Author Archives: Doc

Invincible S4 E1

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“Making the World A Better Place”

I have had a interesting relationship with the show Invincible. Where as a lot of people love the show and swear that it is one of the best shows on television, I am not as enamored with it. While I have enjoyed most of the seasons, I have found that the blood becomes excessive and is unnecessary in many cases. There are too many scenes where the blood feels like it is just there to say that it is there. It feels like professional wrestling in a lot of cases. When blood is used sparingly, it can create a compelling piece of the story, but when it is overused, it loses a lot of its impact.

After watching the first episode of season four of Invincible, I did not think they over did the blood and that it was fairly well used as a whole.

I was unaware that Invincible had already debuted on Amazon Prime last week with a three episode drop. Episode four was also released before I knew it so I am officially a bit behind. However, I do have a long list of shows currently on the watchlist, so I will be spreading out the next three episodes over the next several days to a week.

I did find the character work in this episode to be very solid. I enjoyed Mark’s progression from the end of last season to now where he is fighting himself over his use of deadly force. Of course, the end of the episode placed Mark in a situation where he had to kill a person. It was very much a Man of Steel- Superman snapping the neck of Zod moment.

I like how the show with as much violence as it has is not afraid to make that internal struggle with its main character.

With Eve’s powers glitching badly, we get another, albeit well used, superhero trope to deal with. I do think Eve’s father needs a punch in the face.

The Guardians… their timing can’t be any worse. They showed up right at the end of the fight with the dinosaur guy and seemed to be standing behind Mark as he is struggling to decide if he needed to kill the guy to save the world from the Sequids. Get there sooner guys.

I hope the woman who attacked the power plant’s story is not just over. It sounded as if there was a reason behind her trying to steal the energy and I expect that story to get picked up somewhere down the line.

Then, Cecil’s stupidest decision at the end of the third season, keeping Conquest alive and buried in an underground vault. There was no way that wasn’t coming back to haunt him. I wonder if he will tell Mark now that Conquest has escaped and left butt-naked into space. Or will this be just another secret that Cecil will hide?

Good start to the season. I hope it continues to value story over spectacle, especially when it comes to blood.

Jury Duty Presents Company Retreat E1, E2

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Spoilers

“Onboarding”

“Team Building”

I started a new program on Amazon Prime today, watching the first two episodes of Jury Duty Presents Company Retreat.

This is the second season of Jury Duty, which was one of the best surprise series from 2023. It was a hilarious series that was one of the most intriguing concepts on television. The idea for the first Jury Duty, a real person is called for Jury Duty and every other person involved in the show is an actor.

In this season, instead of being called for jury duty, our real person who is unaware that this is really a TV show is named Anthony Norman and he is a temp worker applying for a job at a company called “Rockin’ Grandma’s Hot Sauce” and he goes with the workers on a company retreat.

He was set up as the assistant to Kevin, who winds up leaving the retreat in embarrassment, leaving Anthony in his stead.

I have to say, the first episode was feeling too over the top and I was not sure if I wanted to watch the rest of the series. The second issue was better for me and started to pick up the story better.

It just felt as if there was just too much ridiculousness to accept that Anthony would still be going along with it.

The excuse for why there is a documentary crew in tow and everyone speaks to a camera at times is that the owner Doug was retiring and passing the CEO seat to his son, Dougie. That made sense, but there is a limit to what one could expect someone to react to.

Of course, last season, the “winner” received a huge cash prize for succeeding and being a good person, and Anthony certainly feels like a solid person too. Seeing how he will react to the craziness coming might be worth sticking out. There are only a total of 8 episodes, so I plan on finishing this up.

Shrinking S3 E9

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Spoilers

“Daddy Issues”

There was a feeling of finality in this episode of Shrinking.

Paul convinces Gabby to come back to work and then offers her the practice once again. However, he did not call her out on ditching her dream of setting up a trauma center. Something that Liz came to yell at him about.

Paul kept talking about having one more week before his retirement and spoke about moving. That was not something I remember as a chance and I don’t know how I would feel about Shrinking without Harrison Ford. I am assuming that it is just storyline, but I am not sure.

