Category Archives: Daily Countdown

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #26

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#26

Another One Rides the Bus

Title: “Another One Rides the Bus”

Album: “Weird Al” Yankovic

Released: 1981

Parody: “Another One Bites the Dust” by Queen

Written: John Deacon/Al Yankovic

Genre: Rock/Comedy

Topic: misery of an overcrowded public transit bus.

“Another One Rides the Bus” was recorded live on the Dr. Demento Radio Show with Al playing the accordion and Jon “Bermuda” Schwartz banging away on the empty accordion case. Thanks to this interaction, Schwartz and Weird Al began a relationship that has continued to this day.

Lyrics

Ridin’ in the bus down the boulevards
And the place was pretty packed, yeah
I couldn’t find a seat, so I had to stand
With the perverts in the back

It was smellin’ like a locker room
There was junk all over the floor
We’re already packed in like sardines
But we’re stoppin’ to pick up more, look out

Another one rides the bus
Another one rides the bus
And another comes on and another comes on
Another one rides the bus
Hey, he’s gonna sit by you, another one rides the bus

There’s a suitcase pokin’ me in the ribs
There’s an elbow in my ear
There’s a smelly old bum standin’ next to me
He hasn’t showered in a year

Well, I think I’m missin’ a contact lens
I think my wallet’s gone
And I think this bus is stoppin’ again
To let a couple more freaks get on, look out

Another one rides the bus
Another one rides the bus
And another comes on and another comes on
Another one rides the bus
Hey, he’s gonna sit by you, another one rides the bus

Another one rides the bus
Another one rides the bus, ow
Another one rides the bus, hey, hey
Another one rides the bus, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey

The window doesn’t open and the fan is broke
And my face is turnin’ blue, yeah
I haven’t been in a crowd like this
Since I went to see The Who

I know I should’ve got off a couple miles ago
But I couldn’t get to the door
There isn’t any room for me to breathe
And now we’re gonna pick up more, yeah

Another one rides the bus
Another one rides the bus
And another comes on and another comes on
Another one rides the bus
Hey, he’s gonna sit by you, another one rides the bus

Source: Musixmatch

This led to Weird Al’s first TV appearance on the The Tomorrow Show with Tom Snyder…

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #27

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#27

This is the Life

Title: “This is the Life”

Album: Dare to Be Stupid

Released: 1984

Appeared: 1984 movie Johnny Dangerously

Written: Al Yankovic

Style Pastiche: 1920s jazz

Lyrics

I eat filet mignon seven times a day
My bathtub’s filled with Perrier
What can I say?
This is the life
I buy a dozen cars when I’m in the mood
I hire somebody to chew my food
I’m an upwardly mobile dude
This is the life

They say that money corrupts you
But I can’t really tell
I got the whole world at my feet
And I think it’s pretty swell

I got women lined up outside my door
They’ve been waitin’ there since the week before
Who could ask for more?
This is the life

You’re dead for a real long time
You just can’t prevent it
So if money can’t buy happiness
I guess I’ll have to rent it

Yeah, every day I make the front page news
No time to pay my dues
I got a million pairs of shoes
This is the life

I got a solid gold Cadillac
I make a fortune while I sleep
You can tell I’m a living legend
Not some ordinary creep

No way, I’m the boss, the Big Cheese
Yeah, I got this town on its knobby little knees
I can do just what I please
This is the life

That’s right, I’m the king, number one
I buy monogrammed Kleenex by the ton
I pay the bills, I call the shots
I grease the palms, I buy the yachts
One thing I can guarantee
The best things in life, they sure ain’t free
It’s such a thrill just to be me
This is the life
This is the life

https://genius.com/Weird-al-yankovic-this-is-the-life-lyrics

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #28

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#28

Fat

Title: “Fat”

Album: Even Worse

Reelased: 1988

Written: Michael Jackson/Al Yankovic

Parody: “Bad” by Michael Jackson

Genre: Pop/Rock/Comedy

The second iconic Weird Al parodies of Michael Jackson songs, “Fat” is one of Weird Al’s most recognizable songs. The video won Weird Al a Grammy for Best Concept Music Video. In the video, Weird Al parodied the video for “Bad”, using the same set.

