Album: George Fest: A Night to Celebrate the Music of George Harrison
Style: pop/rock/uptempo soul
Performed: George Fest tribute concert on September 28, 2014
The first song on this list that was not written (at least in part) by Weird Al. Weird Al performed this at the George Fest tribute concert at the Fonda Theater in Los Angeles. Al was one of several other performers covering tracks from the former Beatle. Al also sang on the version of The Traveling Wilburys’ song, “Handle With Care.” “What is Life” was one of my favorite Georege Harrison songs and seeing the live performance by Weird Al was a great addition to it for me.
It is a straight cover of the song, without any comedic undertones.
Lyrics
What I feel, I can’t say But my love is there for you anytime of day But if it’s not love that you need Then I’ll try my best to make everything succeed
Tell me, what is my life without your love Tell me, who am I without you, by my side
What I know, I can do If I give my love now to everyone like you But if it’s not love that you need Then I’ll try my best to make ev’rything succeed
Tell me, what is my life without your love Tell me, who am I without you, by my side Tell me, what is my life without your love Tell me, who am I without you, by my side
What I feel, I can’t say But my love is there for you any time of day But if it’s not love that you need Then I’ll try my best to make everything succeed
Tell me, what is my life without your love Tell me, who am I without you, by my side Oh tell me, what is my life without your love Tell me, who am I without you, by my side
What is my life without your love Tell me, who am I without you, by my side
[fade:] Oh tell me, what is my life without your love Tell me who am I without you by my side
I went downtown today to see an art exhibit opening at the Maquoketa Art Experience. This would not typically be something that would attract my attention. However, one of the main topics of the exhibit really appealed to my geeky side.
I also knew the artists of the works. James Tenney is the school resource officer for the school district where I work and we have a connection with our love of geek culture. Tenney was a big fan of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, so I wore my TMNT shirt in his honor. The first he said to me today, after thanking me for coming, was “great shirt!” He then proudly showed me his TMNT socks, his Spider-Man tie and his Star Trek tie pin.
Officer Tenney has worked at the Maquoketa school for several years now. My friend Darin directed him towards me when he first started because of the similarity of our fandom. Darin had told me that Tenney was an artist, but I had no idea at what level he was.
Just the other day, we were both outside with a group of kids at the middle school and Officer Tenney called me over. There was a student of mine there with him. He asked me if she had been behaving herself lately, and when I said that she had been much better lately, Tenney pulled out a small box where he kept the small sketch pad and he sketched her a quick drawing of Batman. She was excited over the drawing, the doodle took about a minute or so to finish. I know he has done this for many other students, quickly sketching characters such as Wolverine, Spider-Man or such. He uses it as a great way to build that rapport with kids who are excited about the small treasure he provided them with.
It was that day that Officer Tenney told me about his opening on Sunday at the Maquoketa Art Experience from 2-4 and invited me to come on down and see his art.
What is cool is that he was sharing the exhibit with his youngest daughter, MJ. They told a sweet story about how their art studios at their home were right next to each other. MJ’s work was less superhero-like and more of the dragon/anime work.
Water color was the answer James gave me as his favorite medium to work in, but he had several other examples of other styles including oils, ballpoint pen and computer graphic.
James told me a story at a comic con where he had his work being displayed of an older gentleman who came over to him and, in referencing his work, pointed out the strong jawlines he had on display and then the man told James that his work was like “Jack Kirby’s work.” Even today, you could see how that comment lit James up. There is not much more of a compliment you can give to a comic art fan than to compare him to the “King.”
There was a wide variety of subjects on the walls and tables of the Maquoketa Art Experience. There were pictures of Spider-Man, Venom, Hobgoblin, Loki, Godzilla, Thor (as a baby), Ghost Rider, Transformers, Turtles, Daffy Duck, Gambit, Slimer from Ghostbusters, Joe Fixit, as well as many others.
The exhibit will be up for the months of May and June at the Maquoketa Art Exhibit. It is an impressive display featuring some of the great characters of the 20th/21st Century. Superheroes are the present day mythology and it is awesome that there are people who love them enough to keep the energy going.
You should stop down and see the full collection if you have some time over the next couple of months.
Some images from the show:
One of his favorite pieces, James told me he spent many MCU moviescreating this artwork.