Jeff Daniels returned as Jimmy’s father, bringing up plenty of conflict from Jimmy’s childhood. When Jimmy found out that his dad was not going to go to the actual graduation ceremony in order to go on a fishing trip, Jimmy was even more down than he was before.

Worse yet, when his father told Jimmy that he really liked Sofi, way more than Tia (who apparently always saw him in the same light as Jimmy did), Jimmy broke up with Sofi, and he did it in a very cold manner. I would not blame Sofi if, when he invariably comes begging back, she dismisses it and kicks him to the curb. Jimmy letting his daddy issues interfere with something that was potentially great is more immature than I thought Jimmy could be. You could see that his father’s presence was not bringing out the best side of him.

Sean got the job as a a sous chef. He hesitated to accept it because of his friendship with Jorge, who worked with him in the food truck, and would cost him that job. Jorge did not take the news well, but Sean did not react with animosity or anger as he would have before, showing his own growth with his mental health.

It was nice to see the softer side of Paul in this episode. I hope he is not leaving at the end of this season, which has only two more to go.

The Pitt S2 E12

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Spoilers

“6:00 PM”

We left last week with a patient holding Emma in a headlock. Dana to the rescue. Unfortunately, her efforts might get herself into trouble as she gave Versed that she had been carrying around in her pocket. This tense scene was strong and brought conflict between Robby and Dana. Katherine LaNasa was amazing in her performance this week as she railed against everyone that might hint at the fact that she took the step a touch too far.

The patient is a jerk and was revealed to have been on cocaine and alcohol at the time of his accident. This apparently could lead to psychotic behavior. He was not very understanding about it.

Speaking of Robby, he seems to be waffling about leaving the ER. He was scheduled to head on a motorcycle run on vacation, but it feels as if he is finding reasons to stick around. I am not sure what the major issue Robby has right now, but he is completely unsure.

There was a nice story of an elderly couple who came to the ER after a car accident. The story expanded into a question whether this couple was capable of taking care of themselves any more. Their daughter, played by Britney Young (from GLOW), expressed concern that they refused to listen to her concerns.

There is only three more episodes of season 2 and I expect some big character moments coming up, especially featuring Robby.

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #93

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#93

Generic Blues

Title: Generic Blues

Album: UHF

Release: 1989

Written: Al Yankovic

Style: Blues; typical 12-bar, slow-tempo structure, and harmonica solos.

Another one of those original songs that sneaks under the radar. I do love this song. It is such a funny song with a parody of the style of Blues.

Lyrics

I woke up this morning
Then I went back to bed
Said I woke up this morning
Then I went right back to bed
Got a funny kind of feelin’ like I got broken glass in my underwear
And a herd of wild pigs is trying to chew off my head
You know what I’m sayin’

Well I ain’t got not money
I’m just walkin’ down the road
Said I ain’t got no money, honey
So I’m just walking down this lonely old road
Well, I wish I could get me some money
But I forgot my automated teller code

I was born in a paper sack in the bottom of a sewer
I had to eat dirt clods for breakfast, my family was so poor
My daddy was a waitress, my mama sold bathroom tiles
My brothers and sisters all hated me ’cause I was an only child

I got the blues so bad, woo
Kinda wish I was dead
Maybe I’ll blow my brains out mama
Or maybe I’ll, yeah maybe I’ll just go bowlin’ instead

I’m just a no good, scum sucking, nose picking, boot licking,
Sniveling, groveling, worthless hunk of slime

Nothing but a low-down beer bellied, bone headed, pigeon toed,
Turkey necked, weasel faced, worthless hunk of slime

Guess I pretty low self image
Maybe it’s a chemical imbalance or something, I
I should probably go and see a doctor about it when I’ve got the time
Make it talk
Aw, make it talk, son, make it talk
OK, now make it shut up

Plagues and famine and pestilence always seem to get me down
I always feel so miserable whenever I’m around
I wish somebody would come along, stick a pitchfork through my brain
I’d flush myself right down the toilet, but I’d just clog up the drain

I got the blues so bad
Kinda wish I was dead
Maybe I’ll blow my brains out mama
Or maybe I’ll go bowling
Or I just might go bowling
Maybe I’ll just rent some shoes and go bowling
Maybe I’ll join a league, enter a tournament, put on a stupid looking
Shirt and go bowling instead
Yeah

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #94

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#94

Truck Drivin’ Song

Title: “Truck Drivin’ Song”

Written: Al Yankovic

Album: Running With Scissors

Released: 1999

Parody style: Country Music/truck songs

This is one of those secretively funny original songs at the end of the album that don’t get as much attention as some of the bigger parodies or style pastiches. Yet, it is really funny, setting up the image of a big, old truck driver in his dresses and with his makeup.