Lyrics

Your butt is wide, well mine is too
Just watch your mouth or I’ll sit on you
The word is out, better treat me right
‘Cause I’m the king of cellulite
Ham on, ham on
Ham on whole wheat, all right

My zippers bust, my buckles break
I’m too much man for you to take
The pavement cracks when I fall down
I’ve got more chins than Chinatown

Well, I’ve never used a phone booth
And I’ve never seen my toes
When I’m goin’ to the movies
I take up seven rows

Because I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, come on (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, come on, you know (really really fat)
Don’t you call me pudgy, portly or stout
Just now tell me once again who’s fat?

When I walk out to get my mail
It measures on the Richter scale
Down at the beach I’m a lucky man
I’m the only one who gets a tan
If I have one more pie a la mode
I’m gonna need my own zip code

When you’re only having seconds
I’m having twenty-thirds
When I go to get my shoes shined
I gotta take their word

Because I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, come on (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it, you know (really really fat)
And my shadow weighs forty-two pounds
Lemme tell you once again who’s fat

If you see me comin’ your way
Better give me plenty space
If I tell you that I’m hungry
Then won’t you feed my face

Because I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, come on (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it, you know (really really fat)
When I sit around the house
I really sit around the house

You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, come on (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it, you know it (really really fat)
You know, you know (fat fat)
You know, come on (really really fat)

And you know all by myself I’m a crowd
Let me tell you once again

You know I’m huge (fat)
I’m fat, you know it (really really fat)
You know I’m fat, you know (really really fat)
You know I’m fat (fat)
I’m fat, you know it (really really fat)
And the whole world knows I’m fat and I’m proud
Just tell me once again who’s fat?

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #29

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#29

The Alternative Polka

Title: “The Alternative Polka”

Album: Bad Hair Day

Released: 1996

Genre: Polka/Comedy

Written:  Ivonil Machado Da Silva / Paula Stefanovich/Al Yankovic

Songs in Medley: “Loser,” “Sex Type Thing,” “All I Want to Do,” “Closer,” “Bang & Blame,” “You Oughta Know,” “Bullet with Butterfly Wings,” “Buddy Holly,” “My Friends,” “I’ll Stick Around,” “Black Hole Sun,” “Basket Case.”

Lyrics

Soy un perdedor! I’m a loser, baby!
So why don’t you kill me? Everybody!
Soy un perdedor! I’m a loser, baby!
So why don’t you kill me? HEY!

I am, I am, I am
I said I wanna get next to you
I said I’m gonna get close to you
You wouldn’t want me have to hurt you too
Hurt you too
I know you want what’s on my mind
I know you like what’s on my mind
I know it eats you up inside
I know, you know, you know, you know
Here I come, I come, I come, I come
Here I come, I come, I come, I come

‘Cause all I wanna do is have some fun
I’ve got a feeling I’m not the only one
All I wanna do is have some fun
I’ve got a feeling I’m not the only one
All I wanna do is have some fun
Until the sun comes up
Over Santa Monica Boulevard

HELP ME! I broke apart my insides
HELP ME! I got no soul to sell
HELP ME! The only thing that works for me
Help me get away from myself
I wanna (BOING) you like an animal
I wanna feel you from the inside
I wanna (BOING) you like an animal
My whole existence is flawed
You get me closer to god hey! Hey! Hey!

You bang, bang, bang, bang, bang
Blame, blame, blame
You bang, bang, bang, bang, bang
It’s not my thing so let it go!

‘Cause that love that you gave that we made
Wasn’t able to make it enough
For you to be open wide, no
And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me you’d hold me
Until you die, ’til you die
But you’re still alive
And I’m here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It’s not fair to deny me of the cross
I bare that you gave to me you oughta know
HEY!

Despite all my rage
I am still just a rat in a cage
Despite all my rage
I am still just a rat in a cage
And someone will say what is
Lost can never be saved despite all my rage
I am still just a rat in a cage

I love all of you hurt by the cold
So hard and lonely too
When you don’t know yourself

I don’t owe you anything!
I don’t owe you anything!
I don’t owe you anything!
I don’t owe you anything!