As I was going through the list of songs on the Top 100, I discovered a mistake in the list. Instead of cutting a song that absolutely deserves its spot on the list, I decided to make this special exception for Weird Al and make it a Top 100 with 101 songs in it. Thus, Polka Power becomes the first ever 1/2 entry on our Daily Countdown lists and the only Daily Countdown Two-a-day.
Title: “Polka Power”
Album: Running With Scissors
Released: 1989
Genre: Polka/Comedy
Songs: “The Twelfth Street Rag,” “Wannabe,” “Flagpole Sitta,” “Ghetto Supastar (That Is What You Are),” “Everybody (Backstreet’s Back),” “Walkin’ On the Sun,” “Intergalactic,” “Tubthumping,” “Ray of Light,” “Push,” “Semi-Charmed Life,” “The Dope Show,” “MMMBop,” “Sex and Candy,” “Closing Time,” and “W.A.Y. Moby Polka.”
Lyrics
Yeah, well, I’ll tell ya what I want, what I really really want (So tell us what ya want, what ya really really want) I’ll tell ya what I want, what I really really want (So tell us what ya want, what ya really really want) I want to ha, I want to ha, I want to ha, I want to ha I want to really, really, really, want to zigga zigga, ah! If you want to be my lover, you gotta get with my friends Make it last forever, friendship never ends If you want to be my lover, you have got to give Taking is too easy, but that’s the way it is. Hey!
I’m not sick, but I’m not well. And I’m so hot, ’cause I’m in hell. I’m not sick, but I’m not well. And it’s a sin to live so well.
Ghetto superstar, that is what you are, Coming from afar, reaching for the stars. Run away with me, to another place We can rely on each other, uh huh From one corner to another, uh huh
Everybody (yeah) Rock your body (yeah) Everybody Rock your body right. Backstreet’s back, all right! All right!
So don’t delay, act now, supplies are running out But now, if you’re still alive, six to eight years to arrive And if you follow, there may be a tomorrow But if the offer’s shun, you might as well be walking on the sun Might as well be walking on the sun!
I get knocked down, but I get up again, You’re never gonna keep me down I get knocked down, but I get up again You’re never gonna keep me down I get knocked down, but I get up again You’re never gonna keep me down I get knocked down, but I get up again You’re never gonna keep me down
Quicker than a ray of light Quicker than a ray of light Quicker than a ray of light
I want to push you around, well I will, well I will I want to push you down, well I will, well I will I want to take you for granted I want to take you for granted Yeah, yeah, well I will
I want something else To get me through this semi-charmed kinda life, baby baby I want something else I’m not listening when you say good-bye.
There’s lots of pretty, pretty ones That want to get you high But all the pretty, pretty ones Will leave you low and blow your mind We’re all stars now in the dope show We’re all stars now in the dope show
Mmmbop, do floppa do wop Do be dop ah Do wap, do zap ah, do Yeah-ee yeah Mmmbop, do be ‘zap ah, do wop Do be dop ah Do wop, doom zap ah, do
I smell sex and candy here Who’s that lounging in my chair? Who’s that casting devious stares in my direction? Mama, this surely is a dream Yeah, yeah mama, this surely is a dream Dig it, yeah mama, this surely is
Closing time One last call for alcohol So finish your whiskey or beer Closing time You don’t have to go home But you can’t stay here I know who I want to take me home I know who I want to take me home I know who I want to take me home Take us home.
Released: As a theme song for his 1997 Saturday morning children’s TV show.
Album: Running With Scissors
Genre: pop/rock
This fell into the top 20 of the previous list, Top 100 TV Show Themes. When I first was creating that list, I almost didn’t think about it as a theme because it was more of a song than theme. Al has used this as an intro to his concerts since.