Lyrics

Lyrics

I’m drivin’ a truck
Drivin’ a big ol’ truck
Pedal to the metal, hope I don’t run out of luck
Rollin’ down the highway until the break of dawn
Drivin’ a truck with my high heels on

My diesel rig is northward bound
It’s time to put that hammer down
Just watchin’ as the miles go flyin’ by
I’m ridin’ twenty tons of steel
But it’s sure hard to hold the wheel
While I’m still waiting for my nails to dry

Oh, I always gotta check my lipstick in that rear view mirror
And my pink angora sweater fits so tight
I’m jammin’ gears and haulin’ freight
Well, I sure hope my seams are straight
Lord, don’t let my mascara run tonight

Because I’m drivin’ a truck
Drivin’ a big ol’ truck
Smokey’s on my tail and my accelerator’s stuck
Got these eighteen wheels a-rollin until the break of dawn
Drivin’ a truck with my high heels on

Oh, I don’t mind when my crotchless panties creep right up on me
And my nipple rings don’t bother me too much
But when I hit those big speed bumps
My darling little rhinestone pumps
Keep slippin’ off the mother-lovin’ clutch

But still I’m drivin’ a truck
Drivin’ a big ol’ truck
Headin’ down the interstate, just tryin’ to make buck
Wearin’ feather boas with sequins and chiffon
While I’m drivin’ a truck with my high heels on

I’m drivin’ a truck
Drivin’ a truck
Got a load to carry and some eyebrows left to pluck
And I’m late for my appointment down at the hair salon
So I’ll be drivin’ a truck with my high heels on

Source: LyricFind

EYG Favorite Comic Cover of the Week

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March 26

What a haul of comic books this week. I got over 50 books this week, though there are several variant covers involved. Last week, there were no variant covers int he medal winners, but this week there are two of the three.

It is also surprising because officially, I picked up like seven Superman/Spider-Man #1s, and five MidKnight Man #1s with Mark Spears, and none of them made the medal platform this week. Amazing.

A bunch of the also-rans, including one that I really wanted to give a medal to, but just came up short.

Also-Rans: Hyde Street #11 (this is the one that really came close), Superman/Spider-Man #1 (multiple covers), MidKnight Man #1 (Cover A was my favorite of these), W0rldtr33 #19, Feral #21 (cover A), Feral (Cover B), White Sky #2, Return to Sleepy Hallow #5, and Universal Monsters: Phantom of the Opera #2

Bronze Medalist

Ripcord #2

Cover art by Jorge Fornes

What a beautiful cover with the wolf dominating the pink sky, blood dripping from its fangs. The shadowy figure standing in silhouette of the sun. All of this is just great. Jorge Fornes has been carving out a good year for himself.

Silver Medalist

The Peril of the Brutal Dark #2

Variant cover C

Cover art by Leandro Fernandez

Any time I spot a variant cover on the stands that just grabs my attention, it has a good chance of ending up on this list. I love the black and white cover that really gave me a noir vibe.

Gold Medalist

Final Boss #5

Variant cover G

Cover art by Tyler Kirkham

This book was in my box at In This Issue. I did not order the variant cover. I usually have the cover A pulled for me. I don’t know why this was in my box, but I am not complaining about it. What a bloody, brutal and awesome cover featuring Invincible.

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #95

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#95

Buy Me a Condo

Title: “Gonna Buy Me a Condo”

Written: Al Yankovic

Album: Weird Al Yankovic In 3D

Released: 1984

Style: This is a style parody of Bob Marley and other reggae music

One of the wonderful hidden gems on the In 3D album. Buy Me a Condo satires the American lifestyle.