Black hole sun won’t you come
And wash away the rain black hole sun
Won’t you come, won’t you come
Black hole sun, black hole sun
Won’t you come
Black hole sun, black hole sun
Won’t you come
Black hole sun, black hole sun

Do you have the time to listen to me whine
About nothing and everything all at once?
I am one of those melodramatic fools
Neurotic to the bone no doubt about it
Sometimes I give myself the creeps
Sometimes my mind plays tricks on me
It all keeps all adding up
I think I’m cracking up
And am I just Paranoid am I just stoned?
Or am I just stoned?

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #30

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#30

Like a Surgeon

Title: “Like a Surgeon”

Album: Dare to Be Stupid

Released: 1985

Parody: “Like a Virgin” by Madonna

Written: Billy Steinberg / Tom Kelly/Al Yankovic

Genre: Pop/Comedy

Topic: Incompetent new intern

Rumor said that the original idea for this parody came from Madonna herself, as she asked someone when Weird Al was going to make “Like a Virgin” into “Like a Surgeon.”

Lyrics

I finally made it through med school
Somehow I made it through
I’m just an intern
I still make a mistake or two

I was last in my class
Barely passed at the institute
Now I’m trying to avoid, yah I’m trying to avoid
A malpractice suit

Hey, like a surgeon
Cuttin’ for the very first time
Like a surgeon
Organ transplants are my line

Better give me all your gause nurse
This patient’s fading fast
Complications have set in
Don’t know how long he’ll last

Let me see, that I.V.
Here we go time to operate
I’ll pull his insides out, pull his insides out
And see what he ate

Like a surgeon, hey
Cuttin’ for the very first time
Like a surgeon
Here’s a waiver for you to sign

Woe, woe, woe

It’s a fact I’m a quack
The disgrace of the A.M.A.
‘Cause my patient’s dying, yah my patient’s dying
Before they can pay

Like a surgeon, hey
Cuttin’ for the very first time
Like a surgeon
Got your kidneys on my mind

Like a surgeon, ooh like a surgeon
When I reach inside
With my scalpel, and my forceps, and re-tractors
Oh oh, oh oh, woe, oh

Ooh baby, yeah
I can hear your heartbeat
For the very last time

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #31

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#31

Bob

Title: “Bob”

Album: Poodle Hat

Released: 2003

Written: Al Yankovic

Style Parody: Bob Dylan

Genre: Folk/Rock/comedy

Topic: Palindromes, meaning it reads the exact same forwards and backwards.

This is a remarkable song as, if you are not keyed into the topic of the song, it does sound like a bunch of nonsense. However, every line of the song reads the same forward and backwards… and rhymes with the next one. Bob is a lyrical masterpiece from Weird Al.

Lyrics

I, man, am Regal, a German am I
Never odd or even
If I had a Hi-Fi
Madam, I’m Adam
Too hot to hoot
No lemons, no melon
Too bad I hid a boot
Lisa Bonet ate no basil
Warsaw was raw
Was it a car or a cat I saw?

Rise to vote, sir
Do geese see God?
Do nine men interpret? Nine men I nod
Rats live on no evil star
Won’t lovers revolt now?
Race fast safe car
Pa’s a sap
Ma is as selfless as I am
May a moody baby doom a yam

Ah Satan sees Natasha
No devil lived on
Lonely Tylenol
Not a banana baton
No X in Nixon
O stone, be not so
O Geronimo, no minor ego
“Naomi” I moan
A Toyota’s a Toyota
A dog, a panic, in a pagoda

Oh no, Don Ho
Nurse, I spy gypsies, run!
Senile felines
Now I see bees, I won
UFO tofu
We panic in a pew
Oozy rat in a sanitary zoo
God, a red nugget, a fat egg under a dog
Go hang a salami, I’m a lasagna hog

Source: Musixmatch

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #32

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#32

UHF

Title: “UHF”

Album: UHF

Released: 1989

Written: Al Yankovic

Genre: Rock

Style Parody: The Jackson’s “State of Shock” (featuring Mick Jagger)

Title track to Weird Al’s first motion picture, UHF, which flopped at the box office, but reached cult classic level over the years since.