Lyrics
Oh, this is a story ’bout a guy named Al And he lived in a sewer with his hamster pal But the sanitation workers really didn’t approve So he packed up his accordion and had to move
To a city in Ohio where he lived in a tree And he worked in a nasal decongestant factory And he played on the company bowling team And every single night he had a strange, recurring dream
Where he was wearing leiderhosen in a vat of sour cream But that’s really not important to the story
Well, the very next year he met a dental hygenist With a spatula tattoed on her arm (on her arm) But he didn’t keep in touch, then he lost her number Then he got himself a job on a tater tot farm
And he spent his life savings on a split-level cave 20 miles below the surface of the Earth (of the Earth) And he really makes a mighty fine jelly bean and pickle sandwich For what it’s worth
Then one day Al was in the forest, trying to get a tan When he heard the tortured screaming of a funny little man He was caught in a bear trap and Al set him free And the guy that he rescued was as grateful as can be
And it turns out he’s a big-shot producer on TV So he gave Al a contract and what do you know? Now he’s got his own very Weird Al Show!
The song is fun as a satirical look at the paparazzi and entertainment news outlets like TMZ, but also take the other side of the fence with celebrities aren’t always great either.
Lyrics
You’re sort of famous A minor celebrity And so it only makes sense The world would be obsessed with every single thing you do
They’re running ’round With their camcorders in the night They lurk impatiently In hope in that they just might See something real embarrassing you do
The bad hair day and sweat-stained t-shirt That’s the story that They’re gonna feature With exclusive pics Of your flabby behind You think you’re all alone But that’s right when you’ll find
A bunch of paparazzi Popping out of nowhere Cameras in your face And then suddenly You’re on TMZ You’re on TMZ
Following you When you’re walking down the street And asking stupid questions While you’re trying to eat So you cover your face Thinking to yourself “Hey, isn’t this creepy?”
And they’re out there praying You’ll have a big meltdown And take ’em on a little car chase Through this whole town They’ll be there with you When you’re going to jail First on the scene For every wardrobe fail
You just picked up some transvestite Seconds later It’s up on the website Get a vegas wedding A quickie divorce And they’ll be sneaking in Snapping pictures, of course
And if they ever catch you Picking your nose Or stumbling down the street On a drunken spree You’re on TMZ Stalking you, just waiting by your front door Trailing you through airport security They’re with TMZ They’re with TMZ
Oh, let me tell you It’s getting to the point Where a famous person can’t Even get a D.U.I Or go on a racist rant Those guys are all around So you really shouldn’t dare Go to every club in town If you’ve lost your underwear
Seems that every single time A star decides to shave her head Or ram their car into a tree They’re on TMZ If they catch you peeing in the bushes Later on, that night Well, I guarantee You’re on TMZ You’re on TMZ You’re on TMZ Every single celebrity Knows they’re gonna be There on TMZ
This upbeat original song is about the type of tabloid newspapers that were such a huge thing during the 1980s.
Lyrics
I was waiting in the express lane With my twelve items or less At the checkout counter at the local grocery store I was only passin’ by
But a paper caught my eye And I learned a few things I never knew before It said
Your pet may be an extra-terrestrial It said The ghost of Elvis is living in my den You can learn to cope with stress And you can beat the IRS
And the Incredible Frog Boy is on the loose again Ohhh Midnight Star It’s in the weekly Midnight Star Aliens from outer space are sleeping in my car Midnight Star, I wanna know, I wanna know!
Eat jelly doughnuts and lose twenty pounds a day Hear the story of the man born without a head And top psychics all agree
That the telephone company
Will have a brand new service that lets you talk to the dead
Ohhh Midnight Star
You can believe it if you read it in the weekly Midnight Star
They’re keeping Hitler’s brain alive inside a jar Midnight Star, I wanna know, I wanna know!
Midnight Star I wanna know Ohhh Midnight Star Well don’t ya know that I read it, I read it in the weekly Midnight Star?
The UFOs have landed, and we’ll tell you where they are Midnight Star I wanna know I wanna know Ohhh Midnight Star Well, you can read all about it in the weekly Midnight Star
You can use your ESP to learn to play guitar I wanna know I wanna know (Ahhh Midnight Star) I wanna know I wanna know
I wanna know I wanna know (Ahhh Midnight Star) I wanna know I wanna know
Enquiring minds like mine wanna know (You can read it you can read it you can read it in the Midnight Star) I wanna know I wanna know
I wanna know I wanna know (You can read it you can read it you can read it in the Midnight Star) I wanna know I wanna know
I wanna know I wanna know (You can read it you can read it you can read it in the Midnight Star) I wanna know I wanna know
I wanna know I wanna know (You can read it you can read it you can read it in the Midnight Star)
Written: Lady Gaga /Jeppe Laursen/ Fernando Garibay/Paul “DJ White Shadow” Blair/Al Yankovic
Album: Alpocalypse
Released: 2011
Parody: “Born This Way” by Lady Gaga
A parody that almost did not happen. Al had sent the parody to Lady Gaga’s people, but they rejected it without Lady Gaga hearing it. When Lady Gaga did hear the parody, she gave her blessing. While Weird Al does not have to get artists permission to do a parody, he always apporached the aritst/company as a sign of respect.