Lyrics

Gonna buy me a condo
Gonna buy me a Cuisinart
Get a wall-to-wall carpeting
Get a wallet full ‘o credit cards
I gonna buy me a condo, never have to mow de lawn
I gonna get me da T-shirt wit’ de alligator on

Wo, used to live in Jamaica But I don’t live dere no more
Had to change me lifestyle
Do t’ings I never done before
So now I’m just a lonely Rastaman
Living in dis American town
Gonna sell me Bob Marley records
Gonna get me some Jackson Browne

I gonna buy me a condo
Gonna buy me a Cuisinart
Get a wall-to-wall carpeting
And get a wallet full ‘o credit cards, eh
I gonna buy me a condo, never have to mow de lawn
I gonna get me da T-shirt wit’ de alligator on

Wo, gonna cut off me dreadlocks
T’row away all me ganja
I’ll have a Tupperware party
Maybe join me a health spa
I’ll get a bowl of plastic fruits
And a microwave oven, too
Then I’ll have the neighbors over for a weenie barbecue

Gonna buy me a condo
Gonna buy me a Cuisinart
Get a wall-to-wall carpeting
Get a wallet full ‘o credit cards, oh
I gonna buy me a condo, never have to mow de lawn
I get a funny little T-shirt wit’ de alligator on

Ain’t gonna work in de field no more
Gonna be Amway distributor
Ain’t gonna work in de field no more (no, no)
Gonna be Amway distributor

Ja, ja, ja, life is so very hard
I need a (ja) ja, ja, ja jacuzzi in me back yard

Oh, I gonna buy me a condo
Gonna buy me a Cuisinart
Get a wall-to-wall carpeting
Get a wallet full ‘o credit cards, eh
I gonna buy me a condo, never have to mow de lawn
I gonna get me da T-shirt wit’ de alligator on

What’d you say?

I gonna buy me a condo
I gonna buy me a Cuisinart
Get a wall-to-wall carpeting
Get a wallet full ‘o credit cards, oh
I gonna buy me a condo, never have to mow de lawn
I gonna get me da T-shirt wit’ de alligator on

What’d you say?

I gonna buy me a condo
Gonna buy me a Cuisinart
Get a wall-to-wall carpeting
And get a wallet full ‘o credit cards, oh
I gonna buy me a condo, never have to mow de lawn
I gonna get me da T-shirt wit’ de alligator on

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #96

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#96

Craigslist

Title: Craigslist

Written: Al Yankovic

Released: 2009

Style parody: The Doors

Fact: Doors keyboardist played keyboards on the studio recording of the song.

Album: Alpocalypse

This song was released before the album among a group of songs called Internet Leaks, which included four new videos.

The song is an amazing style parody of The Doors. So much so that you might think it is a stright up parody of a specific song.

Lyrics

Whoa, yeah!

You’ve got a ’65 Chevy Malibu
With automatic drive
A custom paint job, too

I’ll trade you for my old wheelbarrow
And a slightly used sombrero
And I’ll even throw in a stapler, if you insist

Craigslist!
I’m on Craiglist, baby, come on!
Yeah

Well, we shared a quick glance
Saturday at the mall
I never took a chance
Never approached you at all

You were a blonde half-Asian with a bad case of gas
I was wearin’ red Speedos and a hockey mask
Come on, let’s find that love connection that we missed

On Craigslist!
Yeah, Craigslist, come on!
I’m on Craigslist
Oh, baby, maybe you are too!
Be bom ba chomb cadonk bin bam boo!

An open letter to the snotty barista
At the Coffee Bean on San Vacente Boulevard:
I know there were twenty people behind me in line
But I was on a cell phone call with my mother
Didn’t you see me hold up my index finger?
That means, “I’ll order my soy decaf hazelnut latte in just a couple minutes”
So, what’s with the attitude, lady?
No tip for you!

Got a trash can of Styrofoam peanuts
You can have ’em for free
You can drop by on the weekend
And pick ’em up from me
But the trash can ain’t part of the deal
Only givin’ you the peanuts
Get real!
Don’t have no Hefty bag, so bring your own
Don’t bug me with questions on the phone
Don’t ask for help, don’t waste my time
And don’t complain, ’cause they won’t cost you a dime
Just ask yourself:
Do you want my Styrofoam peanuts?
You can have my Styrofoam peanuts
Do you want my Styrofoam peanuts?
You can have them all

They’re on Craigslist, yeah!
Craigslist!
Ow, baby, come on!
I’m on Craigslist, Craigslist, Craigslist!
I’m on Craigslist, Craigslist, Craigslist, now

Craigslist!