Lyrics

Put down your remote control, throw out your TV Guide
Put away your jacket, there’s no need to go outside
Don’t you know that we control the horizontal
We control the vertical too
We gonna make a couch potato out of you
That’s what we going to do now

Don’t change the channel, don’t touch that dial
We got it all on UHF
Kick off your sneakers, stick around for a while
We got it all on UHF (on UHF)
Don’t worry ’bout your laundry, forget about your job (ah)
Just crank up the volume and yank off the knob (ah)
We got it all (we got it all), we got it all on UHF

Disconnect the phone and leave the dishes in the sink
You better put away your homework, prime time ain’t no time to think
All you do is make yourself a TV dinner
Press your face right up against the screen

We gonna show you things you ain’t ever seen
If you know what I mean, now

Don’t change the channel, don’t touch that dial
We got it all on UHF
Kick off your sneakers, stick around for a while
We got it all on UHF (on UHF)
Don’t worry ’bout your laundry, forget about your job (ah)
Just crank up the volume and yank off the knob (ah)
We got it all (we got it all), we got it all on UHF

You can watch us all day, you can watch us all night (ooh)
You can watch us any time that you please (ooh)
You can sit around and stare at the picture tube
‘Til your brain turns into cottage cheese, well, now

Don’t change the channel, don’t touch that dial
We got it all on UHF
Kick off your sneakers, stick around for a while
We got it all on UHF (on UHF)
Don’t worry ’bout your laundry, forget about your job (ah)
You gotta crank up the volume and yank off the knob (ah)
We got it all (we got it all), we got it all on UHF

We got it all on UHF (UHF)
We got it all on UHF (UHF)
We got it all on UHF (UHF)
We got it all on UHF (UHF)

We got it all on UHF (we got it all)
We got it all on UHF (UHF)
We got it all on UHF (we got it all)
We got it all on UHF (we got it all, we got it)

We got it all on UHF (we got it, we got it all)
We got it all on UHF (we got it all)
We got it all on UHF (ooh, on UHF)
We got it all on UHF

Source: Musixmatch

Daily Countdown Weird Al Songs #33

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#33

I Love Rocky Road

Title: “I Love Rocky Road”

Album: “Weird Al” Yankovic

Release: 1983

Parody: I Love Rock ‘n’ Roll by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts

Written: Jake Hooker / Alan Merrill / Alfred Yankovic

Genre: Rock ‘n’ Roll/Comedy

Topic: The love of ice cream, especially Rocky Road.

Special Appearance: “Musical” Mike Kieffer

Lyrics

I hear those ice cream bells and I start to drool
Keep a couple quarts in my locker at school
Yeah, but chocolate’s gettin’ old
Vanilla just leaves me cold

There’s just one flavor good enough for me, yeah me
Don’t gimme no crummy taste spoon
I know what I need

Baby, I love rocky road
So, weren’t you gonna buy half a gallon, baby?
I love rocky road
So, have another triple scoop with me, ow

They tell me ice cream junkies are all the same
All the soda jerkers know my name
When their supply is gone then I’ll be movin’ on
But I’ll be back on Monday afternoon, you’ll see
Another truck load’s comin’ in for me, all for me
I’m singin’

I love rocky road
So, weren’t you gonna buy half a gallon, baby?
I love rocky road
So, have another triple scoop with me, ow

Oh, make it talk

When I’m all alone, I just grab myself a cone
And if I get fat and lose my teeth that’s fine with me
Just lock me in the freezer and throw away the key
Singing

I love rocky road
So, weren’t you gonna buy half a gallon, baby?
I love rocky road
So, have another triple scoop with me

I love rocky road
So, weren’t you gonna buy half a gallon, baby?
I love rocky road
So, have another triple scoop with

I love rocky road
So, weren’t you gonna buy half a gallon, baby?
I love rocky road
So, have another triple scoop with

I love rocky road
So, weren’t you gonna buy half a gallon, baby?
I love rocky road
So, have another triple scoop with me

Source: Musixmatch

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #34

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#34

Polka Face

Title: “Polka Face”

Album: Alpocalypse

Released: 2010

Genre: Polka/Comedy

Written:  Adam Young / Alecia Beth Moore / Allan Peter Grigg / Benjamin Levin / Brandon Roy Melancon / Breyon Prescott / Cathy Dennis / Charles Burgess Kelley / Christopher A Stewart / Christopher Brian Bridges / Christopher M Henderson / Cristina Flores / David Wesley Haywood / Dwayne Carter / Edmund Koestscher / Faheem Najm / Fraser Lance Thorneycroft Smith / Gaetano Lama / Hillary Dawn Scott / Jacob Milan Taio Cruz / James Thomas Brown / Jamie Foxx / Jared Lincoln Cotter / Jason Joel Desrouleaux / Jay Sean / Jeremy David Skaller / Johan/Al Yankovic

