen this in a long time.  Space Cowboys is another ridiculous one.  I actually have not seen The Right Stuff so I could not include it.  Mission to Mars is not that great either.

 

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A Star is Born (2018)

This is the fourth feature adaptation of the story of A Star is Born and there is a reason why they continue to remake this film.  The movie is a classic.

Actor Bradley Cooper makes his feature film directorial debut with the remake, and he does an admirable job as director.  It cannot be easy to choose something so well known as your first directorial job, and then to be the lead actor as well can only make that even more difficult.  Cooper does a remarkable job considering all of the challenges he could have faced.

However, it was not just as a director that Cooper shined.  Playing the lead role of Jackson Maine, Cooper knocked it out of the park, practically making himself one of the leading candidates for an Academy Award nomination for Best Actor.

The story is familiar and this version does not detour from it in any real substantial manner.  Cooper plays Jackson Maine, a rock singer and kick ass guitarist who is on the edge of a downward path of his career.  He meets Ally (Lady Gaga), a young and shy singer.songwriter with a powerful voice, and he help introduce her to the world of super stardom.  The two of them fall in love, but the celebrity of Maine brings with it pitfalls galore that he has to try to overcome and that make their love story harrowing.

Cooper is tremendous, but so is Lady Gaga.  She is exceptional in the role of Ally.  She brings so much soul and heart to the role that a lot of seasoned actresses would be unable to accomplish what she did.  I have heard some criticisms that Cooper “tailor-made” the role for Lady Gaga and focused on her strengths and that seems to be a reason some people are downgrading her performance.  That is an obnoxious comment, as if actors and actresses aren’t having their strengths targeted by directors in every movie.  The attempt to belittle the achievement of Lady Gaga is unnecessary and borders on misogynistic.

The music in A Star is Born is unbelievable, and not just the Lady Gaga songs.  Sure, Lady Gaga is one of the best vocal performers in the entertainment biz today, but who knew that Bradley Cooper was as awesome as he turned out to be.  The first song performed by Cooper, “Black Eyes,” was a rocking smash.  There are so many emotional hits and rocking good times on the soundtrack that it is one that I am going to be looking into on iTunes.

Some of the side characters had amazing performances as well.  In particular, Sam Elliott, who plays Jack’s older brother, is just out of the world.  Sure, Sam Elliott is always great, but this is next level work.  Every second he is on the screen, Elliott is breathtaking.  Andrew Dice Clay plays Ally’s father and he is amazing here as well.  I did not expect to see Clay be such a transcendent figure in the film, despite his smart part.  David Chappelle makes a small, but memorable role as one of Jack’s old friends.  I do have to say that Chappelle’s part just kind of came out of nowhere, but that is a minor gripe as he was great when he was on screen.

The story itself is an emotional one, and will definitely require tissues before it is over.  There are amazing moments of joy and other moments of heartbreak as well, as Jack deals with his addictions and Ally deals with her new found fame.

The one problem is that the story is a bit predictable.  It follows a formulaic pattern and it does not deviate from those beats much at all.  Since it is the fourth version of basically the same story, I can see where some people might not be surprised with the events that happen in the film.

There are also some pacing issues and, because of this, the film does feel a little long.  However, the amazing chemistry between Cooper and Lady Gaga helps to push those issues to the side.

A Star is Born has been remade four times, once in 1937, 1954, 1976 and now in 2018.  This new version works on a ton of levels and should be one of the big Oscar nominated films for this year.  The film is carried by two powerhouse performances by Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga, whose seamless chemistry makes even the doubters change their tune.  It is a great movie and a remarkably entertaining time at the movies.

4.5 stars

Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978)

As we are now in October, I have started a watch of some of the horror/thriller genre films that either I haven’t yet seen or ones that I haven’t seen in a long time.  The remake of Invasion of Body Snatchers falls into that second category.

I remember watching the film as a youth, but I honestly did not remember much about it so this rewatch today was very much like watching it for the first time.

Donald Sutherland, Brooke Adams, Leonard Nimoy, Jeff Goldblum and Veronica Cartwright were the main actors in the cast.  They all were very solid in the well acted remake.  Sutherland, in particular, was great as Matthew Bannell, a health inspector, discovers that people are being replaced with emotion-less pod creatures after they sleep.  Bannell, along with a small group of his friends, try to find a way to stop the creatures before it is too late.