Lyrics
My mama told me when I was hatched Act like a superstar Save your allowance, buy a bubble dress And someday you will go far Now on red carpets, well, I’m hard to miss The press follows everywhere I go I’ll poke your eye out with a dress like this Back off and enjoy the show!
I’m sure my critics will say it’s a grotesque display Well they can bite me, baby, I perform this way I might be wearin’ Swiss cheese or maybe covered with bees It doesn’t mean I’m crazy, I perform this way (‘from this way)
Ooh, my little monsters pay lots ’cause I perform this way Baby, I perform this way (perform this way) Ooh, don’t worry, I’m okay, hey, I just perform this way I’m not crazy, I perform this way
I’ll be a troll or evil queen I’ll be a human jelly bean ‘Cause every day is Halloween for me
I’m so completely original My new look is all the rage I’ll wrap my small intestines ’round my neck And set fire to myself on stage I’ll wear a porcupine on my head On a W-H-I-M And for no reason now I’ll sing in French Excusez-moi, qui a PT (express yourself)
Got my straight jacket today, its made of gold lame No, not because I’m crazy, I perform this way I strap prime rib to my feet, cover myself with raw meat I’ll bet you’ve never seen a skirt steak worn this way
Don’t be offended when you see My latest pop monstrosity I’m strange, weird, shocking, odd, bizarre I’m Frankenstein, I’m Avatar There’s nothing too embarrassing I’ll honestly do anything But wear white after Labor Day ‘Cause baby, I perform this way
Hope you won’t think it’s cliche if I go nude today Don’t call the cops, now, baby, I perform this way No reason I should regret all the attention I get I’m not completely crazy, I perform this way, yeah
I perform this way-hey, I perform this way-hey I’m always deviating from the norm this way-hey I perform this way-hey, I perform this way-hey I’m really not insane, I just perform this way-hey
Style Parody: 1960s Surf rock like the beach Boys or Jan and Dean.
This one may not have aged well. It is a satire of the American gun culture, but with the accumulation of shooters in the country, the joke might hit harder than intended. It is still quite funny with the juxtaposition of the ark lyrics and the upbeat, sunny music.
Lyrics
Got an AK-47, well you know it makes me feel alright Got an Uzi by my pillow, helps me sleep a little better at night There’s no feeling any greater Than to shoot first and ask questions later Now I’m trigger happy, trigger happy every day
Well, you can’t take my guns away, I got a constitutional right Yeah, I gotta be ready if the Commies attack us tonight I’ll blow their brains out with my Smith and Wesson That ought to teach them all a darn good lesson Now I’m trigger happy, trigger happy every day
Oh, I accidently shot daddy last night in the den I mistook him in the dark for a drug-crazed Nazi again Now why’d you have to get so mad? It was just a lousy flesh wound, Dad You know, I’m trigger happy, trigger happy every day
Oh, I still haven’t figured out the safety on my rifle yet Little Fluffy took a round, better take him to the vet I filled that kitty cat so full of lead We’ll have to use him for a pencil instead Well, I’m so trigger happy, trigger happy every day
Come on and grab your ammo What have you got to lose? We’ll get all liquored up And shoot at anything that moves
Got a brand new semi-automatic weapon with a laser sight Oh, I’m prayin’ somebody tries to break in here tonight I always keep a Magnum in my trunk You better ask yourself, do you feel lucky, punk? Because I’m trigger happy, trigger happy every day
trigger, trigger happy Yes I’m trigger, trigger happy (Oh baby, I’m) trigger, trigger happy Yes I’m trigger, trigger happy (Oh I’m so) trigger, trigger happy Yes I’m trigger, trigger happy Better watch out, punk, or I’m gonna have to blow you away Better watch out, punk, or I’m gonna have to blow you away Better watch out, punk, or I’m gonna have to blow you away Better watch out, punk, or I’m gonna have to blow you away
Songs: “Sledgehammer,” “Sussudio,” “Party All the Time,” “Say You, Say Me,” “Freeway of Love,” “What You Need,” “Harlem Shuffle,” “Venus,” “Nasty,” “Rock Me Amadeus,” “Shout,” “Papa Don’t Preach.”