Songs included: “Liechtensteiner Polka,” “Poker Face,” “Womanizer,” “Right Round,” “Day ‘n’ Nite,” “Need You Now,” “Baby,” “So What,” “I Kissed a Girl,” “Fireflies,” “Blame It,” “Replay,” “Down,” “Break Your Heart,” “Tick Tock Polka,” and “TikTok.”

Lyrics

Mum mum mum mah
Mum mum mum muh
Oh whoa oh oh oh

Can’t read my, can’t read my
No, he can’t read-a my polka face
(She’s got to love nobody)
Can’t read my, can’t read my
No he can’t read-a my polka face
(She’s got to love nobody)
P-p-p-polka face p-p-polka face (Mum mum mum muh)
P-p-p-polka face p-p-polka face, hey

Womanizer, woman-womanizer, you’re a womanizer
Oh, womanizer, oh, you’re a womanizer baby
You, you, you are
You, you, you are
Womanizer, womanizer, womanizer
(Womanizer)

Boy don’t try to front
I, I know just what you are (are are)
Boy don’t try to front
I, I know just what you are (are are)

You say I’m crazy
I got your crazy
You’re nothing but a
Womanizer

You spin my head right round, right round
When you go down, when you go down down
You spin my head right round, right round
When you go down, when you go down

Day and night
The lonely stoner seems to free his mind at night
He’s all alone through the day and night
The lonely loner seems to free his mind at night
At, at, at night

It’s a quarter after one, I’m a little drunk and I need you now
Said I wouldn’t call but I’ve lost all control and I need you now
And I don’t know how I can do without
I just need you now

And I was like baby baby baby
Baby baby baby
Baby baby baby
I thought you’d always be mine

So, so what, I’m still a rock star
I got my rock moves and I don’t need you
And guess what, I’m havin’ more fun
And now that we’re done, I’m gonna show you tonight
I’m alright, I’m just fine and you’re a tool
So, so what, I am a rock star
I got my rock moves and I don’t want you tonight

I kissed a girl and I liked it,
The taste of her cherry chapstick
I kissed a girl just to try it,
I hope my boyfriend don’t mind it
It felt so wrong, it felt so right,
Don’t mean I’m in love tonight
I kissed a girl and I liked it, I liked it

And I’d like to make myself believe
That planet earth turns slowly
It’s hard to say that I’d rather stay
Awake when I’m asleep
‘Cause everything is never as it seems

Blame it on the goose, gotcha feeling loose
Blame it on the ‘tron, gotchya me in the zone
Blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol
Blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol
Blame it on the vodka, blame it on the Henny
Blame it on the blue tap, got you feeling dizzy
Blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol
Blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol

Shawty’s like a melody in my head
That I can’t keep out
Got me singin’ like
Na na na na everyday
It’s like my iPod stuck on replay
Stuck on replay
Stuck on replay
Replay
Replay-ay-ay-ay

Baby, are you down, down, down, down, down?
Baby are you down?

I’m only gonna break break your break break your heart
I’m only gonna break break your break break your heart
I’m only gonna break break your break break your heart
I’m only gonna break your heart

Don’t stop, making pop
DJ blow my speakers up
Tonight, I’mma fight
Till we see the sun light
Tick tock, on the clock
But the polka don’t stop (no)
Yodel-yodel-lady-hoo
Yodel-yodel-lady-hoo

P-p-p-polka face p-p-polka face (mum mum mum mah)
P-p-p-polka face p-p-polka face
Oh no you can’t read my p-p-polka face
Talk about my polka face
P-p-p-polka face

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #35

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#35

Party in the CIA

Title: “Party in the CIA”

Album: Alpocalypse

Released: 2011

Parody: “Party in the USA” by Miley Cyrus

Written: Lukasz Gottwald / Claude Kelly / Jessica Cornish/Al Yankovic

Genre: Pop/Comedy

Topic: The dark, cloak-and-dagger operations of the Central Intelligence Agency

The dark comedic song is in direct opposition to the happy, upbeat music. This is a ton of fun and the animated video that was released with the song was hilarious.