The film creates an effective feeling of paranoia as the story progresses.  You immediately distrust everyone and some of the imagery of the film was fairly frightening, especially for the time.

I did have a couple of issues.  I did not understand the relationship between Bannell and Brooke Adams’ character, Elizabeth.  Through much of the film, I wondered if they had been related, until later when they were kissing and proclaiming their love for one another.  I’m not sure if they were intended to be exes, just friends or acquaintances.

The invasion also seemed to arrive without much reasoning.  I think that is part of the idea though, indicating that something like this can come from nowhere and you might never see it coming.

The sound of the movie really works well, helping to create that feeling of anxiety and helplessness that the film fosters.  The cries of the pod creatures was also very unnerving.

Invasion of the Body Snatchers was a strong remake and works in many manners.

classic

 

Fantastic Mr. Fox (2009)

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Fantastic Mr. Fox is a lovely to look at, fun to watch and enjoyable time at an animated movie. Based on a story from Roald Dahl, Fantastic Mr. Fox blends the best of Dahl with the traits of Wes Anderson in a wonderful mishmash of styles.

George Clooney voices the lead character, Mr. Fox, who is a proud “wild animal” that gives up his life of chicken stealing when he discovers that his wife,  Mrs. Fox (Meryl Streep) is pregnant with his first child.  After years of a dull, domesticated life, Mr. Fox feels the pull of his life of crime once more when he discovers three big time farmers just begging to be pilfered.

Many of Anderson’s normal crew is involved in voicing characters in this animated classic, including Bill Murray, Owen Wilson, Willem Dafoe and Eric Chase Anderson.

The animation style is great in the stop action animation style.  The herky-jerky style showed an even more artistic flair from the director, who insisted on the film not being too finished in the animation.

There is a lot going on in this story besides the apparent midlife crisis of Mr. Fox.  The film deals with the relationships between parents and children as well as the jealousy that can develop between family members.  Mr. Fox’s son Ash (Jason Schwartzman) was not an athlete like his father no matter what he did, but his cousin Kristofferson (Eric Chase Anderson) was a natural and created a ton of tension inside Ash.

Some of the bits in Fantastic Mr. Fox are extremely funny and entertaining.  They show the wit of Wes Anderson very well without completely losing the darkness of Roald Dahl.

Fantastic Mr. Fox is a fine film that the entire family can enjoy.  The movie is not just for kids despite the fact that they will probably enjoy watching it.

funtime

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Batman v. Superman Two-Voice Poem

bvs

Batman v. Superman Two-Voice Poem

Batman                                                        Both                                         Superman

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Versus

I am the night                                                                                      I am the son of Krypton

He is a dangerous alien

His carelessness cost lives

friends…

I am a hero                   He is a crazed vigilante

Burning bats into shoulders

I should do something…

Protect my city

Gotham                                                                                                  Metropolis

From him

I…                                                                                                              I…

Must fight

To kill the alien                                                                                       Manipulated by Luthor

Face off

Special suit-Kryptonite                                                                         No time for talk

Fight

God will die by man’s hand                                                                   Martha

Why’d you say that name?                            Mom?                             Martha

WHY’D YOU SAY THAT NAME!                                                              Lois

Friends now

I will save your mother                                                                            I will face Lex

Trust me

Brutality.  Violence                                                                                     Kryptonian vessel

Doomsday

What can I do?                                                                                             He’s powerful

Is she with you?

Wonder                                                                                                           Woman

The Trinity

Death

He’s gone

An inspiration

My fault

Together from now on.

Venom

Well, it is not as bad as I have heard, but it is nowhere as good as it could have been.

Sony Picture’s Venom arrived in the theaters with some big time baggage from negative reviews on Twitter and the internet, and I can certainly see why some people would not like Venom.  I am not going to claim that I loved this movie either.  In fact, it might be one of those that gets worse the more I think about it, but my initial thoughts were that it was okay, but no great.

Tom Hardy plays down on his luck reporter Eddie Brock, who loses his job and his fiance after an ill-advised interview with the crooked head of Life Corporation Carlton Drake (Riz Ahmed).  Brock’s life takes a strange turn when he bonds with one of the alien symbiotes that the Life corporation were studying and they become Venom.

The tone of this movie was unexpected.  It was really more of a buddy comedy than it was a horror film, which was what I had expected.  That is not necessarily a bad thing, but I am afraid most of the jokes did not hit for me.