I listened to this one forever during my college days.
Lyrics
You could have a big dipper Going up and down all around the bends You could have a bumper car bumping This amusement never ends
I wanna be your sledgehammer Why don’t you call my name? Oh, let me be your sledgehammer This will be my testimony, yeah, yeah
There’s a girl that’s been on my mind all the time Su-su-sudio, oh-oh Now she don’t even know my name But I think she likes me just the same Su-su-sudio, whoa-oh
And my girl wants to party all the time Party all the time, party all the time My girl wants to party all the time, party all the time She parties all the time
Say you, say me Say it for always, that’s the way it should be Say you, say me Say it together naturally
We’re going riding on the freeway of love Wind’s against our back We’re going riding on the freeway of love In a big Cadillac
That’s why you need, ooh That’s why this what you need, I’ll give you what you need
Yah, yah, yah, do the Harlem polka, everybody now Yah, yah, yah, do the Harlem polka
She’s got it, yeah baby, she’s got it Well, I’m your Venus, I’m your fire What’s your desire?
Nasty, nasty boys don’t mean a thing Oh, you nasty boys Nasty, nasty boys don’t ever change Oh, you nasty boys
I like this part
Ooh, rock me Amadeus Ooh, rock me Amadeus Ooh, rock me Amadeus, ooh
Shout, shout, let it all out These are the things I can do without, come on I’m talking to you, come on
Please papa don’t preach, I’m in trouble deep Papa don’t preach, I’ve been losing sleep But I’ve made up my mind, I’m keeping my baby Oh, I’m gonna keep my baby I’m gonna keep my baby
Songs in medley: “Twelfth Street Rag,” “State of Shock,” “Sharp Dressed Man,” “What’s Love Got to Do with It,” “Method of Modern Love,” “Owner of a Lonely Heart,” “We’re Not Gonna Take It,” “99 Luftballons” (sung in German), “Footloose,” “The Reflex,” “Bang Your Head (Metal Health),” and “Relax”.
Lyrics
You’re takin’ to me good, Just like you know you should. You get me on my knees, Please, baby, please.
She looks so great, every time I see her face. She put me in a state (ooh, state of shock)
Top coat. Top hat. I don’t worry, ’cause my wallet’s fat. Black shades. White glove. Lookin’ sharp. Lookin’ for love. They come a-runnin’ just as fast as they can, ‘Cause every girl’s crazy ’bout a sharp-dressed man, hey!
Whoo! Ah ha!
Oh, what’s love, got to do, got to do with it? What’s love but a second-hand emotion? What’s love got to do, got to do with it? Who needs a heart, when a heart can be broken?
M E T H O D O F L O V E, It’s the method of modern love.
Owner of a lonely heart. Owner of a lonely heart, Much better than the Owner of a broken heart. Owner of a lonely heart.
We’re not gonna take it. No! We ain’t gonna take it. We’re not gonna take it, any more.
Neun und neunzig luftballons Auf ihrem Weg zum Horizont. Denkst du vielleicht Grad an mich. Dann singe ich ein Lied fur dich.
Now I gotta cut loose. Footloose. Kick off my Sunday shoes. Please! Louise! Pull me off-a my knees. Jack! Get back! Come on, before we crack! Loose! You’re blues. Ev’ry body cut footloose!
So why don’t you use it. Try not to bruise it. Find time, don’t lose it.
Bang your head. Metal health’ll drive ya mad. Bang your head. Metal health’ll drive ya mad.
Relax, don’t do it. When you wanna go to it. Relax, don’t do it. When you wanna come. Relax, don’t do it. When you wanna sock it to it. Relax, don’t do it. When you wanna come. When you wanna come. When you want to come.