Lyrics

I moved out to Langley recently
With a plain and simple dream
Wanna infiltrate some third-world place
And topple their regime

Those men in black with their matching suitcases
Where everything’s on a need-to-know basis
Agents got that swagger
And everyone so cloak and dagger

I’m feeling nervous but I’m really kinda wishing
For another undercover mission
That’s when the red alert came on the radio
And I put my earpiece on
Got my dark sunglasses on
And I had my weapon drawn

So I get my handcuffs, my cyanide pills
My classified dossier
Tapping the phones like, yeah
Shredding the files like, yeah

I memorized all the enemy spies
I’ve got to neutralize today
Yeah, it’s a party in the CIA
Yeah, it’s a party in the CIA

I’ve done a couple of crazy things
That have almost gotten me dismissed
Like terminate some head of state
Who wasn’t even on my list

Burn that microfilm, buddy, will you?
I’d tell you why but then I’d have to kill you
You need a quickie confession?
Well, start a water boarding session

No hurry on this South American dictator
I’ll assassinate him later
That’s when he walked right in my laser sights
And my silencer was on
And my silencer was on
And another target’s gone

Yeah, we’ve got black ops all over the world
From Kazakhstan to Bombay
Paying the bribes like, yeah
Plugging the leaks like, yeah

Interrogating the scum of the earth
We’ll break them by the break of day
Yeah, it’s a party in the CIA
Yeah, it’s a party in the CIA

Need a country destabilized?
Look no further, we’re your guys
We’ve got snazzy suits and ties
And a better dental plan than the FBI’s

Better put your hands up and get in the van
Or else you’ll get blown away
Staging a coup like, yeah
Brainwashing moles like, yeah

We only torture the folks we don’t like
You’re probably gonna okay
Yeah, it’s a party in the CIA
Yeah, it’s a party in the CIA

Source: Musixmatch

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #36

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#36

Don’t Download This Song

Title: “Don’t Download This Song”

Album: Straight Outta Lynwood

Released: 2006

Written: Al Yankovic

Genre: Comedy pop/Gospel

Style Pastiche: “We Are the World”, “Voices That Care”, “Hands Across America”, “Heal the World” and other similar charity songs

Topic: The illegal downloading of music from the internet

One of the more out of date Weird Al songs, Don’t Download This Song is still a personal favorite. Even with the song involving things that are not things anymore, this is funny and a great musical song.

Lyrics

Once in a while maybe you will feel the urge
To break international copyright law
By downloading MP3’s from file sharing sites
Like Morpheus or Grokster or LimeWire or KaZaA
But deep in your heart you know the guilt would drive you mad
And the shame would leave a permanent scar
‘Cause you start out stealing songs, and then you’re robbing liquor stores
And selling crack and running over school kids with your car

So don’t download this song
The record store’s where you belong
Go and buy the CD like you know that you should
Oh don’t download this song

Oh you don’t want to mess with the RIAA
They’ll sue you if you burn that CDR
It doesn’t matter if you’re a grandma or a seven year old girl
They’ll treat you like the evil, hard bitten criminal scum you are

So don’t download this song
Don’t go pirating music all day long
Go and buy the CD like you know that you should
Oh, don’t download this song

Don’t take away money from artists just like me
How else can I afford another solid gold Humvee?
And diamond studded swimming pools, these things don’t grow on trees
So all I ask is everybody, please

Don’t download this song (don’t do it, no, no)
Even Lars Ulrich knows it’s wrong (you can just ask him)
Go and buy the CD like you know that you should (you really should)
Oh, don’t download this song

Don’t download this song (Oh please don’t you do it)
Or you might wind up in jail like Tommy Chong (remember Tommy)
Go and buy the CD (right now) like you know that you should (go out and buy it)
Oh don’t download this song

Don’t download this song (no no no no no no)
Or you’ll burn in hell before too long (and you’d deserve it)
Go and buy the CD (just buy it) like you know that you should (ya cheap bastard)
Oh, don’t download this song

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #37

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#37

Stop Forwarding That Crap to Me

Title: “Stop Forwarding That Crap to Me”