Hampering the jokes even more was the horrid dialogue that was tearing down this script.  There were laughable lines, but not laughable in the funny way.  More like the “turd in the wind” way.

I will say that, despite its early flaws, I was having a decent time watching Venom for the first part of the film.  However, the third act, in particular, went down hill fast and hard and really wasted the good will that I had built up.  The third act felt totally rushed.  It was nothing more than a sloppy CGI fest between Venom and Riot that was not fun to watch and had little to no stakes. The film tried to pretend it had stakes, but it was absolutely just pretending.

Tom Hardy was fine as Eddie Brock, though he did seem kind of whiny at times.  His physicality of the role was solid and I did like the interactions between Brock and Venom, despite the lackluster dialogue.  There were some really good action sequences in the film, one in an office building and the one where Eddie fights in his apartment.  There is a poor car/motorcycle chase scene though that was overlong and was peppered with too many unneeded explosions.

Riz Ahmed was a terrible villain, stereotypical and rather boring.  Ahmed is way too good of an actor to be placed in a role with so little development.  Michelle Williams is also in this movie.  She played the worst female character in a comic book movie in a long time.  She too is too good of an actor to have this material given to her.  I did not believe for one moment in the relationship with her and Eddie.  I was actually more interested in her relationship with good guy Dr. Dan Lewis (Reid Scott).

I did not mind the origin of this version of Venom sans Spider-man as it seemed at first that Carlton Drake would take that role.  However, the film did seem like it was missing something for Venom, a counter balance to him that is perfectly provided by Spider-man.  And while it might not be fair to say this, I do think this would have been a stronger movie had Spider-man made an appearance and was tied into Venom’s world.

There is really only one post credit scene, as we see the world’s worst wig.  At the end of the credits, though, they show an extended clip from Spider-man: Into the Spider-Verse animated film that is coming out in December, starring Miles Morales, and it looked absolutely amazing.  Watching that clip, I had a serious sense of wonder that was lacking from Venom.  I did leave the theater with a happier feel than I did after Venom was over, so there is that.

Venom has its moments where the film was enjoyable, but, unfortunately, there were more scenes where it was pretty dumb.  The dialogue was terrible.  There were too many talented actors that was not provided a sufficiently weighty role.  The third act took the film, that was hanging on by a thread, well off the rails and rushed through to an unearned conclusion.  Tom Hardy was good though and there were some good moments (though too many of the best scenes were in the trailer).

This Venom was better than the Topher Grace version, but not by much.

2.75 stars

EYG Top 10 Musicians Turned Actor

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This week’s list is an interesting one.  I liked this topic as the list was Top 10 Musicians Turned Actors.  I found this a fascinating group of performers and listening to Matt and John is always a good time.

This has to be performers who were first musicians prior to being actors, which eliminates someone like Justin Timberlake.

I am also linking up an actor to a performance in a film, so it is not a compilation of a total number of films in his/her oeuvre.

Top 10 Musicians Turned Actor

 

Related image#10.  Dolly Parton, 9 to 5.  Miss Dolly was wonderful in this 80s classic comedy.  Dolly Parton was very charming and engaging in this, her first film.  She works so well with the other two lead women, Lily Tomlin and Jane Fonda and she certainly held her own with those two huge stars.

 

 

Image result for connick jr copycat#9.  Henry Connick Jr.  Copycat.  This is one where the film itself helped make this list.  I enjoyed the film Copycat as Connick Jr. was the serial killer stalking Sigourney Weaver.  Connick Jr. was downright chilling in the film and I was always a fan of serial killers.  This film brought some real tension and anxiety for the audience.

 

Image result for cher mask#8. Cher, Mask.  Cher loved that boy.  The film is based on a true story of a boy with disfiguring facial deformity called craniodiaphyseal dysplasia.  Cher played the mother of this boy and she fought for her son so much.  She brings a wonderful humanity to the role and creates a believable bond with her son.

 

 

Related image#7.  Jerry Reed, Smokey and the Bandit.  The “Snowman” has his ears on.  Smokey and the Bandit is a fun film with some great silly situations.  Jerry Reed perfectly fits in as the sidekick of the Bandit, as they travel across Tex-Arcana to bring back a load of beer.  Sure, he was a criminal, but he was charming as all get out.  And I loved the song, “East Bound and Down”, sung by Reed himself.  That’s a big 10-4 good buddy.