Source: Musixmatch

Daredevil: Born Again S2 E1

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Spoilers

“The Northern Star”

Daredevil: Born Again premiered its first episode of season two tonight on Disney + and I am all in already.

This was a great first episode which featured some exciting action, some intriguing characters, and enough suspense to build on moving ahead.

Matt Murdock is missing. Or at least, he is not showing his face around New York. Meanwhile, the Mayor of New York, Wilson Fisk, has armed up the battle against vigilantes and has empowered his brutal strike force to be able to do whatever they want. It is kind of close to home these days.

Matt and Karen Page are working together, in the shadows, trying to bring Fisk down. Daredevil (with the awesome DD on his costume chest plate) kicked off the episode by boarding a ship that was smuggling weapons into New York. When the captain realized that Daredevil was there, he sank the ship. He said it was his orders.

Fisk was involved in the arms smuggling, of course, so he is anxious to salvage what had sunk. When the attorney general came to see him, it seemed as if Fisk was in some trouble, with words like oversight being bandied around.

However, into the office strolled Matthew Lillard, suddenly taking over the scene completely. Lillard is playing someone named Mr. Charles, and he apparently has some big time connections in the MCU. While he was grandstanding in the Mayor’s office, the attorney general received a phone call after which he immediately folded. During the one-sided conversation, we heard him say the name Ms. de Fontaine.

What??????

Obviously, this is a reference to Valentina Allegra de Fontaine, the character played by Julia Louis-Dreyfus in Falcon & the Winter Soldier, Thunderbolts and Wakanda Forever. Last we saw Val, she was head of the CIA and putting together the New Avengers, in a backhanded, manipulative manner. I did not expect that name drop to come, but it only added to the curiosity and intrigue that I felt for Mr. Charles. I look forward to seeing this guy moving forward.

Heather Glenn is back and being a horrendous person. She is on the hook in the Kingpin’s organization doing dirty work, such as falsifying the psych report on Swordsman to make it look like he is not a balanced individual. Yet, it seemed that Heather may be the one who is less than balanced as she is hallucinating images of Muse. I hope this use of Muse will be able to rebuild him from the character assassination that took place in season one. The way Muse was written and the lack of development of Muse was easily the worst part of season one. Maybe this will be a fascinating way to bring the specter of Muse back in a scary way. Plus, who deserved it more than Heather?

The episode ended with the AVTF beating up Cherry at the end, but not before he was able to signal Matt to come help him. Matt showed up in his Daredevil outfit, but Cherry was having a heart attack, which distracted Matt. The AVTF agents were able to get down the distracted DD and peeled off his mask, finding out that Daredevil was Matt Murdock. Before they were about to put a bullet in Matt’s head, several sniper-like bullets came through the window and killed the agents.

It was a shocking end to the episode and I, like I am sure everyone, thought this was Frank Castle. However, when the knife came flying into the room with the symbol on it, with the words “You’re welcome” written on it as well, I realized it was not Frank Castle who saved Matt’s life.

It was Bullseye.  Benjamin “Dex” Poindexter himself. The man who shot and killed Foggy in season one. It certainly appeared as if Bullseye could be part of Daredevil’s team to oppose Mayor Fisk, proving the old adage that the “enemy of my enemy is my friend”… well, maybe not friend. Reluctant ally? Blood feud enemy?

This was a great kick off to the new season. I loved Matthew Lillard and just how brutal Daredevil is. I am excited about seeing the return of Jessica Jones, who is not in this episode. Can’t wait for Krysten Ritter to reprise her Netflix role. Jessica Jones is actually one of my favorite comic characters and I loved season one of her show. Season two was okay, and I never saw the third one, but I am so pleased that Jessica Jones is back in the MCU.

Paradise S2 E7

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Spoilers

“The Final Countdown”

Sadly, this is the penultimate episode of season 2 of Paradise on Hulu. It has been so great that I don’t want to see it end. We get some major events occurring in episode 7.