…All greased up and ready to sing their brains out….
I finished off the final season of Sha Na Na this afternoon with the six remaining episodes I had to see in season 4. I have to say that it was a really fun last few months as I worked my way through the playlist from Pattyoc01 on YouTube. While they were not always the best of quality, they were always fun and gave me flashes of nostalgia from when I was a young boy watching these in syndication. Sha Na Na was technically the first concert I ever attended (with my Dad at the Five Flags Center in Dubuque, Iowa) so I am very happy to have had a chance to watch these again.
Again, as I mentioned in the last post, some of the songs were songs that I had not heard before (or at least did not recognize). They did repeat a couple of songs in these episodes, including Runaway, Hand Jive, and Under the Boardwalk. We got to hear Chico sing again. He has not been a featured singer in the final season. Sure he was one of the lesser used voices overall in the show, but he got more than he has this year. I wonder if that was because of the absence of Dirty Dan.
We got quite a few Screamin’ Scott performances in this last handful of episodes. It was funny, but he wore that green suit in three episodes consecutively, and they were all on the street songs. I wonder if they recorded those all on the same day.
It is also interesting how many different outfits Screamin’ Scott wore. I mean, most of the group had one or two basic outfit that they wore, but Scott is always all over the place with jump suits and bright colors. And not just in the comedy skits either.
Of the guests, the one I liked the best of this group was Scatman Cruthers. I did not know what he was going to do, but he ended up singing and he was great. He played a ukulele and sang the blues. I know he sang the theme song to Hong Kong Phooey, but I did not expect him to do it here, but he was tremendous.
Other guests in these episodes included Mary Wells, The Spinners, Billie Davis Jr & Marilyn Macoo, Peaches and Herb, and Kim Carnes.
Another surprise was Pamela Meyers singing “It’s My Party and I’ll Cry If I Want To”. While Meyers had sung songs before, she was out on the street all by her self. We could hear the background vocals of Sha Na Na, but there was no sign of any of them. I wonder if that was the first time someone sang a song without any sight of any of the group?
Sha Na Na was inducted into the EYG Hall of Fame this year in the April 1 Legends class. I had a lot of fun with the boys over these four seasons.
Parody: “You Got It (The Right Stuff)” by New Kids on the Block.
Written: Maurice Starr/Al Yankovic
Style: Pop/Boy Band
There have been plenty of original songs that Weird Al parodied that I have either did not like or did not know. You Got It (The Right Stuff) is a perfect example of a song that I disliked that Weird Al made better with his parody.
And what can be a better topic for a song than the white stuff in an Oreo cookie?
Lyrics
The white stuff The white stuff
The first one was a sweet one Second one was a blast Soon I finished off the bag, ate ’em up real fast You can see ’em in my teeth Tell it when I talk Had so many my pancreas just went into shock
I love the white stuff, baby In the middle of an Oreo I love the white stuff, baby It’s the most delicious thing I know
I’ve had a zillion or two In my life, they’re so right My teeth are all rotted clear through But who cares? What else am I supposed to do?
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Oreo Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, the white stuff Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Oreo What’s in the middle? The white stuff
The first time that I tried it Got a big sugar buzz Nothing gets me high as that sandwhich cookie does But I love the filling most I rub it on my roast Mix it in with my coffee and spread it on my toast
I love the white stuff, baby In the middle of an Oreo I love the white stuff, baby Take some with me everywhere I go
Might get a pimple or two Well, so what? It’s all right Now Twinkies and Ding Dongs won’t do All I need… You know what it is
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Oreo Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, the white stuff Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Oreo Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, the white stuff Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Oreo What’s in the middle? The white stuff
One time I was in the checkout line Behind Steven Seagal Once I’m pretty sure Mr. Jonah Hill Was in the very next bathroom stall My best friend’s brother Well, he was an extra in Wayne’s World 2 My neighbour’s baby sitter Dated three of the guys in Motley Crue I swear Jack Nicholson Looked right at me at a Laker’s game
I got a lame Lame claim to fame
Check it out, I bought a second hand toaster From a guy who says he knows Brad Pitt I got me an email from the prince of Nigeria Well, he sure sounded legit My sister used to take piano lessons From the second cousin of Ralph Nader Last year I threw up in an elevator Next to Christian Slater Well guess what, my birthday and Kim Kardashian’s Are exactly the same
I got a lame Lame claim to fame A really lame Lame claim to fame
Once at a party, my dentist accidentally Sneezed on Russell Crowe I posted first in the comments On a YouTube video I tried to sit by Steve Buscemi But he told me this seat’s taken I know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy Who know a guy who knows a guy who know Kevin Bacon
I had a car that used to belong To Cuba Gooding Jr.’s uncle A friend of mine in high school Had jury duty with Art Garfunkel One time I was staying in the same hotel As Zooey Deschanel I used the same napkin dispenser As Steve Carell at a Taco Bell Well I don’t mean to brag but Paul Giamatti’s plumber knows me by name
I got a lame Lame claim to fame A really lame Lame claim to fame I’m talking lame Lame claim to fame A really really really lame Lame claim to fame
Fact: Background vocals were provided by Lisa Popeil, the daughter of Sam Popeil, who this song was about.