 

Related image#6.  Meat Loaf, The Mighty and Rocky Horror Picture Show.  This was the one I could not decide which of the films I wanted to use so I decided to use them both.  The Mighty is the adaptation of Freak the Mighty, a book by Rodman Philbrick and he plays the rotten Iggy Lee.  In Rocky Horror, he played Eddie and was able to sing Hot Patootie before winding up as supper.  The Mighty is more of a subtle performance but Eddie is a vital part of the craziness of Rocky Horror.  Meat Loaf brings a larger than life image to both roles.

 

Image result for weird al uhf film#5.  “Weird Al” Yankovic, UHF.  His almighty weirdness makes this list for his cult classic UHF film that showcased the unusual talents of Al Yankovic.  There are so many iconic moments including Gandhi 2, Wheel of Fish, Spatula City as Weird Al tries to make a success out of a fledgling television station.  There is a great supporting cast as well including Michael Richards, Victoria Jackson, Anthony Geary, Kevin McCarthy, Emo Phillips, Fran Drescher and Dr. Demento.  Weird Al may not be the greatest actor, but he will always have a place on a list here at EYG.

 

Image result for boogie nights mark wahlberg#4.  Mark Wahlberg, Boogie Nights.  This was last week’s number one movie in the Mark Wahlberg’s films and it is well deserved.  I’m not sure counting him as a musician is fair considering he spent a long time trying to get past the identity of Marky Mark.  Still, this is a great performance in the true story of Dirk Diggler and the world of pornography and is a definite deserving actor for this spot on the list.

 

Image result for madonna league of their own#3.  Madonna, A League of Their Own.  I love this movie and Madonna does a fantastic job as “All the Way” Mae.  Her pairing with Rosie O’Donnell is one of the highlights of the movie.  She does a fantastic job in a dance number at the local bar too, showing how much skills Madonna truly does have. I do like Evita as well, but A League of Their Own is one of my favorites of all time.  Plus, we made it through the entire movie without seeing her bosoms.

 

Image result for sinatra manchurian candidate#2.  Frank Sinatra, The Manchurian Candidate.  This is a fantastic performance from Frank.  Frank was the investigator trying to figure out the Russian plot to assassinate the president.  Sinatra is great here as he is conflicted by guilt over his failure to stop the brainwashed killer.  The Manchurian Candidate is almost too on spot for these days.  Angela Lansbury is just tremendous in the role of the evil mother.

 

Image result for will smith enemy of the state#1.  Will Smith, Enemy of the State.  This is a great movie and one of the first that really showed that the Fresh Prince himself could carry himself in a big time film against a real movie star in Gene Hackman.  Will Smith showed charm and energy as the lawyer who found himself in a government conspiracy.  This is a fantastic film.  Will Smith has had a lot of great films on his resume including Men in Black, Pursuit of Happyness, Concussion, I Am Legend, Independence Day, Hancock, and I, Robot.  Still, Enemy of the State is one of the first moments where Will Smith stepped out of the comedic roles and became an action star.

 

Honorable Mentions:  I found several other possible choices.  I had to struggle to make that final choice (which actually turned up at #9).  I debated Courtney Love in The People vs. Larry Flynt.  I considered Queen Latifah in Girls Trip.  I have always really like Latifah, but her list of films hurt her, despite as charismatic as she is.  David Bowie in Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me was a wild ride, crazy and very David Lynch-ian.  Mandy Moore’s voice over work in Tangled is great.  There were a couple of Barbra Streisand roles that I looked at.  Olivia Newton-John does some solid work in Grease too.

 

EYG23

 

 

Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988)

Image result for killer klowns from outer space movie poster

I had an afternoon filled with campy clowns killing innocent bystanders in a sleepy town.

Killer Klowns from Outer Space is a weird ride.  The film is silly and a good-natured horror movie that does not take itself seriously and knows exactly what it is.

Looking at the title and the movie poster, I was pretty sure this would be nothing more than a terrible B movie.  I was wrong.  This was a reasonably enjoyable B movie.

I mean…what else can you ask for but a clown car being chased by an ice cream truck?