Xavier & Teri are reunited and are on their way back to Colorado. Of course, first things first… they had to get Bean, who was being held by Gary the Mailman. Xavier wanted to just blow him away, but Teri had a more diplomatic path. She talked to Gary and dealt with the emotions he was revealing, and confronted him over the murder of Enos. Gary cried and accepted the fate, and never got his head blown off. Bonus for Gary.

Meanwhile, we were seeing how Sinatra was continually manipulating everyone. She meets with Link and they have a tense back and forth. However, Sinatra makes a shocking discovery… or at least a possible discovery… is Link her supposedly dead son Dylan? Could that be? Could this be the variable that brings Sinatra down?

The outside forces are preparing for their attack… maybe cause Link enjoyed that apple pie so much.

It sure seemed as if Gabriela stabbed Jane in a shower, and left her bleeding out and dead. Now, there is no confirmation that Jane is dead and she feels like that type of supervillain that you can’t just expect to be killed by a stab wound or two. You have got to finish her off when you have a chance. So while she could be gone now, I would not be surprised if she crawled her way out of that shower.

We got a flashback to see more of President Cal Bradford before his murder. It is always great to see James Marsden in Paradise, so every flashback with him is thoroughly welcome. Cal was inspecting everything with Sinatra and making like a prophet and calling that the bunker would go down one day. Surely this is meant as some foreshadowing for what is to come.

This finale should be full of surprises and action. Maybe we will finally find out who the mysterious “Alex” is, as Sinatra arrived at a location, put on a jacket, and greeted Alex. This was after Link had told her that he was after Alex. I have no idea who or what Alex is, but I can’t wait to find out.

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #97

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#97

(This Song’s Just) Six Words Long

Title: “(This Song’s Just) Six Words Long”

Written: Rudy Clark/Al Yankovic

Genre: Pop

Parody: “Got My Mind Set On You” by George Harrison (Originally recorded by James Ray in 1962)

Album: Even Worse

Released: 1988

The first parody in the Top 100 is a parody of George Harrison’s big hit in 1987, Got My Mind Set on You. I am a big Beatles fan so the song by Harrison was a personal favorite and Al’s version was very funny.

Lyrics

This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long

Couldn’t think of any lyrics
No I never wrote the lyrics
So I’ll just sing any old lyrics
That come to mind, child

You really need words
Whole lotta rhyming words
You gotta rhyme so many words, mm-mm
To do it, to do it, to do it, to do it
To do it, to do it right, child

This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long

I know that you’re probably sore
‘Cause I didn’t write any more
I just didn’t get to complete it
So that’s why I gotta repeat it

This song is just six words long (six words long)
This song is just six words long (six words long)

Oh I make a lotta money
They pay me a ton of money
They’re payin’ me plenty of money
To sing this song, child

I gotta fill time
Three minutes worth of time
Oh, how will I fill so much time, mm-mm
I’ll throw in a solo, a solo, a solo
A solo, a solo here

This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long

This song’s got nothin’ to say
But I’m recording it anyway
I know if I put my mind to it
I know I could find a good rhyme here

Oh, you gotta have-a music
You need really catchy music
This song has got plenty of music
But just six words, child

And so I’ll sing’ em over
And over and over and over
And over and over and over, mm-mm
And over and over and over
And over and over and over again

Six words long, six words long
Six words long, six words long
Six words long, six words long

This song is just six words long
It’s just six words long

Source: LyricFind

Daily Countdown: Weird Al Songs #98

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#98

Jackson Park Express

Title: Jackson Park Express

Written: Al Yankovic

Album: Mandatory Fun

Style Pastiche: Cat Stevens; Harry Chapin

Release: 2013

Jackson Park Express is one of the longer songs Weird Al has done. It runs 9 minutes and 4 seconds. It is an epic love story between two people who see each other on a bus for the first time. The romance lasts until the woman gets off the bus, without ever speaking to the man.

Ah, love.