Album: Alpocalyse

Release: 2011

Written: Al Yankovic

Genre: Dramatic, Theatrical Rock

Style Parody: Jim Steinman

Topic: Sending stupid things across the internet/email

Lyrics

Oh, the sand keeps fallin’ through the hourglass
And there’s no way you’re gonna slow it down
You say, “We gotta treasure each moment
Who knows how long we’re gonna be around?”
Yeah, you keep on telling me life is short
And it’s hard to disagree with what you say
But if time is so precious, why you wastin’ mine?
‘Cause I’m always reading, always deleting
Every useless piece of garbage that you send my way

Every stupid hoax (ooh), all those corny jokes
Stop forwarding that crap to me
Well, I don’t need tons of cringe-inducing puns (ooh)
Stop forwarding that crap to me
No, it isn’t okay if you brighten my day (ah)
With some cut and pasted hackneyed Hallmark poetry
And I didn’t request a personality test (ooh)
Stop forwarding that crap to me
(Ah-ah-ah)

You’re sending virus-laden, bandwidth-hogging attachments
To every single person you know (ah)
You’re passin’ ’round a link to some dumb thing on YouTube
That everybody else already saw three years ago (ah)
And wacky, badly photoshopped billboards
Were never that amusing to me (ah)
And I just can’t believe you believe those urban legends
But I have high hopes someone’ll point you towards Snopes
And debunk that crazy junk you’re spewing constantly

No, I don’t want a bowl of Chicken Soup For the Soul (ooh)
Stop forwarding that crap to me
Send more top ten lists and I’ll slash my wrists (ooh)
Stop forwarding that crap to me
Well, I’m sorry I can’t accept your paranoid rant (ah, ah)
And I don’t want the Neiman-Marcus cookie recipe
Won’t you kindly refrain? ‘Cause it’s hurting my brain
Stop forwarding that crap to me

Like glittery hearts and unicorns and pictures of somebody’s cat
Now tell me
In what alternate reality would I care about something like that?
And by the way
Your quotes from George Carlin aren’t really George Carlin
Mr. Rogers never fought the Viet-Cong
And Bill Gates is never gonna give me something for nothing (ah)
And I highly doubt some dead girl’s gonna kill me
If I don’t pass your letter along

Well, now I know you’re wishin’ I’ll sign your petition
But stop forwarding that crap to me
And I don’t wanna read your series of conspiracy theories
Just stop forwarding that crap to me
And your two million loser friends all have my address now (ah)
‘Cause you never figured out the way to BCC
Now I gotta insist (ooh)
Take me off of your list (ooh)
Stop forwarding that crap to me (ah)

just stop it now
(Stop forwarding that crap to me) oh, no
(Stop forwarding that crap to me) whoa

I can’t take it
(Stop forwarding that crap to me) oh, please
(Stop forwarding that crap to me)

At the risk of being slightly repetitious (ah)
Gonna ask you now to stop (stop)
Sending me that (crap)
I don’t want it (ah)
Don’t send it to me, no, don’t send it to me

Stop forwarding that crap to me, to me
(Ah-ah-ah)

Source: Musixmatch

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #38

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#38

Canadian Idiot

Title: “Canadian Idiot”

Album: Straight Outta Lynwood

Released: 2006

Parody: “American Idiot” by Green Day

Written:  Billie Joe Armstrong / Frank Edwin III Wright / Mike Ryan Pritchard /Al Yancovic

Genre: Rock/Comedy

Topic: Poking fun at stereotyes of Canadians.

Lyrics

Don’t want to be a Canadian idiot

Don’t want to be some beer swillin’ hockey nut
And do I look like some frost bitten hosehead
I never learned my alphabet from A to zed

They all live on donuts and moose meat
And they leave the house without packin’ heat
Never even bring their guns to the mall
And you know what else is too funny
Their stupid monopoly money
Can’t take ’em seriously at all

Well maple syrup and snow’s what they export
They treat curling just like it’s a real sport
They think their silly accent is so cute
Can’t understand a thing they’re talking aboot

Sure they got their national health care
Cheaper meds, low crime rates and clean air
Then again well they got Celine Dion
Eat their weight in Kraft macaroni
And dream of driving a Zamboni
All over Saskatchewan

Don’t want to be a Canadian idiot
We’ll figure out their temperature in Celsius
See the map they’re hovering right over us
Tell you the truth it makes me kinda nervous