There are some cute and imaginative uses of the clowns.  They might be considered very creepy for those who have the unreasonable fear of clowns.  After It, I was really surprised to find out how many people were actually scared of clowns.  And these clowns can be creepy.  Sure, if you are not fearful of clowns, you will not be scared by the Killer Klowns, but if you are…

I certainly have seen worse alien invasion movies.  I have seen alien invasion movies that are every bit as ridiculous as Killer Klowns from Outer Space but try to take themselves seriously as if they were the second coming of Citizen Kane.  Killer Klowns from Outer Space embraces the silliness and provides a fun time because of it.

funtime

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Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer (1986)

Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer

Quite a brutal and frightening film.

Michael Rooker is Henry, a character loosely based on the serial killer Henry Lee Lucas, and Rooker is a dominating force on the screen.  The chilling and callous manner in which he dispatches these innocent people shows how much of a monster some of these serial killers can be.

It is odd, but Henry is not the worst character in the film. Otis (Tom Towles) is far and away a worse person.  Otis would at times accompany Henry on his killing sprees and he would even video tape the events.

I have to say that I was having a herd time finding someone to root for in the film.  It weirdly almost sets Henry up as the anti-hero in a few scenes, but those feel wrong (as is proven at the film’s conclusion).  I really wanted there to be some kind of comeuppance for the pair of horrid individuals, and when that did not fully happen, I found it to be a little unsatisfying.

However, the final shot of the film is absolutely dark and powerfully scary.

Michael Rooker was top of the line in the role.  His performance was frightening and executed perfectly.  The imagery was dark, brutal and nightmarish.  The belief that there were people like this in the world truly makes one doubt humanity.

Finding a rating for this film is tough.  It doesn’t feel right to give this one a “FUN TIME” rating, but I would not go to the “CLASSIC” rating either.  It also does not feel right to call this “OVERRATED” as I would consider this a (mostly) positive review.  So I am going to debut a new rating for this film that will cover it.  It is a….

 

tweener

 

Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer

Birdemic: Shock and Terror (2010)

Image result for birdemic movie poster rifftrax

I was struggling trying to determine what exactly I wanted to watch tonight.  Everything that I found was either too long or not what I wanted.  There were actually a bunch of creepy/scary films available, but I just did not feel like I was wanting to handle a movie with shock and terror in it.

So I played a film with those words in the title!

Birdemic: Shock and Terror is one of the worst movies ever made.  Thankfully, I have only seen it as a part of the special presentations by the RiffTrax Live guys, Michael J. Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett.  Even today, Birdemic: Shock and Terror is my favorite RiffTrax show I have seen.

Birdemic the movie is a film that is meant to pay homage to Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds, but it fails in just about every imaginable manner.  It takes around 45 minutes before we see any birds on the screen at all and when they finally do show up, they are possibly the worst special effects to find its way onto a movie screen.

Calling the acting wooden would be too good.  Alan Bagh (who plays Rod) is unbelievably robotic in his portrayal of the software salesman turned solar panel magnate who dates our lovely young model Nathalie (Whitney Moore) and these two stumble through the somewhat unaffected world where killer eagles are attacking people at gas stations, alongside the road and at motels.

This is truly a film that is impossible to describe.  The special effects, the sound quality (or lack thereof), the acting, the story, the consistent shots of people driving their cars for no determinable reason.

Thankfully, the RiffTrack guys make this a remarkably entertaining, making me laugh out loud at their hi-jinks and witty banter.  The best part though is when none of the three of them are able to make a joke because they are too busy laughing themselves at the horrible performance of Rod.

The reason behind the Birdemic, we guess, has to do with global warming as the film takes many opportunity to spread the word about how humans are affecting nature (including one of the most awkward allusions to Al Gore’s An Inconvenient Truth movie.

I love the RiffTrax performance and if you see Birdemic: Shock and Terror (which also somehow spawned a sequel), you must see the RiffTrax version.  That is because, scoring the movie itself only… it is …

putrescent

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Night School

Kevin Hart and Tiffany Haddish star in the brand new, we’ll say, comedy Night School.  Unfortunately, I did not find very many comedic elements to be had here.

Kevin Hart is Teddy, a high school dropout who has a great skill at sales.  His ability to charm people into purchasing things that they really did not need made him very successful.  However, when adversity falls upon him and he needs to find a new job, Teddy discovers that he needs a high school diploma to be hired.  He decides to go to night school to get his GED, but his struggles in learning, particularly in test taking, rear its ugly head once again in the classroom of night school teacher Carrie (Tiffany Haddish).