Lyrics

Tuesday morning, 8:15
I was riding to work on the
Jackson Park Express
Seemed like any other day
Then my whole world changed
In a way I never could have guessed
‘Cause she walked in
Took the seat right across the aisle
I knew we had a special connection
The second I saw her smile

She smiled as if to say
“Hello, haven’t seen you on this bus before”
I gave her a look that said
“Huh, life is funny, you never know what’s in store
By the way, your hair is beautiful
I bet it smells like raisins”

She looked at me in a way that asked
“Did you have a nose job or something?
I’m only asking, cause your nose looks slightly better
Than the rest of your face”
I arched my eyebrow, ever so slightly
Which was my way of asking
“Do you want my old Hewlett-Packard printer?
It still works, kinda
And I got a bunch of ink cartridges left”

Then, she let out a long sigh
Which, I took to mean, “Uh”
“Mama, what is that deodorant you’re wearing?
It’s intoxicating
Why don’t we drive out to the country sometime?
And collect deer ticks in a zip-lock baggie”, oh yeah

I gave her a penetrating stare
Which could only mean
“You are my answer, my answer to everything
Which is why, I’ll probably do very poorly
On the written part of my driver’s test”

Yes, it all happened
On the Jackson Park Express
On the Jackson Park Express
On the Jackson Park Express
On the Jackson Park Express

I knew she was starting to fall for me
‘Cause she crinkled her nose, which unmistakably meant
“Baby, lets wear each other’s clothes
And speak in a thick German accent
And, maybe someday we can own and operate
Our own mobile pet-grooming service”
I couldn’t hold back my feelings
I gave her a look, that said
“I would make any sacrifice for your love
Goat, chicken, whatever
I could never hold you close enough
Let’s have our bodies surgically grafted together
Oh, surgically grafted together”

She picked up a newspaper, and started reading to herself
Which I’m sure, was a way of telling me
“When you’re cold, I will warm you
When you’re shivering, I will hold you
When your nauseous, I will give you Pepto-Bismol every hour
For as long as the symptoms persist”
Oh, I, I never, ever want to see you cry
So, please let me cauterize your tear ducts with an arc welder
Then, I glanced down, at her shirt, for a second
In a way that clearly implied
“I like your boobs”

Yes, it all happened
On the Jackson Park Express
On the Jackson Park Express
On the Jackson Park Express
On the Jackson Park Express

I cleared my throat quietly, and then, I looked away
And I’m sure it was obvious to her, just what I was trying to say
I was trying to say, “Hey
I’d like to make a wall-sized mural out of all the dead skin cells
That you slough off while you sleep at night”
Whoa-o-Oh, “I’d like to rip you wide open
And french-kiss every single one of your internal organs
Oh, I’d like to remove all your skin, and wear your skin, over my own skin
But not in a creepy way”

Then, I’m pretty sure, she looked at me, out of the corner of her good eye
And, though, she never spoke a word, this is exactly what I heard
She was saying, “Oh!
I wanna make out with you, in an abandoned toll-booth, in the middle of a monsoon
I wanna ride dolphins with you, in the moonlight
Until the staff at Sea World kicks us out
I want you inside me, oh, like a tapeworm”

I pointed to the side of my mouth, as a way of indicating
“Hey, I think you got something on the side of your mouth”
She licked the corner of her lips, as if to say
“Here?”, I nodded, implying, “Yeah, you got it”

And, then the bus stopped, at 53rd Street, and she got up suddenly
“Where are you going?”, pleaded my eyes, “Baby, don’t you do this to me
Think of the beautiful children we could have someday
We could school them at home, raise them up the right way
And protect them from the evils of the world
Like Trigonometry and Prime Numbers, oh no
Baby, please don’t go”

She brushed my leg, as she left the bus
I’m sure that was her way of saying
“I’m sorry this just isn’t working out
You’re suffocating me
I need some space to find out what life’s all about
So, goodbye forever, my love”

And deep inside, I knew she was right
It was time for us both to move on
And no, I never got her number, oh no no
She never bothered to leave her address, oh
But, as long as I live, I’ll never forget
Those precious moments we shared together

On the Jackson Park Express
On the Jackson Park Express
On the Jackson Park Express
On the Jackson Park Express
On the Jackson Park Express
On the Jackson Park Express
On the Jackson Park Express
On the Jackson Park Express

Source: LyricFind