Always hear the same kind of story
Break your nose and they’ll just say sorry
Tell me what kind of freaks are that polite
It’s gotta mean they’re all up to something
So quick before they see it coming
Time for a pre-emptive strike

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #39

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#39

Foil

Title: “Foil”

Release: 2014

Album: Mandatory Fun

Parody: “Royals” by Lorde

Written: Joel Little / Alfred Matthew Yankovic / Ella Marija Lani Yelich O’connor

Genre: Pop

Weird Al’s Foil goes from talking about wrapping food in aluminum foil so it will not spoil to talking about the Illuminati and New World Order. Quite the flip of script. The video is hilarious, featuring the one and only Patton Oswalt, as well as comedians Thomas Lennon, and Robert Ben Garant.

Lyrics

I never seem to finish all my food
I always get a doggie bag from the waiter
So I just keep what’s still unchewed
And I take it home, save it for later

But then I deal with fungal rot, bacterial formation
Microbes, enzymes, mould and oxidation
I don’t care, I’ve got a secret trick up my sleeve

I never bother with baggies, glass jars, tupperware containers
Plastic cling wrap, really a no-brainer
I just like to keep all my flavours sealed in tight

With aluminum foil (Foil)
Never settle for less
That kind of wrap is just the best
To keep your sandwich nice and fresh

Stick it in your cooler (Cooler)
Eat it when you’re ready
Then maybe you’ll choose (You’ll choose, you’ll choose, you’ll choose)
A refreshing herbal tea
Mmm, lovely!

Oh, by the way, I’ve cracked the code
I’ve figured out these shadow organizations
And the Illuminati know
That they’re finally primed for world domination

And soon you’ve got black helicopters comin’ cross the border
Puppet masters for the New World Order
Be aware: There’s always someone that’s watching you
And still the government won’t admit they faked the whole moon landing
Thought control rays, psychotronic scanning
Don’t mind that, I’m protected cause I made this hat

From aluminum foil (Foil)
Wear a hat that’s foil lined
In case an alien’s inclined
To probe your butt or read your mind

Looks a bit peculiar (‘culiar)
Seems a little crazy
But someday I’ll prove (I’ll prove, I’ll prove, I’ll prove)
There’s a big conspiracy

Source: Musixmatch

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #40

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#40

I Lost on Jeopardy

Title: “I Lost on Jeopardy”

Album: “Weird Al” Yankovic In 3D

Released: 1984

Parody: “Jeopardy” by the Greg Kihn Band

Written:  Al Yankovic / Steve Wright / Gregory Stanley Kihn

Genre: Pop-Rock/Comedy

Guest Vocal: Don Pardo

Lyrics

Oh…
I was there, to match my intellect, on national TV
Against a plumber, and an architect, both with a Ph.D
I was tense, I was nervous
I guess it just wasn’t my night
Art Fleming gave the answers
Oh, but I couldn’t get the questions right-ight-ight

I lost on Jeopardy
Baby
(Oooh)
I lost on Jeopardy
Baby
(Oooh)

Well I knew I was in trouble now
My hope of winning sank
‘Cause I got the Daily Double now
And then my mind went blank
I took Potpourri for one hundred
And then my head started to spin
Well, I’m givin’ up. Don Pardo
Just tell me now what I didn’t win
Yeah, yeah

I lost on Jeopardy
Baby
(Oooh)
I lost on Jeopardy
Baby
(Oooh)

That’s right Al–you lost! And let me tell what you didn’t win: a twenty
Volume set of the Encyclopedia International, a case of Turtle Wax, and a
Year’s supply of Rice-a-Roni, the San Francisco treat. But that’s not all!
You also made yourself look like a jerk in front of millions of people!
And you brought shame and disgrace on your family name for generations to come!
You don’t get to come back tomorrow! You don’t even get a lousy copy of your
Home game! You’re a complete loser!

Don’t know what I was thinkin’ of
I guess I just wasn’t too bright
Well, I sure hope I do better
Next weekend on The Price Is Right-ight-ight

I lost on Jeopardy
Baby
(Oooh)
I lost on Jeopardy
Baby
(Oooh)
I lost on Jeopardy
Baby…

Source: Musixmatch