Teddy’s old high school rival Stewart (Taran Killiam) happens to be the principal of the school, who carries a bat and somehow can get away with intimidating and bullying the student body.  I found that character to be so unlikely that it really took me out of the movie.

Not that I was truly ever into the movie as I found this one to be stupid and dull.  The best parts of the film included the side stories of the other members of the night school class, in particular the ridiculousness of Rob Riggle, and desperate housewife looking for an escape from her home life Theresa (played by 24’s own Chloe, Mary Lynn Rajskub).  Other than that, there was not much to be had here.

The film was unbelievably predictable.  I had to use the restroom, and before I went, I thought to myself about what was going to happen.  I listed off several of these in my head.  When I cam back, I actually saw each and every one of the things I thought was going to happen, happen.  It was shocking how easily it was to know what was going to happen.

Predictability would still be fine if the film was funny, but there were so few moments of humor that I was shocked.  Between two of the funniest people in Hollywood today in Hart and Haddish to have a film so devoid of laughs in so sad.  Even in my theater, there were, at best, a few giggles here and there.  The potentially best scene with humor was then ruined with a gross out moment that I just do not find funny.

Hart and Haddish are charismatic individuals and they are usually funnier than this, but I just do not think the script was worth the time of these top line comedians.

Another major problem was that the film was released as a PG-13 film and there were many times that you could see that the words being said by the actors did not match what their mouths were saying.  They clearly edited out some F-bombs to make it down to PG-13, but they did it so poorly that it was obvious when it happened.  It was like the old days on television when they would have the film Die Hard on and you would hear John McClane say “Yippee Ki Yay, Mister Falcon.”  It is a silly way to keep the ratings in the family level.

There are a couple of positive messages hidden in the story, but it is so convoluted inside the rest of the stupid dialogue and plot points that it loses any sort of power.

Then the ending was so contrived it was just unbelievable.  I won’t spoil it, but it was a laughably easy finish.

In what could have been a really funny film, Night School was a huge flop despite a crew of funny people on screen.  I was counting the minutes for this one to be finished.

2 stars

EYG Top 10 Mark Wahlberg Films

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I saw this topic and I immediately thought that I was in trouble.  I actually considered changing the topic for the first time ever from Top 10 Mark Wahlberg Films to The Top 10 Worst Films with Mark Wahlberg.  I have never been a big Mark Wahlberg fan and I was not certain I could reach 10 films that I really liked.  I was also sure that I could easily find ten that I did not like.

In the end, I did have to stretch somewhat to get to 10 Mark Wahlberg films that I liked, but I also struggled with finding ten that I hated so I decided to just stick with the regular topic.  Here was the Top Ten Worst list anyway…

  1.  Transformers: The Last Knight
  2.  Planet of the Apes
  3.  Transformers:  Age of Extinction
  4.  Ted 2
  5.  Daddy’s Home 2
  6.  Contraband
  7.  Ted
  8.  Mile 22
  9.  The Perfect Storm
  10.  Entourage

Yeah, there are some films on this list that people like (aka Ted, Perfect Storm) but I just do not like either. And number 10 is a cheat really.  Numbers 8-9 aren’t terrible, so I did not feel I needed to readjust the topic (However, number one and two are two of the worst ever!)

So I went ahead to find the Top 10 Mark Wahlberg films.  I still had to cheat a little as you will see at number 10 and number 9.

 

Image result for daddy's home 1 movie#10.  Daddy’s Home.  I was about two-thirds of the way through this movie and was trying to figure out exactly what spot on the worst films of the year Daddy’s Home would occupy.  I am not a fan of Will Farrell either so this film had a double dose of trouble coming from me.  However, the third act suddenly found its voice and its humor and surprised the heck out of me.  It is not a good film by any accounts, but it did not end up making that worst films of the year list either so there is that.  This is one of the reasons why I try to sit through the entire film, even if I am hating on it so much because you never know when one might turn it around.

 

Image result for the departed#9.  The Departed.  This is a film that lots of people love, but I have never been a huge fan of.  I have only seen it once on home video and it was a time of my life where I was not that into this type of movie.  My guess is that if I saw it again, I would probably see more in it as so many others have.  I still remember it being a good film though and being surprised by it.