Lyrics
I need a vegematic! I need a pocket fisherman! I need a handy appliance That’ll scramble an egg while it’s still inside its shell! (Operators are standing by. How does that make you feel?) Help me. Mr. Popeil!
I wanna shine some pennies! I wanna mend some leather! I wanna Krazy-glue my head to the bottom of a big steel girder! (Please, no c.o.d.’s. Don’t miss out on this deal.) Ah, help me. Mr. Popeil!
Help me. Mr. Popeil! Mr. Popeil! Mr. Popeil!
It slices. it dices. Look at that tomato! You could even cut a tin can with it, But you wouldn’t want to!
Mr. Popeil, I’m in trouble. Need your assistance on the double. Oh no! now how am I gonna make My old vinyl car top look like new? Mr. Popeil! Tell me, what am I s’posed to do?
Mr. Popeil! Mr. Popeil!
But wait, there’s more! It’s not sold in any store! (Now how much would you pay?) Don’t answer yet, Just look what else you get! (Now how much would you pay?) If you order today, You get a ginsu knife and a smokeless ashtray! (Now how much would you pay?) Now how much would you pay? Mr. Popeil, Mr. Popeil. Mr. Popeil, Mr. Popeil. Mr. Popeil, Mr. Popeil. Mr. Popeil, Mr. Popeil.
Make me buy a garden weasel! Make me buy a bamboo steamer! Make me take advantage Of this amazing tv offer! (Call our toll-free number, We’ll make you such a deal.) Aw, help me! Mr. Popeil. I want it! (Mr. Popeil.) well, I need it! (Mr. Popeil.) I got to got to got to have it! Mr. Popeil! Mr. Popeil! Hey!
Style Parody: Soft rock break-up songs -inspired by Nicolette Larson’s “Still You Linger On”
Fact: The music video to the song is a parody of “More Than Words” by Extreme.
Lyrics
We’ve been together for so very long But now things are changing, oh I wonder what’s wrong? Seems you don’t want me around The passion is gone and the flame’s died down
I guess I lost a little bit of self-esteem That time that you made it with the whole hockey team You used to think I was nice Now you tell all your friends that I’m the Antichrist
Oh, why did you disconnect the brakes on my car? That kind of thing is hard to ignore Got a funny feeling you don’t love me anymore
I knew that we were having problems when You put those piranhas in my bathtub again You’re still the light of my life Oh darling, I’m beggin’, won’t you put down that knife?
You know, I even think it’s kinda cute the way You poison my coffee just a little each day I still remember the way that you laughed When you pushed me down the elevator shaft
Oh, if you don’t mind me asking, what’s this poisonous cobra Doing in my underwear drawer? Sometime I get to thinking you don’t love me any more
You slammed my face down on the barbecue grill Now my scars are all healing, but my heart never will You set my house on fire You pulled out my chest hairs with an old pair of pliers
Oh, you think I’m ugly and you say I’m cheap You shaved off my eyebrows while I was asleep You drilled a hole in my head Then you dumped me in a drainage ditch and left me for dead
Oh, you know this really isn’t like you at all You never acted this way before Honey, something tells me you don’t love me any more, oh no no Got a funny feeling you don’t love me anymore
EYG- Embrace Your Geekness 