 

Image result for all the money in the world#8.  All the Money in the World.  Another film that I liked but did not love.  The film got a bit of a push because of the Kevin Spacey stuff, but Mark Wahlberg is still very solid in it.  The film really became Christopher Plummer’s movie because of his dramatic entry into the cast, but Wahlberg is important in the film as the go-between with Plummer and Michelle Williams.

 

Image result for 2 guns#7.  2 Guns.  You have to appreciate the pairing of Wahlberg with Denzel Washington.  Sure the film is, at best, an average film, but the relationship and the chemistry between Wahlberg and Washington elevated the movie to heights that other performers would not be able to accomplish.  Wahlberg and Washington were funny and entertaining and they made the movie better.

 

Image result for patriots day#6.  Patriots Day. We are getting closer to the true favorites of my list now.  Patriots Day was a really compelling film dealing with the bombings at the Boston Marathon.  It is a true story and, although Wahlberg does not play a real person (actually an amalgam of a bunch of people), he is an important piece to make the narrative flow well.  There is high drama and you connect immediately to Wahlberg and his “everyman” character who winds up at the most inopportune place and time.

 

Image result for pain and gain#5.  Pain and Gain.  I might have moved this even higher up my list if not for one important detail.  This is a true story about a group of horrible people but the film makes these people funny and play the terrible things they do as a joke.  If not for that, this would be one of my favorite Wahlberg films.  I certainly love the Rock in here and pairing those two up makes for a lot of sense.  If this were a fictional account, it would be so much better but I almost feel guilty for enjoying this Michael Bay film.

 

Image result for lone survivor#4.  Lone Survivor.  The biggest spoiler is right in the title of this movie.  A group of Navy SEALS head into Afghanistan on a mission that included both surveillance and the possible killing of the Taliban leader Ahmad Shah.  Again, by the title, you kind of know how that mission is going to end.  That does not take away from how dramatic, edge of your seat tense the film is.  This was the first film in the collaboration between director Peter Berg and Mark Wahlberg.

 

Image result for the fighter#3.  The Fighter.  This is a great film with an amazing cast including Wahlberg, Christian Bale and Amy Adams.  Wahlberg plays boxer Mickey Ward in this real life story of the early years of Ward’s career.  There is so much drama and excitement here and this is a remarkable film throughout.  Wahlberg chose the role because of his actual friendship with Mickey Ward and he provides, arguably, one of his very best performances.

 

Image result for deepwater horizon movie#2.  Deepwater Horizon.  I almost made this number one.  I really considered it.  This is the third collaboration between Peter Berg and Mark Wahlberg and this true story of a massive fire on an oil drilling rig and the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico resulting from that disaster.  This movie is completely engrossing and suspenseful from the first second until the final reel.  You are never sure what is going to happen and you are constantly amazed with what actually did.  I was absolutely surprised by how much I loved this movie and how much I was connected to the characters and their plights.  I knew there would be characters paying the ultimate price, but I felt for each of them as their time came.  It is a great film.

 

Image result for boogie nights penis shot#1.  Boogie Nights.  However, no matter how much I wanted to put Deepwater Horizon at number one, the correct answer to this puzzle is Boogie Nights.  Playing Dirk Diggler, Mark Wahlberg was able to shred the “Marky Mark” image and show that he was a real actor.  The film was amazingly rich with other performances as well from Burt Reynolds, John C. Reilly, Julianne Moore, Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Heather Graham, William H. Macy and Don Cheadle.  And the film ends with one of the most iconic shots in Hollywood history.

 

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Fahrenheit 11/9

Here is another really solid documentary for the year.  There have been several great docs that I have seen, but this one is a little less inspiring than some of the others.

In fact, this one leaves you with a sinking feeling. A deep depressing sense that our country is facing a serious threat from within.

I have always tried to avoid being political on EYG because it is the easiest way to create divisiveness and I do not want that.  However, Michael Moore’s newest documentary, Fahrenheit 11/9 cannot be analyzed without taking the steps into the world of politics.

The film itself is well crafted and tells a strong story of how we came to be where we are right now, with the presidency of Donald J. Trump and how easily it could become more than what we expect.

To be fair, Michael Moore spends a chunk of the doc focusing on other issues that would be considered tangential to Trump’s America.  This included the poison water crisis from Flint, Michigan, the school shooting at Parkland, Florida and the teacher strike in West Virginia.  Moore brings these back around to Trump eventually, but he is not the only person who he goes after in this doc.  Michigan governor Rick Snyder is portrayed as a serious villain in this piece and, if anything close to what is shown here is true, then that man needs to be removed via vote immediately.  Democrats are not free of Moore’s wrath either as he calls out Bill Clinton, Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton and other long-time established Democrats in Congress for their roles in bringing us Trump as president.

The Obama part was particularly difficult considering how Moore showed the hope from the people of Flint when Obama came to the city with the expectation of helping the people only to have a glass of water in a stunt at a press conference.  That was seen as a betrayal from the Flint people and helped suppress the vote int he 2016 election in a state where Hillary lost by just a handful of votes.

It was also very painful to see some of the cell phone footage from inside the Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School at Parkland as bullets are flying around these kids.  The students who then stepped forward ready to make change in the world are all the more inspiring after seeing this documentary.

It is amazing to listen to some of the insanity that comes out of the mouths of some of these people, in particular, our Commander in Chief.  The film paints a horrific vision of a possible future and one that is not all that difficult to imagine.  See the film for yourself and make your own mind up.

3.75 stars

Deliverance (1972)

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Burt Reynolds passed away recently at the age of 82.  I had never seen this iconic film from his oeuvre so I put it on the list to watch.

It was very disturbing of a film.

It started with the epic dueling banjos that was so fantastic.  About midway through the film, the horrible rape scene takes place (poor Ned Beatty) and the rest of the film was tense.

Honestly, the first part of the film featured Reynolds. but the second half of the film belonged to Jon Voight as Ed and Ned Beatty dealing with his own pain over what happened to him.  Burt was regulated to the sidelines with his injured leg.

I will say that the first part of Deliverance, after dueling banjos, was dull.  There was just too much canoeing going on.  It seemed to me that a lot of that could have been removed and it would have made the film a tighter feel.  However, once the hillbillies showed up with their plans of making poor Ned Beatty squeal, this film picked up the pace.

There is a lot of uncertainty in the film as well.  Drew (Ronny Cox) fell out of the canoe as the four friends reached the dangerous rapids.  Why was that?  Reynolds’ character claimed he was shot, but I am not sure of that.  I did not hear a shot fired nor was their any real evidence of that when they came across Drew’s body later.  It as a strange part of the story.

I have heard a lot of great word of mouth about this movie, but to me, it is, at best, okay.  The second half of the film was better and, of course, the Dueling Banjos song was tremendous.  Otherwise, there was the shock value of the rape and not that much more.

It is a solid film in the technical aspects, but I do not see it as one of the great films of all time. It certainly has some of the most iconic moments of all time, but moments do not necessarily make a movie.

overrated

 

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Misery (1990)

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Kathy Bates has had a great career, and Misery is one of the highlights.

In Misery, Kathy Bates created one of the most iconic and HORRIFYING CRINGE-WORTHY moments in movie history.  It was the hobbling scene where she took a sledgehammer to the ankles of James Caan, who was playing author Paul Sheldon.  It was a scene where, even when I knew it was coming, caused me to scream out in anguish.

The movie, which was basically the two main stars working in a confined room, never felt dull or boring.  It was completely engaging and breathtaking.

Paul, who had just finished his newest manuscript, was heading home through a blizzard when his car crashed.  Injured badly, Paul awoke in a bed being nursed back to health by Annie Wilkes.  She had plenty of answers to his questions that seemed reasonable as to why he was not in a hospital.  He legs had been badly broken and his shoulder separated but Annie was his number one fan and was dedicated to help him heal while the blizzard kept them isolated.

Of course, Annie was more than just the number one fan.  She was the proof that the work fan comes from the word FANATIC, as she showed her levels of crazy gradually.

Kathy Bates and James Caan are tremendous here.  Misery wound up being directed by Rob Reiner and adapted to the screen from The Princess Bride writer, William Goldman.  Interestingly enough, the hobbling scene was originally intended to be a decapitation instead and that caused a great deal of problem with many actors and actresses.  Reportedly, it was what led Bette Midler to drop out of the role of Annie.

Which turned out to be a great opportunity for Kathy Bates, who did win an Academy Award for the role.

Misery is such a taut thriller with so many great moments that you always remember, it is certainly one of the best Stephen King adaptations to make the big screen.  It has to be the biggest fear of every famous person that there is an Annie Wilkes in their fan club.  Quite an amazing film.

paragon

 

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